Tuesday, 21 September 2021

Sweet '16

Fall back, Cleanhobo - there's a new bellhop in (Funk)town. Feel like I'm back in 2016 again the way I'm rewindin' Ezale teaser videos. Maybe we'll finally get that Cold Game Chronicles song which was the one with the long-deleted video teaser of Ezale climbing up the abandoned apartment complex. He really thinks that he's Tom Cruise foreal foreal.

Friday, 17 September 2021

Late pass!

Young Stoka - Ack A Ass
(From YouTube; 2010)

Young Stoka - Dope Man Swagg
(From YouTube; 2011)

Gooblums on deck, here's some decade-old Baton Rouge shit that's new to me. 70th Street Carlos and Trel Itz A Hit swear Young Stoka was THE shit to them growing up and who am I to disagree? If Stoka only has two songs to his name then at least they both crack on some low-budget Baton Rouge rogues gallery type shit - donkey boy shit on the former and dope boy shit on the latter.

Sunday, 12 September 2021

Born To Audiomack: P-Lo singles 2020/2021

Made meself a little playlist of P-Lo's current run of singles. Once a minor HBK Gang member more known for his production, P-Lo outlasted the crew's star rappers and has truly blossomed orchestrating self-produced Slap Anthemos on his lonesome. This ain't no J. Cole and his record sales, this is P-Lo and his songwriting skillz - slapinum with no features.

Friday, 10 September 2021

And dont forget MC Spoonie Gee...

AZ ft. Keffa - Keep It Real
(From Doe Or Die II album; 2021)

Expeditiously I be on my grizzly, yet I'm feelin' A-Ziggy gettin' semi-wavy by puttin' the Max in the B over Love Rap from the bottom straight to the tizzy. So, Doe Or Die II is a mess but I'll forgive AZ because it's like he made this song especially 4 me.

LMFAO @ the painfully solemn Idris Elba intro. At least mi don Idris' verse on Wiley's Boasty was sorta intentionally funny.

Sunday, 5 September 2021

Sorry Sauce 4 The Wait

Eatem - Go Get Yo F*ckin' Brotha
(From YouTube; 2021)

... speaking of 2021 Rap songs which sound and look like hit singles from an entirely different era, Eatem's wonderful Baton Rouge Brawl Music™ anthem Go Get Yo F*ckin' Brotha now has a video. People say Rap music is #problematic but what other genre is lettin' down-syndrome midgets like Baby James be all up in the videos flexin'?

Bonus actual #problematic points for bringing back Long Duk Dong's gong to announce the AZN kid's arrival for the Karate battle.

Friday, 3 September 2021


"Wockesha and one litre got me floatin', bitch, I'm on planet Mars"

Cootie & BiC Fizzle - Supafly
(From YouTube; 2021)

Conclusive proof that classic Curtis Mayfield samples can make any and all rappers sound super duper stupid fly. This shit really does Hit Different™ because it sounds and looks like a regional hit from an entirely different era.

Thursday, 2 September 2021

I'm waterproof when the rain hit

Max B - Bang Bang Boogie
(From Public Domain (Million Dollar Baby Radio) mixtape; 2006)

Every time I wipe out after deep surfin' The Wave™ I come outta that water with a song I've kinda slept on. So, move over Deez My Streets because Bang Bang Boogie is ya host's new favourite song on Max's first Public Domain mixtape. Shoot, bro - Max over The O'Jays is like a waterproof suit, yo. That grown and Gore-Tex shit for the summer, for the winter, fourth quarter, whatever, owww.

Tuesday, 31 August 2021

Generic list post: August 2021

Styles P & Max B - Kill That Faggot (remix)
(From Max B's Million Dollar Baby 2 mixtape; 2008)

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when Styles P didn't break Max B outta prison to perform the Kill That Faggot remix at the LOX and Dipset Verzuz. And that's why there needs to be a rematch when Max gets out.

Little Shawn - Hickeys On Your Chest (video) (1992)
Digable Planets - Little Renee (1993)
BIA - Whole Lotta Money (2020)
Ezale - Raised Like This (2021)
Stunnaman02 & QuakeBeatz - Big Steppin' (2021)
Homeboy Sandman - Go Hard (2021)
Max B - Revolution (2021)
Rio Da Yung OG & RMC Mike - Give Me Lyfe (2021)
Stephanie Mills - Never Get Enough Of You (1983)
Cookiee Kawaii ft. Justin Love - Donkey (2021)

Other notables: quite like Capitol 1 by EST Gee; AZ's The Wheel ain't my favourite shit but it's still a billion times better than Nas' new album (wtf? @ the guests on Doe Or Die 2 tho.)

PS: when Homeboy Sandman says "I'm like Samson in reverse" on Go Hard he's really talking about Romelu Lukaku.

Friday, 27 August 2021

And speaking of Donkeys...

"There's a genie in the bottle and she better be a model
Got a dollar to my name, Ima bet it on the lotto
We was playin' in the sand, now we playin' in the wind
'Cause if I can do it over ima do this shit again"

Max B - Revolution
(From Revolution single; 2021)

As real Max mavens know, the snippet of this one had been around for donkey's years, and when I say donkey's I ain't talkin' about Yung Eeyore French Montana, boiiiiiii. Literal vintage Bigga here.

Max's camp have re-released 75 In The Can but addded a buncha stupid bell & whistle doodads. That Paul Couture bloke just can't help himself messing Max's shit up, and the sooner Dame Grease kicks him outta the camp the better.

Tuesday, 24 August 2021

Act A Donkey

Cookiee Kawaii ft. Justin Love - Donkey
(From Soundcloud; 2021)

Why wasn't this the intro on Cookiee Kawaii's album? Very good scene-setter for her JeR&Bsey Club sound. Also, it's the real sequel to Vibe (If I Back It Up), f*ck the official Tyga remix!

Friday, 20 August 2021

Can't we just all get along...

Little Shawn - Hickeys On Your Chest
(From The Voice In The Mirror album; 1992)

Little Shawn's Hickeys On Your Chest AKA the missing link between Super Lover Cee and Ma$e. Never seen this video in such pristine quality before - possibly the only Rap video to feature Bela Lugosi. Is Little Shawn's album worth a listen? Howie Tee produced the whole thing so there must be at least one more Legit Jam™ on there.

Update: checked the album and there's nowt as good as Hickeys On Your Chest on there. Nowt as good as his later single Dom Perignon either tbqh.

Little Shawn ft. Notorious B.I.G - Dom Perignon
(From Dom Perignon single; 1995)

10/10 opportunism for Little Shawn flipping Biggie's line on Party And Bullshit into a comeback single and billing it as a Biggie cameo.

Monday, 16 August 2021

Generic list post: best bonus tracks (2000 - 2021)

When MF DOOM asked "which n*ggas is wack until they last two tracks?" on The Finest in 1999 he couldn't have ever anticipated how ridiculous the bonus track game would become in following decades: regular bonus tracks, deluxe bonus tracks, remix bonus tracks, re-released 2nd pressing bonus tracks, 2nd disc bonus tracks, European bonus tracks, Japanese bonus tracks, Australian bonus tracks, Best Buy bonus tracks, Target bonus tracks, iTunes bonus tracks, Spotify bonus tracks etc etc etc. FREEZE! This shit is outta control, for example an actor who never snapped outta his role. So, here's ya host's favourite songs from the past 20+ years which were forced to get in where they didn't fit in as bonus tracks.

Sean Price ft. Agallah & Bazaar Royale - Rising To The Top (2005)
UGK - Wood Wheel (2001)
Nas - Thief's Theme (2004)
AZ - Live Wire (2005)
50 Cent - Wanksta (2003)
Bubba Sparxxx - Disappear (2003)
Foxx ft. Boosie & Webbie - Wipe Me Down (remix) (2007)
D-Lo ft. E-40, Beeda Weeda & The Jacka - No Hoe (remix) (2009)
The Jacka - It's The Jack (2006)
Ludacris - Act A Fool (2003)
Diddy - Get Off (2006)
Young Dro - Cartoon (2006)
Max B - Blow Me A Dub (remix) (2008)
Gucci Mane - Photoshoot (2009)
Waka Flocka Flame - Luv Dem Gun Sounds (2010)
Mic Terror - Rodney King (2014)
Mac Dre ft. PSD & Dubee - Bonus Track (2004)
Jim Jones ft. Max B & Mel Matrix - Sour Deez (2006)
Birdman & Lil' Wayne - Neighbourhood Superstars (2006)
YG ft. Pushaz Inc - When I Was Gone (2014)
Prodigy - Dirty New Yorker (2008)
Future - Sh!t (2014)
Berner & The Jacka ft. J.Stalin - Live Without Me (2015)
Roc Marciano - Paradise For Pimps (2012)
Boosie - We Gon' Miss You (2010)
T.I. - You Ain't Fly (2006)
Busta Rhymes ft. Diddy & Pharrell - Pass The Courvoisier Part 2 (2002)
Rhymefest - These Days (2006)
Freeway ft. Young Chris - Line 'Em Up (2003)
Kendrick Lamar ft. Dr. Dre - The Recipe (2012)

Nothing sums up Nas' idiocy better than him relegating his last truly great song to a bonus track on one of the worst double albums in Rap history. Word is bond, son, you let yourself down like dis!?!

PS: Schrödinger's Album (noun)
A philosophical thought-experiment conducted by dullards on Rap Twitter where Nas' It Was Written is simultaneously unfairly underrated and better than Illmatic.

Thursday, 12 August 2021

Keep it in the Fam-Lay

On one hand, Fam-Lay retired from Rap without having a hit single even though he had a handful of singles which shoulda been hits. On the other hand, Fam-Lay sorta has a 2021 hit single by proxy via that BIA lass he discovered/mentors. I ain't tryna suggest his writing hand was behind BIA's rhymes on Whole Lotta Money, but her nonchalance and flow on this one sound like they were trainedtogo by him.

BIA - Whole Lotta Money
(From For Certain EP; 2020)

Related: while I was playing Duck Hunt, the DMCA treated my Fam-Lay playlist like a sitting duck. A best of Fam-Lay without either version of Rock N' Roll? That's like thinking of Lee Harvey without thinking of a Harley.

Fam-Lay ft. Lil' Flip & Kelis - Rock N' Roll (remix)
(From Rock N' Roll (remix) single; 2003)

Wednesday, 11 August 2021

Late pass!

Digable Planets - Little Renee
(From Coneheads soundtrack; 1993)

Say what you want about the 1990s, but it was the only decade where a killer Digable Planets exclusive could end up on the soundtrack to a Dan Aykroyd movie alongside songs by Slash & Michael Monroe, R.E.M, Morten Harket from A-ha, Barenaked Ladies, and Soft Cell's Tainted Love. It's a pity Aykroyd didn't have Digable Planets perform it in the movie like Digital Underground did with Same Song in Nothing But Trouble innit? Some of youze lads will probably front like you've got this song on a test-press 12" single, but I'd never heard it until a few weeks back, nor have I ever seen or heard anybody mention it before. Genuine deep cut status or wot?

Friday, 6 August 2021

Ghost Town

"I'm from the town, I'll take your bitch
Just because I was raised like this"

Ezale - Raised Like This
(From Raised Like This single; 2021)

Yeah surprises are cool, but ain't it nice that Ezale's comeback song sounds exactly like you'd expect it to sound? R.I.P Hawk Beatz - you out-DJ Freshed DJ Fresh a couple of times on Ezale's Tonite Show album and the same can be said about Raised Like This here.

Thursday, 5 August 2021

I'm A Homeboy (no K-Rob) part 2

Homeboy Sandman - Go Hard
(From Anjelitu EP; 2021)

This James Bond B-Boy Beat Bop shit now has a video. Nice paradox of No Hands and Rap Hands.

Bit disappointed Sandman hasn't dropped any more music videos of him sittin' around eatin' tortilla chips with hummus and guacamole. Must be a double-dip recession in N.Y.C.

Wednesday, 4 August 2021

Jackin' For Brits

Percee P & Ekim ft. Pharoahe Monch - Lung Collapsing Lyrics
(From Now They Wanna See Me 12" single; 1992)

Percee P's masterpiece and a masterpiece in general. That said, it's impossible for any British Rap fan of a certain age to listen to Lung Collapsing Lyrics and not think that they heard Caveman's Fry You Like Fish and bit the whole shit. Obviously both songs were drinking from the cup of Ultramagnetic MC's, but it's still a very sneaky example of Jackin' For Brits innit?

Caveman - Fry You Like Fish
(From Fry You Like Fish 12" single; 1990)

Rhymes so crisp like Golden Wonder!

Monday, 2 August 2021

Think BIG

"Last year I told n*ggas put they gun down
They shot Kool John, I got a gun now
We gotta be on ten just to have some fun now
But the racist killer cops ain't gettin' gunned down"

Stunnaman02 & QuakeBeatz - Big Steppin'
(From I Gotta Feel It album; 2021)

Shouts out to Marty Robbins, we in this bitch! No lie, comin' across Big Steppin' gives me the same sorta thrill I had when I first came across Nef The Pharoah's Big Tymin' - the excitement of findin' a current NorCal anthem with the potential to be a future Slap Classico. Nothin' remotely original, but a bit of personality and a lot of bass go a long way.

Saturday, 31 July 2021

Generic list post: July 2021

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when Ezale returned as a member of Cobra Kai and then dropped a song teaser which didn't contain a note of the song itself. Hope he ain't gonna come back soundin' like Lucas Joyner or some shit.
Mouse On Tha Track - Buckin' Hard (2011)
Mouse On Tha Track - Stop Playin' (2021)
Mic Terror ft. Gzus Piece - Thot Boyz (2021)
Ballout - Lift It Up (2021)
Cookiee Kawaii - Relax Your Mind (2021)
Cookiee Kawaii - WERK! (2021)
Prince - Hot Summer (2010/2021)
Prince - Check The Record (2010/2021)

Other notables: Who Shot Me is the best Yung Cat song in a minute, but it's some bad energy even if its premise is a staged publicity stunt; pardon the pun, but I respect the execution of Homeboy Sandman's No Beef even if its not a song I'll give much play; props to Juvenile, Mannie Fresh & Mia X for providing a literal antidote to scamdemic/plandemic Covidiot-raps.

Bonus beats: my best of Mic Terror playlist deserves to be released on CD IMHO.

Friday, 30 July 2021

Xanax Fantasia - where you at?

Cookiee Kawaii - Hey DJ
(From Vanice album; 2021)

Cookiee Kawaii - WERK!
(From Vanice album; 2021)

You peepin' this Cookiee Kawaii official debut album™ too? Relieved there's no Tyga guest verses. Tryna see if there's owt on there as good as Relax Your Mind; currently stuck on this pair of songs as two different sides of the JeR&Bsey Club coin. Waiting for some shitbird from Pitchfork or The Guardian to write a stinkpiece calling Jersey Club the new Pop-Punk.

PS: me, I'm still pissed that Vacation didn't go on to be the Corona era equivalent of Madonna's Holiday.

Tuesday, 27 July 2021

Cat Tone part whatever

Yung Cat - Who Shot Me
(From YouTub; 2021)

Yung Cat's always good for one slap per year. Not sure that taunting the people who shot you is a particularly good idea, but according to internet gossip Cat's recent shooting was just another one of his staged publicity stunts. Alas, the video of him pretending to sign a record deal has long since been deleted but this fugazi classic from Killa City's H&M store remains:

Look closely and you'll notice that the guy Cat "robs" in the H&M video is the very same guy playing guitar with the gun in the Who Shot Me video lolz.

Friday, 23 July 2021

The Linx Effect

Missin' Linx - M.I.A
(From M.I.A/Lock'D 12"; 1998)

Two things I never saw comin' when Missin' Linx's M.I.A was one of the hottest underground singles outta New York: that the song would have its thunder stolen by a Dr Dre comeback single, and that Missin' Linx would record a song with British producer Mark B which samples some incidental music from the Are You Being Served movie. Fair play to the late Mark B - he may have wasted a buncha nice beats on boring-arse British rappers, but Can't Be Stop is up there with M.I.A, Verbal Attack and What It Is as one of the best Missin' Linx jams.

Missin' Linx - Can't Be Stop
(From Sametime/Can't Be Stop 12"; 2000)

Tuesday, 20 July 2021

The BLIP-BLAPprint

Ballout - Lift It Up
(From GLOPRINT 3D album; 2021)

This is the sorta hypnotic dope boy magic I wish ZMoney was making nowadays. That BLIP-BLAP bassline, eh? Shout out Keef & Tadoe, this beat is so stoopido.

Saturday, 17 July 2021

Peace party peep, haha, see ya later!

Pour out a lil' Maker's Mark for Mr. Make The Music With Your Mouth. Of course, Biz Markie was the O.G ODB, a damn fine DJ, and a menswear pioneer who was solely responsible for the cult status of Nike's Air Safari kicks. More importantly, Biz's Goin' Off LP is #actually the best album Cold Chillin' Records ever released because that shit is stacked with anthems from top to bottom. Anyhoo, if you want some deep cuts from the Diabolical then allow me to reintroduce his Converse promo cassette single:

Since Biz recorded the G.O.A.T Elton John cover version, it's only right that Elton re-records Candle In The Wind as a tribute - goodbye Norma Jean Marcel Theo and hold ya head, Diamond Shell. I hope Heaven got a copy of that CTI 12" of Take Me To The Mardi Gras without the bells.

**EDIT** Sum shit I never saw before: Roxanne Shante & a trim-ish Biz onstage in 1986 performing Def Fresh Crew. Pardon me, the mighty Def Fresh Crew.

Footage comes from this documentary where some Bork visited New York.

Friday, 16 July 2021

Some of us blokes are thotz 2

"Gettin' head in a black Mini Cooper
She in love with a savage - Winnie Cooper"

Mic Terror ft. Gzus Piece - Thot Boyz
(From Thot Boyz single; 2021)

One of the best things about Midwest Rap is that it isn't beholden to myopic home-state bias and so all sorts of regional influences abound. Thus, you get Chicago rappers like Mic Tre & Geazy-P combining two New Orleans classics by 5th Ward Weebie and the Hot Boys on the SAME DAMN SONG! The moral of Thot Boyz? What happens in the summer, stays in the summer.

Wednesday, 14 July 2021

They used to do it out in the park(ing lot)

Mouse On Tha Track - Buckin' Hard
(From Swagga Fresh Freddie mixtape; 2011)

Stop Playin' got me lughole deep in old Mouse and cursing TRILL Ent for not letting him drop a proper retail CD. I bet George Freeman from the YouTube comment above agrees.

Friday, 9 July 2021

Born To Audiomack: Best of Mic Terror

Ya host's been sayin' Mic Terror is Chicago's best kept secret since for years so here's yer conclusive proof in playlist form. From Midwesternplayalistichooptymuzik for Jukers to irregular regular-guy raps which contain multitudes, Mic Teezy knows how to write a song, and can spit hot shit and hold a note at the SAME DAMN TIME! So, here's 25 songs from the conscious rapper who'll leave you unconscious (no J. Cole.)

~~ Best of Mic Terror ~~
1. Hoopty Music (2007)
2. Juke Them Hoes (2007)
3. If God Was Mic (2008)
4. Get Off (2008)
5. I'm An Asshole (2008)
6. Dickey Simpkins ft. J.U.I.C.E (2009)
7. My Bitch Tonight (2010)
8. Going (2010)
9. Chief Sampson (2011)
10. Habibi (2011)
11. The Heaux Love Me (2012)
12. Rodney King (2012)
13. 15 Minutes (2014)
14. Get Off My Dick ft. DJ Gant-Man (2014)
15. N.W.G (2014)
16. I Don't Call The Cops (2016)
17. Ironic (2018)
18. For The Heaux (2019)
19. Playa Shit (2019)
20. Ambitionz To Get Higher (2019)
21. Head In The Morning (2019)
22. The ABC's (2019)
23. Nobody Loves Me ft. Gitta (2019)
24. Forever Gangster ft. Gzus Piece & Bruus (2020)
25. Ride (2020)

Previously: Born To Audiomack: Edan Deep Cuts.

Wednesday, 7 July 2021

Dat Boot

Mouse On Tha Track - Stop Playin'
(From the internet; 2021)

Don't call it a comeback but this is what I'm tryna hear from Mouse. Str8 up Boot bow bow bow bow bow Bounce for the juveniles, jiggalators, and jentlemen.

Sunday, 4 July 2021

Supa Sunday In N.J

Cookiee Kawaii - Relax Your Mind
(From Relax Your Mind single; 2021)

Back up on the Jersey Club shore again today. Here at The Martorialist we don't listen to no Hip-Hop on Sunday mornings, we listen to rebranded New JeR&Bsey Hip-House. Word around the cosmos, God sayz go upwards of 125 BPM or go home.

Ol' girl Kawaii clearly understands the B&B rule: if your single's video must have an intro then fill said intro with Birds & Bums. Take note rappers!

Wednesday, 30 June 2021

Generic list post: June 2021

DJ Kayslay ft. nearly everybody ever - Rolling 110 Deep
(From Accolades EP; 2021)

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when Kayslay orchestrated a 110 rapper deep posse cut/video with Lord Jamar doing virus/crisis/third iris #Scamdemic raps. Ain't gonna pretend like I watched the entire 40 minute video but I can't help but be impressed that Slay managed to get AZ, Ice-T, Coke La Rock, Uncle Murda, E-A-Ski, Pretty Tone Capone, Gunplay, and Nice & Smooth on the SAME DAMN SONG!

Phil Blunts - On The Attack (video) (1996)
Blackalicious - Make You Feel That Way (2002)
A-Wax & Smigg Dirtee - What We Bout (2007/2021)
Dru Down - Everywhere I Go (2021)
Homeboy Sandman - Yup. Do It! (2021)
Homeboy Sandman - Superman (2021)
Reese Youngn - Warrior (2021)
Jenevieve - Midnight Charm (2021)
Children Of Zeus - I Know (2021)
SAULT - Bitter Streets (2021)

Other notables: Homeboy Sandman's non-Slice of Life song was cool too; in the canon of Posse On Broadway beatjacks, Gucci Mane & Pooh Shiesty's Posse On Bouldercrest is slightly better than Yo Gotti's Reppin' North Memphis, but nowhere near as good as E-40's Big Ballin' With My Homies or Dipset's 145th & Broadway.

Saturday, 26 June 2021

I stand AGAINST Pitchfork Union imho

Sometimes you've gotta let a One Song Wonder™ stay a One Song Wonder™, and sometimes you've got your fingers crossed the One Song Wonder™ will drop Another One™. What I'm basically tryna say here is that Jenevieve has finally dropped a worthy follow up to Baby Powder but I don't know how to pontificate about it without soundin' like some Pitchfork poptimist.

Jenevieve - Midnight Charm
(From Midnight Charm single; 2021)

Lmfao @ these boring bastard music critics twisting themselves into knots writing thousands upon thousands of words about poptimism and not even realising that Stock Aitken Waterman invented the concept in 1989 as a single for The Reynolds Girls.

Wednesday, 23 June 2021

I'm a Homeboy (no K-Rob)

"If you're lookin' for a fad then you got the wrong lad
And if you're lookin' for the same then you caught the wrong train
If you're lookin' for a hack, I'll never write back
But if you're lookin' for the champ, you found the right chap"

Homeboy Sandman - Go Hard
(From his upcoming Anjelitu EP; 2021)

No K-Rob because Homeboy is more of a Rammellzee, natch. This new song has nowt to do Sandman's current slice of life series but the overall effect is the same: some B-Boy Beat Bop shit to soundtrack the battle with your internal monologue.

Monday, 21 June 2021

Week Move

Mac Dre - Off The Rictor
(From Heart Of Gangsta - Mind Of A Hustler - Tongue Of A Pimp album; 2000)

Mac Dre - Don't Hate Tha Playa
(From The Game Is... Thick Pt. 2 album; 2004)

Sod a Mac Dre Monday because it's Mac Dre Monday Thru Sunday here at The Martorialist. Thump traffic is at an all time high and both these songs are far better Thizzle Dance records than Thizzle Dance itself. You can't tell me nuffink and you can't spell Mac Dre without MDMA or sumfink.

**EDIT** BigSleep found which Dre DVD the Dubee jibber-jabber from P-Lo's Walked In comes from. Peep 7:30 in this video:

Wednesday, 16 June 2021

A Good Combination™

Or, in the case of these two new Homeboy Sandman songs from his Slice of Life YouTube series, A Canny Juxtaposition™ which results in a Full Multimedia Experience™: it's the contrast of recurring word shit-talk Rap with visualz of a rapper doing regular everyday shit. Shit's irregular but it's normal.

Homeboy Sandman - I Got This
(From YouTube; 2021)

Homeboy Sandman - Superman
(From YouTube; 2021)

Boy Sand is kinda like the backpack LL Cool J in that only a dozen people on the planet ever saw him with a full head of hair, and when I say dozen you know what I'm talkin' about, boooooiiiii!

Previously: My Kitchen.

Monday, 14 June 2021

Generic list post: 21 not from 2021

6 months deep into this year, here's 21 non-2021 Rap songs which have been all up in there like my ear hair. I don't trust folks who only check for old music, but I also don't trust folks who only check for new music.

DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince - Jeff Waz On The Beatbox (live) (1989)
Me & E - Whatcha Need (1989)
KMD - Scrambled Eggs (1992/2021)
Perfection ft. Snoop Doggy Dogg - Understand Perfection (1992)
The Pharcyde - Ya Mama (live on The Word) (1993)
Coop MC - Blue Sunday (1995)
Phil Blunts - On The Attack (video) (1996)
Major Weight Media - Natural (1997)
Sporty Thievz - Ya Don't Stop (1998)
Lil' Sin ft. Mr. Joshay - Love It Or Hate It (1998)
Killah Priest ft. Shangai The Messenger - Atoms To Adam (1998)
Ugly Duckling - Fresh Mode (1999)
Andre Nickatina - Nickatina Says (2000)
KLC ft. Mannie Fresh - No Place Like Home (2006/2021)
Eastside L Boog - Teach U How 2 Jack (2009)
Digital Underground ft. J. Stalin - Hyphy Hump (2010)
Foxx - Friends (2011)
Homeboy Sandman - Conjugal Visit To The Prison Of The Mind (2014)
P-Lo - Boomerang (2020)
CeeFineAss ft. MoneyBagg Yo - Payback 2.0 (2020)
Tony Shhnow - F*ckwitcha (2020)

Thursday, 10 June 2021

It Follows

Dru Down - Everywhere I Go
(From Livin' Legend Pt 2 album; 2021)

He's washed up now obviously but Dru's still down to drop one super-catchy slap per album. Someone check the pollen count on this one because it's all up in my head like hayfever. Produced by Donatello who did one of my favourite D squared tracks from a few years back.

Sunday, 6 June 2021

Mostly Tha Voice: The Next Level

"I guess we had the right song with the wrong key
Why every time I try to tell you go that you don't leave?
I guess we had the right coat with the wrong sleeves
Even though this shit comin' out my throat It's beeeeyond meeeee"

Reese Youngn - Warrior
(From Warrior single; 2021)

Damn - that lad who went viral for soundin' like Rich Homie Quan gargling with magma on his No More Parties In L.A remix is actually kinda sick huh? Give Warrior to anyone else and it'd be some standard MOR Spotify-core; give it to Reese Youngn to howl fire & brimstone into it and Warrior becomes the molten sound at the core of a man's soul (or sumfink lol.) Basically, it's mostly tha voice which makes this one hit different.

Wednesday, 2 June 2021

My Kitchen

Homeboy Sandman - Yup. Do It!
(From YouTube; 2021)

Similar vybz to Conjugal Visit To The Prison Of The Mind with this new Sandman single: a rollerskating jam for literal and figurative eggheads. On one hand, I'm happy to see a kitchen used in a Rap video for something other than pretending to cook crack; on the other hand, I'm disgusted to see Brussels Sprouts in a Rap video. Keep Brussels Sprouts outta Rap videos! Feet too!

Speakin' of feet, this fat-era Sandman single has become a personal favourite. No rollerskates or wheels required here, this is poundin' pavements music. It's often said that New York rappers don't know how to make car music, but Sandman turns that shortcoming into a strength on this one.

Homeboy Sandman - Stroll
(From Hallways album; 2014)

Pardon the pun, but dome blown within the comforts of my own home @ that "do the homeless feel without a home or just feel at home everywhere?" line.

Tuesday, 1 June 2021

Can You Phil Me?

Phil Blunts - On The Attack
(From On The Attack 12" single; 1996)

A '96 Yonkers minor classic which never ascended to Tunnel Banger status and now finds itself lost in Random-Rap purgatory. Never in a month of Black Sundays or Blue Mondays did I ever imagine Phil Blunts' On The Attack would have a video but looka here, boys & very occasional girl. Song's hot like quilts... except for that lyric at 01:31. It doesn't ruin the song for me but does make me wince. Why you wanna say that bruv, huh?

Maybe there's another secrete & rare video for Phil's other late 90's single They Don't Really Love Us? If this ain't the most Queens-soundin' song to ever come from Yonkers then I'll eat LL's Kangol hat.

Phil Blunts ft. Black Jesus - They Don't Really Love Us
(From They Don't Really Love Us 12" single; 1997)

Handily, you can get both these songs on the same damn 12" single.

Sunday, 30 May 2021

Generic list post: May 2021

INXS - Mediate
(From Kick album; 1987)

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when ya host finally checked out Killah Priest's first album. Fair play to Priest for inventing a Rap style based on Michael Hutchence's Mediate flow. Maybe KP was an Aussiephile in general and the production on Heavy Mental was a homage to Down Under's most famous didgeridoo player?

Killah Priest ft. Shangai The Messenger - Atoms To Adam (1998)
Sporty Thievz - Ya Don't Stop (1998)
Homeboy Sandman - Stress (2020)
Nino Man - 5-0 (2021)
Uncle Murda - Bro Shit (2021)
Max B - 75 In The Can (2021)
P-Lo - Going Off (2021)
Rio Da Yung OG - Last Call (2021)
Eatem - Go Get Yo F*ckin' Brotha (2021)
A1 x J1 - Latest Trends (2021)
Donae'O - She Belongs To The Night (2021)
Chromium - Time Traveller (1979)
DAWN - Boomerang (2021)

Other notables: A-Wax's flow on Trophy Case is so cold that I can forgive the track's Spotify Playlist-core percussion; Saweetie and Young Slo-Be both made songs which entered my rotation for the first time with Fast Motion and Slime Ball respectively.

Friday, 28 May 2021

New Rap Slanguage

"Go get yo f*ckin' brotha, I'm fightin' both of y'all
I cracked his fortune cookie, left him leakin' sorry sauce"

Eatem - Go Get Yo F*ckin' Brotha
(From Go Get Yo F*ckin Brotha single; 2021)

They do things differently in Baton Rouge: whereas Tom, Dick or Billy from yer average American city will tell a h8er to "go get your fuckin' shinebox", them Boyz-N-The-Rouge will tell you to "go get yo f*ckin' brotha!" For Eatem fans and Baton Rouge Brawl Music™ fans in general, this song is Whoop Sum part deux.

Tuesday, 25 May 2021

That British BBQ music, bitch!

Donae'O - She Belongs To The Night
(From She Belongs To The Night single; 2021)

Who debuted in the U.K Garage era and still drops choonz no competition, it's Donae'O

He now rides through London on his U.K Funky revival expedition, it's Donae'O

This choon also brings some South African Amapiano vybz to the party, it's Donae'O

And this choon almost makes me forgive him for jinxing Thomas Partey, it's Donae'O

Monday, 24 May 2021

Sporty Spicez

Sporty Thievz - Dogz
(From The Lost Cinema Pt 1 album; late 90s/2021)

Highlight of that recent album of unreleased Sporty Thievz songs imho. Chauvinism as an artform with a dash of equal opportunity hating from da ladeez. Definitely feel like The Culcha™ was robbed of this song being the follow up single Cheapskate, though they'd have to get their Nutty Professor on to come up with a clean edit. Also a huge pity Hot Pursuit got shelved because it's some Sporty & The Bandit type shit which lives up to the Street Cinema title of their debut album.

Sporty Thievz - Hot Pursuit
(From The Lost Cinema Pt 1 album; late 90s/2021)

Bonus beats: there's a few other deep gems on King Kirk's Bandcamp for #SportyThievzHive. Any Rap song with the Le Pamplemousse bass break is automatically a 4/5 banger.

Sporty Thievz - Ya Don't Stop
(From Diehard Sampler '98 "Lost In Yonkers" compilation; 1998)

Friday, 21 May 2021

Can You Hear Me?

Max B - 75 In The Can
(From 75 In The Can single; 2021)

75 In The Can? More like Recorded With A Coca Cola Can amirite? Nonetheless, Max having his wicked way with a cheap revamp of Dru Down's favourite song by The Fat Boys is right up my road.

It's New York treats friday with new Max and an album of unreleased Sporty Thievz songs. Dogz and Thief Thing are soundin' like some vintage Sporty X Ski Beatz to me.

Wednesday, 19 May 2021

#P-LoHive 1nce Again: Shmob Figaz

P-Lo - Going Off
(From Going Off single; 2021)

Husalah homage alert! P-Lo's killer little run of singles continues with his 5th yumper in a row. Man's slowly but consistently dropping anthems when too many of his NorCal contemporaries are content to drop any old shite in the name of #content. If a Bay Area slap doesn't make you turf dance a hole in your living room carpet then toss that song out on the corner and let the bin men take it away.

PS: I found the intro from Walked In.

Friday, 14 May 2021

Murda was the case in point

"Don't come round me talking all this Crew shit
You was strapped, saw the kid who shot me and ain't do shit
If that was me on the othеr hand
Woulda shot him and the n*gga he was with, I'm just keeping it a hunnid, fam
So miss me with all the phony shit
Woulda did a bid for you, thinkin' we was on somе real homie shit
That woulda been time away from my kids, n*gga
Woulda been sick thinkin' bout all the sucka shit you did, n*gga
But it is what it is, n*gga"

Uncle Murda - Bro Shit
(From Don't Come Outside, Vol. 3 mixtape; 2021)

Me & Uncle Murda go back like Lil' Baby & Young Thug songs not named Pacifier, but my old chum ain't made shit dope since Cam'Ron Voice. Fortunately, friendship is a song topic which has brought the best out of everyone from Whodini to Dag Nasty and here it proves to be the ideal framework for Murda's foulness to flourish into a Bro Betrayal Ballad™. Listen closer tho because in every slice of Uncle Murda's ig'nance there's always a kernel of truth.

Last week it was Nino Man, this week it's Uncle Murda. Check back next week to see if I've found a Dave East song I like (probably not unless he miraculously drops some undeniable shit.)

Tuesday, 11 May 2021

Shinola songs from the shittiest artists (part 2)

Like the Mermaid mum in Round The Twist, this series may have legs.

Roots Manuva - Witness (1 Hope)
(From Run Come Save Me album; 2001)

A spectacular fluke in the otherwise dull career of stoner/student fave Roots Manuva or wot? Witness (1 Hope) is some bionic Englo-Jamaican Bashment-Rap - basically, that's my fancy way of saying it's the only U.K Hip-Hop song you can play in a DJ set between Mr. Oizu's Flat Beat and Dizzee Rascal's I Luv U.

Bad Bascomb - Black Grass
(From Black Grass Music album; 1973)

Breakbeat Lenny's Ultimate Breaks and Beats compilations contain a fair few shinola songs by the shittiest artists. For my money, Bad Bascomb's Black Grasss is the best of the bunch and I type that with the authority of someone who once bought Bascomb's one LP in the vein hope it contained any other jams (spoiler: it doesn't.) Originally a B-Boy favourite which Howie Tee later used as the backbone of Special Ed's Hoedown, Black Grass is peak Duelling Banjos-core.

A1 x J1 - Latest Trends
(From Latest Trends single; 2021)

Even Russell Grant couldn't have predicted that a CBeebies U.K Drill equivalent of WSTRN's In2 would be Brit-Rap's first legit anthem of 2021. Nuff respect to A1 x J1 for stickin' to the Nice & Smooth blueprint of one short chunky member & one long skinny member.

Thursday, 6 May 2021

Try to take it all in stride, please don't keep it all inside

"Stresses are all around
Stress wants to be a verb, make sure that it's a noun
When stresses are repressed, effects can be profound
So don't be in denial when stress is goin' down"

Homeboy Sandman - Stress
(From Don't Feed The Monster album; 2020/YouTube; 2021)

Better out than in: off-kilter observational Rap that's more of an Overlord Of Overthinking handbook than Organized Konfusion's hall of famer and its equally hallowed remix. This song properly clicked for me when I realised it's got that sneaky MF Grimm Tick Tick sloppy-choppy energy in Sandman's flow and Quelle Chris' production. Brain sick, tick tick, stress will blow it up!

MF Grimm - Tick Tick
(From MF DOOM's Operation: Doomsday album; 1999)

Tick Tick definitely ranks somewhere in the upper echelon of ya host's top ten G.O.A.T guest solo songs on other rapper's albums. The other nine? In no particular order: Lady Of Rage's G Funk (Intro) from Snoop's Doggystyle; Mac Dre's Game I'm Spittin' from Dubee's AKA Sugawolf; MF DOOM's I Hear Voices Part 1 from MF Grimm's The Downfall Of Ibylis; Kurious' Fastlane from King Gheedorah's Take Me To Your Leader; Fam-Lay's FamLay Freestyle from The Clipse's Lord Willin'; Lil' Cease's O.G solo version of Crush On You from Lil' Kim's Hard Core; Lil' Wayne's Wayne's Takeover 1 from Mannie's The Mind Of Mannie Fresh; Un Kasa's Un Casa from Dipset's Diplomatic Immunity; and Memphis Bleek's Hand It Down from Jay Camel's Volume 2.

Tuesday, 4 May 2021

To The Max (no Stezo)

"F*ck 5-0!
I was tryna get a bag on the ave but the slabs with 12 knocked down my do'
Had Show & Tell money, now I need bail money, man, 12 f*cked up my dough
Yeah, the trap was a crib so I stashed where I live, shoulda never had it there I know
Now n*ggas tryna take my flow, I blame 12 so f*ck 5-0!"

Nino Man - 5-0
(From No Turning Back EP; 2021)

Oi! Copper! Leave them dealers alone! New wave Harlem waviness for the Roddy Rich Homie Quan Durk-core generation. Conclusive proof that all New York rappers have at least one absolute CHOON in them when they take tips from the Max B manual to making music

Sunday, 2 May 2021

Late pass!

Something I learned today: Run-D.M.C performed You Be Illin' and It's Tricky on the BBC's Old Grey Whistle Test in 1987. Rap music and Adidas is how I was raised, Run-D.M.C and the Beasties were the guys that I praised - thus, seeing this as a kid in 1987 woulda blown my mind almost as hard as seeing King Of Rock on Live Aid did.

Turns out Run-D.M.C were also interviewed on Old Grey Whistle Test a couple of years earlier during the King Of Rock era. Andy Kershaw is lucky he didn't get sparked out on TV for some of those questions - the epitome of a stereotypical clueless white host demanding black artists make 'protest music'. Maybe if Kershaw had spent less time harassing his ex-wife and more time researching the artists he was interviewing then he'd know that Run-D.M.C had already released Hard Times and Wake Up by that point.

Thursday, 29 April 2021

Generic list post: April 2021

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when Something For The Weekend unfortunately meant Rappers dying every week. Pour out a little beverage of your choice for Shock G and Black Rob. DMX too, though I only like a handful of his songs tbqh.

Me & E - Whatcha Need (1989)
Major Weight Media - Natural (1997)
Homeboy Sandman - Conjugal Visit To The Prison Of The Mind (2014)
P-Lo - Boomerang (2020)
P-Lo - Walked In (2021)
Mac J - Gotta Grudge (2021)
CupcaKKe - Mosh Pit (2021)
Chilly - For Your Love (12" version) (1978)
Cajmere - So Happy (2021)
Beabadoobee - Apple Cider (2019)

Other notables: that Gzus Haze album ain't bad but doesn't really have any stand-out songs imho; did anyone need a Real Instruments™ remake of Grand Puba's I Like It?; for my sins, I quite enjoy the CBeebies U.K Drill of Latest Trends by A1 & J1.

Bonus reading: can you believe 1991 was 30 years ago? (part 2) and shinola songs by the shittiest artists.

Monday, 26 April 2021

Curtis Jones' Future Shock

Cajmere - So Happy
(From So Happy single; 2021)

Some shit I wasn't expecting to find this morning: a new Cajmere choon based around James Brown's I'm Satisfied which sounds as Dirt McGirt Cajploitation as I'd hoped it would. Crazy visionz, BOOM: Cajmere's alter-ego Green Velvet is the ideal person to bring James Brown's batshit crazy late 70's TV show Future Shock back to life amirite?

Bonus beats: City Girls recently interpolating Percolator got me thinkin' about other Cajmere songs primed for rappers to use. Somebody could REALLY have their wicked way with Let Me Be, though that somebody preferably wouldn't be Kid Cudi, Vic Mensa or Makonnen.

Cajmere - Let Me Be
(From Underground Goodies Vol. 4 EP; 1992)

Saturday, 24 April 2021

#P-LoHive reprise

P-Lo - Walked In
(From Yours EP; 2021)

Walked in and shit got spooky the way this one has grown on me. It's definitely the most P-Lo Type Beat™ of his last four singles, but in a Hella good way. For best results use Walked In as the B-Side to Yours - an Oakland Yin & Yang combination of sweet romancing & dumb dancing which Shock G would be proud of.

Previously: #P-LoHive.

Friday, 23 April 2021

If we sacrifice Stevie G to a volcano can we get Shock G back?

Shock G never attacked an innocent DJ for rejecting a Phil Collins song request!

FFS is this 2021's new normal where a Rapper dies every Friday? R.I.P to Shock G AKA Humpty Hump AKA Piano Man AKA MC Blowfish AKA The Packet Man AKA Rackadelic AKA the musical genius who did think with his penis. Half the Rap eccentricities Kool Keith brags he invented, Shock G has a more legitimate claim to, and, as I recently realised, Humpty Hump even pioneered Hyphy. It seems like Digital Underground have been shunted into the margins of Rap history but this shouldn't come as a surprise - any Rappers who dare to display a sense of humour get deemed "non lyrical" and end up derided as glorified novelty acts no matter how great their music is.

Well, fuk the history books and anyone who wrote 'em because Digital Underground's first album and follow-up EP are God-tier Rap music, and Shock was a true genius Rapper/producer/dancer auteur. A man of many talents, he even bodied a couple 80's Hollywood comedy legends in their own movie, somehow coaxed a good remix out of CJ Mackintosh, and transformed a forgettable Prince single into Prince's last great song. Pop a Sex Packet for the Funk Mob Extraordinaire who originated sock puppeting on wax. Oh, how we'll forever love to bump thee.

The Apollo: officially more receptive to Digital Underground than Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince!