The Micgic Number

"These hoes look me in my eyes and call me beautiful
I say you right, baby, but bitch you still delusional
Moral is, two things can be right at the same time
Bitch-ass n***as done wrote some of the most insane lines"

Bruus ft. Mic Terror & Gzus Piece - All I Do
(From All I Do single; 2026)

Nothin' Can Stop had me open for another Bruus & Mic Terror track. Throw Gzus Piece into the mix and I'm a happy camper like Bruce Springsteen's sister in Sleepaway Camp II. This one has got us real #MicTerrorHive members firing up Chief Sampson right after.

My Mind Spray 22

MF DOOM made two of my favourite Rap albums of all time with Operation Doomsday and Black Bastards. But I view 60% of his recorded output in the same way that I view Lionel Messi's post-Barcelona career: best to pretend that it didn't happen as to not tarnish the legacy. Obviously the 2 Czarface albums DOOM recorded in his final years are the musical equivalent of Messi scoring free kicks and tap ins against farmers in the MLS.

I was unfortunate enough to hear some of the 2 Hard 4 The F**kin' Radio homage by That Canadian Nonce™. How is it even possible to make interpolating Mac Dre lyrics over a P-Lo beat sound like a sanitary towel commercial? That guy has the worst voice in the history of recorded music, and it boggles my mind that anyone finds his whiney music tolerable let alone pleasurable.

I'm not saying I wish that Russia would launch a drone strike on Toronto. I'm just saying that any city which inflicted That Canadian Nonce™ and Mindbender Futurama on the world deserves some sort of punishment.

Run-D.M.C's Raising Hell was the first Rap album I bought, and JayQuan is my favourite old skool Rap history-bod, so of course his recent book about the album is a Good Combination™. JayQuan is a convivial author who experienced the era and the album's impact from front, back & side to side, and he's big on details without being an annoying nutjob windbag like Dart Adams. Anecdotes and actual factz are provided by everyone involved in the making of the album, and it doesn't hurt that the book is fulla pictures of Run-D.M.C lookin' cooler than Polish feet.

More, more, more!

Duke Deuce - Feathers Up
(From Feathers Up single; 2026)

Duke Deuce · Feathers Up

70th Street Carlos' new single is so moreish, I need another song with similar berserker energy like now and shit, y'know, that shit now, I'm talkin' now. Alas, I don't have Cooky Puss' number, so I gave Duke Deuce a call and got him to pop back up with a real Memphis slobberknocker of a song. Cot-damn, he could beat Andre The Giant with this track. Giant Gonzalez too.

BOATs and hoes

Trim - BOAT (live performance)
(From Audio Exhbit YouTube channel; 2026)

People have been mocking that Trim bird's live performance at the Rolling Loud festival. Which is ironic to me because thee definitive version of her break out song BOAT isn't the studio version or the remixes with YKNiece & BunnaB or Pooh Shiesty, it's this performance of it on the Audio Exhbit YouTube channel. She nails the timing and delivery, and her voice sounds better all natural without any studio trickery. You can't tell me nuffink to the contrary.

Some of my most-listened to Rap songs in 2026 are songs from 2025: Make Her Gig by Ezale, Disco Kryptonite by Newcleus, That's A Playa by Young Bari & BossLife Big Spence, No Lie by OnlyHeaven, and BOAT right here. Like Styles P nearly said, I don't care about the release date and whenever it dropped, I don't care about anything except the song being in my rotation because it's hot.

Berserker Bounce back!

70th Street Carlos - Get Out The Way
(From Get Out The Way single; 2026)

Boosie FatAzz caught a second wind off the second line. Legitimately thought this was a 2016 to 2018 Carlos song when I first clocked it: the Webbiefro is back in full bloom and the beat sounds like it could be a Trel Itz A Hit production. 'Los is back in that water like LL Cool J's parrot.

You don't wanna lose me like new I.D

Cool Kids ft. Lil' Wayne - Gettin' It
(From the internet; 2008)

tfs · The Cool Kids Ft Lil Wayne- Gettin It (320 Kbps)

I'm stickin' to the script like java when I say that Gettin' It still sounds hotter than lava. A very necessary rearrangement of Jam-Master Jay after Nas stunk the original beat up with his nauseating sex rhymes when he jacked it for You Know My Style. Gettin' It is such a message in a bottle from the Blog Era™ innit? The Cool Kids did their thing for 2 16s before Lil' Wayne came through and gaffled the song with 3 verses. Gettin' It was a loosie which was never released to retail and has still never made it to DSPs, but the MP3 went platinum on Hulkshare.

My favourite Cool Kids memory: Will High being absolutely disgusted by Mikey Rocks' skinny jeans in the Black Mags video. Absolute fury from a bloke who hadn't even listened to music made by blk ppl since 1999. My other favourite Cool Kids nemory: Mikey Rocks blowing my mind and my laptop speakers at the SAME DAMN TIME when I first heard it on MySpace in 2007. It was, to paraphrase Jason Fox, new school Rap with an old school steelo.

Cool Kids - Mikey Rocks
(From the internet; 2007/The Bake Sale album; 2008)

Smvrk · The Cool Kids - Mikey Rocks

Even more importantly than that, the Cool Kids MySpace page led me to discover future Martorialist favourite/Chicago's best kept secret Mic Terror via Cold As Hell and Juke Them Hoes. Shout out to Tom Anderson, the only tech-bloke social media entrepreneur who made the world a better place and then dipped with that Murdoch money.

My Mind Spray 21

Beastie Boys - Looking Down The Barrel Of A Gun
(From Paul's Boutique album; 1989)

One of the greatest mini-moments in Rap music: that 2 thump drum breakdown at 1:49 in Looking Down The Barrel Of A Gun. It lasts barely 2 seconds, but it hits like a cattle prod to my body and turns me into Busta in the Everything Remains Raw intro to the Woo-Hah video.

The Assembly - Mob Throb
(From The Assembly album; 2026)

The Assembly is a new Sic Wid It group comprising of E-40, Cousin Fik & Hitta Slim FKA Laroo T.H.H. DJ Fresh's mob musik synths on this song are so high-pitched they could be used as a dog whistle for missing pooches. High praise or wot?

Mýa Jammer

Mýa ft. Too $hort - Just A Little Bit
(From Just A Little Bit single; 2026)

This ain't Gina G, motherf**kers! $hort and Mýa go back like babies and pacifiers? Most unexpected collaboration of 2026 so far or wot? This song sounds like it could have dropped at any point in the last 30 years and that's why it's so good. Throwback R&Boogie which NorCal's electric-boogalooing fonky-grampa OG Mike Chaos can strut his stuff to. This shit is so Grown & Gorgeous™ that $hort even put a suit and tie on for the video.