Thursday, 30 June 2022

Generic list post: June 2022

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when I found out that the cassingle of Big Scoob's Champagne On The Block had an amazing front cover. Those of us who own the 12" got shafted.

Big Scoob - U Got It (2002)
Yung Joc - A Couple Grand (2006)
Monaleo - We Not Humping (2021)
Eatem ft. BR Cowboy - Magical (2022)
Duke Deuce ft. Glorilla - Just Say That (2022)
Homeboy Sandman - Fruit Day 1 (2022)
Consequence - Blood Stain (2022)
Westside Boogie ft. DRAM - AIGHT (2022)
P-Lo ft. Larry June - Good (2022)
Ezale - Hotel Motel (2022)
Knucks ft. Sainte - Playa (2022)

Other notables: I'm still not tryna hear G-Herbo soundalikes over Jersey Club beats but Asian Doll's song featuring Bandmanrill is hot like summertime with corduroys; Seiji Oda's What It Feel Like is a cool little stopgap song; as someone who has a soft spot for French Montana I didn't need him on a remix of the best U.K single of 2022.

PS: they were only Lil' like Chris, but I made a couple of playlists this month: five New York 12" songs I love and my top 5 NorCal Rap songs of 2022 so far.

PPS: I wouldn't necessarily say that Playa is one of my favourite songs on the Knucks album, but that chorus stays richochetting and reverberating around my head all day, so I've ended up listening to it more than the album's de facto best songs.

Wednesday, 29 June 2022

You were ALWAYS the bellhop, Mr. Ezale

Ezale - Hotel Motel
(From Hotel Motel single; 2022)



The Andrehick Hotel Motel has a new employee - heeeeeere's Ezay. I did say that Ezale songs tend to be different than the snippets suggest and, boy, is that true with this one because the I Get Around beat-switcheroo from teaser number two is now entirely slo-mo Screwed. WTF - the Pol Pot of the Pillionaire's Boys Club keeps pretzelling my pomegranate, man. Regardless, Ezale singles are always mini-movies in musical form. Gonna tell my kid this is The Shining.

Ezale caught the Furley Ghost with that Stupid Doo Doo Dumb moment @ 1:34. Best sittin' on the bog reveal scene in a music video since Tom DeLonge in Blink-182's All The Small Things.

Tuesday, 28 June 2022

Late pass!

"N*gga, stop talkin', just come suck it
When it's smoke, bet the opps gon' duck it
We kick smoke up, they kick buckets"


Monaleo - We Not Humping
(From We Not Humping single; 2021)



How come none of you fooken' humps told me about this song eh eh? Could end up being my favourite 2022 song which #actually dropped in December 2021. There's a recent remix of this with Flo Milli which is a better City Girls single than City Girls' latest single, but the remix ain't as satisfying as Monaleo's solo original. As D.W Griffiths' nearly said, all you need is a girl rhyming about her guns.

Other contenders for my favourite 2022 song which #actually dropped in December 2021: Sometimes by Tony Shhnow and Road To Riches by Yuno Miles.

Monday, 27 June 2022

Diamond D & The Psycho-Spiritual Neurotic

"Being a human being is abrasive
They throw you on the job without no orientation
It's not like everyday I need a standing ovation
Before I leave I'd like to leave a couple of traces
Roll the dice and move ahead a couple of spaces
Shed the fear of flying and defy limitation
Recognise the signs and their interpretation
Take an ancient science and apply innovation
I'm not one to make haste or stay patient
So every single day is like a paid vacation"


Homeboy Sandman - Fruit Day 1
(From I Can't Sell These album; 2022)



Marky Mark, The Mighty Ducks, Good Vibrations on my fave song from Homeboy Sandman's new Lost Tapes type album. Conclusive proof that every New York rapper of note should beatjack Diamond D's Freestyle (Yo That's That Shit) for a Lyrical Exercise song. But then, you knew that already if you've heard Sean Price's 60 Bar Dash, right?

Thursday, 23 June 2022

Born To Audiomack: Five N.Y Twelves

Here at The Martorialist we keep a stylus pen like a fiend keep a pipe with him, so here's another quick quinary of quality playlist. Revisiting Big Scoob's early 2000's singles has got me in the mood for some personal classic New York 12" singles, thus here's five songs I love like RZA & Kool G. Rap loved Cakes. Cool thing about this era of New York Rap is that everybody who was deep in them record racks and up on them webstores experienced shit differently, and so songs like Missin' Linx's Can't Be Stop or Lord Sear's Ya Mouth Stink might not have entered your orbit but they're both 5 Star General choonz to me.

1. Phil Blunts - On The Attack (1996)
2. Consequence - Rock N Roll (1997)
3. Blahzay Blahzay - Ice Grillz (2000)
4. B-1 ft. Large Professor - Put Yo' Self In My Place (2000)
5. Ayatollah ft. Rakim - A Cold Feeling (2002)



1. Phil Blunts' Yonkers classic On The Attack which should be a proper New York classic. N.Y drama-core that's so good it can make me overlook Phil's very #problematic line about rape.

2. Had a soft spot for Consequence ever since I heard Rock N Roll. Alongside ATCQ's The Jam, this is one of the best examples of late 90s clip-clop Dilla production imho.

3. Not a lotta people know this, but the second best song Blahzay Blahzay & P.F. Cuttin' ever recorded is Ice Grillz. Some mean-muggin' Brooklyn winter warz Rap.

4. B-1 is best known for his guest spots on Kool G. Rap's 4, 5, 6 album and his two singles on Rawkus Records, but for Q.B connoisseurs his true Dunn-Rap hall of fame tune is Put Yo' Self In My Place.

5. There were only two good things to come from Rakim's tenure with Aftermath Records: the Truth Hurts song he guested on and the Ayatollah banger A Cold Feeling. Supposedly recorded for The Wash soundtrack, it woulda sounded perfect on Kay Slay's first compilation.

~~> DOWNLOAD HERE <~~

Tuesday, 21 June 2022

Wanted dead or alive: Kryptonite by Big Scoob

Big Scoob's Kryptonite was a minor classic which rang out alongside Ante Up in summer 2000, but I've only ever seen it uploaded online as the instrumental. Perhaps Kryptonite is a true You Had To Be There™ tune: Big Daddy Kane's former back-up dancer dropping a Superman theme sampling indie single which became a Funkmaster Flex Tunnel Banger™ staple. Here in the U.K, Kryptonite was a rare example of a Westwood favourite which got love in Mr. Bongo by British backpackers who had their Jansports strapped too tight. Step Won came thru with the Ronaldinho to Rivaldo type assist, so I threw the MP3 up on Audiomack and Mediafire. Ya gun got dust in it from not bustin' it!

Big Scoob - Kryptonite
(From Kryptonite 12" single; 2000)



Be rude to leave you without another Big Scoob song to step to, so here's the lesser known U Got It. Scoob on some I Got It Made braggin' & boastin' over a certain Bobby Byrd break. U know the proto-Top Shelf 8/8/'88 steez.

Big Scoob - U Got It
(From U Got It single; 2002)



Anyone got an MP3 of Scoob's Say It Loud? Never heard it meself, but it could be cool if it's a JB sample.

Sunday, 19 June 2022

Did somebody say just Eat?

"It's so good it's magical, lemme put a spell on you
I know you got a n*gga, baby girl I ain't gon' tell on you
I don't need no honey pack, I don't pop no f*ckin' percs
Hit that ass from 9 to 5, lemme get that f*ckin' work"


Eatem ft. BR Cowboy - Magical
(From Magical single; 2022)



You know how Homeboy Sandman's Talking (Bleep) is just Conjugal Visit To The Prison Of The Mind re-tweaked with rhymes about pet peeves and a hook made from a wah-wah guitar sample? Eatem's Magical follows a similar trajectory: it's just Go Get Yo' F*ckin Brotha re-tweeked with rhymes about "your girlfriend" and a hook made from the BR Cowboy restaurant jingle & Russ Meyer sex EFX. No shotz @ Sandman or Eatem because there's nowt wrong with that in either instance - craftily re-tweaking your own songs is the 7th element of Rap music.

Props to Eatem's producer/former Down Bad member Mike Sneezy for making the aforementioned Russ Meyer sex EFX sound like Herbie Hancock's Watermelon Man. I'm not a Jazz guy, but I've loved that shit ever since I first heard it soundtracking Guy Mariano's G.O.A.T Sk8 video part.

You wanna go down? Why not. I'll be like Matt and Han' you a cock.

Friday, 17 June 2022

Count Dukeula

Duke Deuce ft. Glorilla - Just Say That
(From CRUNKSTAR album; 2022)



Been waiting on this one since a snippet appeared last summer. It sounds as Transylvanian as expected but arrives with two pleasant surprises: a Glorilla cameo and Duke dressed in Beethoven garb like Biz Markie in the Just A Friend video. Hat tip to Duke and Eatem for bringing the fun back to hardbody Rap.

Tuesday, 14 June 2022

W Boogie Wit Da Dickies

Westside Boogie ft. DRAM - AIGHT
(From AIGHT single; 2022)



This has to be the first good Shady Records single since... since.... since..... who even knows? AIGHT's appeal: it inadvertently sounds like Nef The Pharoah made a Kendrick Lamar song. Or rather, it's some Siccness.net type shit unintentionally disguised as some HotNewHipHop.com type shit. A happy accident where Big Tymin' meets Big Steppers.

DRAM changed his name to Shelley FKA DRAM but let's not indulge him. Son, you're DRAM AKA the Cha Cha guy.

Monday, 13 June 2022

My Mind Spray 3.5

Can I say shit? Do it for Matthew Africa, do it for Gary Warnett.

It's no coincidence that E-40 and Boosie's music both took a turn for the worse when they stopped wearing premium LVC Levi's jeans and switched to ugly distressed Eurotrash denim with ridges on the knees. You can't be an American outlaw when you're dressed like a Spanish footballer.

Hurricane Chris is making a comeback via a Jersey Club remix of Ay Bay Bay that's blown up on TikTok. Personally, I can't wait until the Jersey Club community discover ReUp Reedy's For That Dick.

Hyperpop is just Chicago Bop for posh people and paedophiles. You can't tell me shit to the contrary because A.G Cook & all them P.C Music toffs had never heard Rap music until Fact Magazine posted a Sicko Mobb video. I also betcha 100 Gecs had never heard Rap music until Pitchfork reviewed DJ Moondawg's We Invented The Bop Vol. 1 mixtape.

For decades, "yeah, but it bangs on the dancefloor tho!" was a mostly accurate gauge for judging Rap music. Then KanYe Pest's Stronger made it an unreliable barometer before Drake's career and Godawful shite like A$AP Ferg's Shabba rendered it an utterly useless measuring stick.

When you're in the pub watching a football match on BT Sport there's no better feeling than drowning out Glenn Hoddle's colour commentary with some Biggie classics off the pub's jukebox. Thereby replacing the unpleasant sound of a man talkin' shit with the pleasant sound of a man shit talkin'.

One for the Britz: Dave East's music is the Rap equivalent of Michael Owen's punditry.

Friday, 10 June 2022

There's Consequences to this shit

"Goin' through shit, that's a part of life
Growin' through shit, that's the part I like"


Consequence - Blood Stain
(From Blood Stain single; 2022)



The return of Rap's official G.O.A.T weed carrier (though he was none too pleased to accept the title.) And over a KanYe Pest beat which is hard enough to rattle Consequence's proto-Rylan dentures. Surprisingly good, but maybe I shouldn't be so surprised since Cons rapping over KanYe production has been a G.O.O.D Combination™ since their pre-College Dropout back-and-forths like The Good, The Bad, The Ugly and Take It As A Loss. Plus, can't forget the ultimate solo ConYe track which doubles as one of the best The 'Hood Done Took Me Under (Its Wing) songs of the 2000s.

Consequence - Don't Forget 'Em
(From Don't Quit Your Day Job album; 2007)



**EDIT** added the Blood Stain video because it features Consequence practicing blackbelt-level Rap Hands on a Martian beach. Makes sense he has a such a strong Rap-Hands game because the first video he ever appeared in was the Rap-Hands equivalent of Citizen Kane.

Monday, 6 June 2022

I'm a graffiti artist - paint, chalk, outline

"First I tell 'em, where I want it done
In his backyard right in front of his son
Then I tell 'em, where to drop him off
In the Chattahoochie with his dick chopped off
Yeah, it sounds harsh, but it's well deserved
Feed his ass to the Sharks for hors d'oeuvres
No remorse, and no pity
This could happen to you in New Joc City"


Yung Joc - A Couple Grand
(From the Atlanta underground; 2006)



File this under 'beatjacks which are better than the originals.' Yung Joc was always more of a Juvenile than a Jeezy and his flow on this shit is pure New Orleans. I remember Rey turning his nose up at Yung Joc's Bad Boy Records debut album like "I prefer his underground shit" and this beatjack of Shawty Lo's I'm Da Man is Joc's equivalent of Mase's pre-Bad Boy Murda Ma$e Children Of The Corn material. Cot-damn, this song is wicked and plz believe that's wicked meaning evil. If there's a Hell below then Joc is possibly gonna go as a result of this one.

In Shawn Prez's recent VladTV interview with Yung Joc, Joc mentions a pre-Bad Boy local hit of his called Thousand Ones. Alas the only trace I can find of it online is in a Billboard magazine article. Anyone got the MP3?

Friday, 3 June 2022

New York's alright if you like slam-poetry elevator muzak

P-Lo ft. Larry June - Good
(From Good single; 2022)



First new P-Lo single of 2022. Conclusive proof that Bay Area Rap is one of the only sources of Real Hip-Hop™ left: there's more scratching on this than there is on any New York Rap song of 2022.

Bonus beats: lemme put 5 on it with a quinary of quality. Mini playlist of my top 5 favourite NorCal Rap songs of 2022 so far. I'm bumpin' Young Jr, Seiji Oda and Ezale like duh duh duh, plus Stunnaman02 & Lil' Kayla like duh duh duh, and A-Wax's Woodie homage like duh duh duh.

Young Jr - Bird Walk
Seiji Oda - WAKE UP
Ezale - Ironic
Stunnaman02 ft. Lil' Kayla - Roll Wit It
A-Wax - Streets Callin'

Tuesday, 31 May 2022

Generic list post: May 2022

My m8 caught Monkeypox. Luckily the doctor has gibbon him a strong chance of a full recovery.
Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when the Rap internet gave me a headache. A battle of (half)wits between "you MUST listen to Kendrick Lamar" guys and "I DON'T listen to Kendrick Lamar" guys. Personally, I need Silent Hill to be Lamar's next single so I can continue to call him the highfalutin Kid Ink: a good singles rapper who makes tediously bloated albums.

6 Shot - Cutthroat (2001)
Seiji Oda - Like This (album version) (2022)
Eatem - Cup Of Tea (2022)
Hitkidd & Glorilla - FNF (Let's Go) (2022)
Kendrick Lamar ft. Kodak Black - Silent Hill (2022)
Benzz - Je M'appelle (2022)
Knucks ft. SL - Nice & Smooth (2022)
Mr. Fingers - Coastline Paradox (2022)
Martin Slavin - Space Adventures Part 2 (1966)

Other notables: Phat Baby's Proper Play is a good bad-energy song; Kenzo B's Bump It might be the most notable Pulp Fiction soundtrack-core song since Hollywood Holt's The Show; Husalah's new song is more like an intro than a single; the same is true of Nef The Pharoah's Tattooed which could have been super sick if he'd bothered to turn it into a proper song.

Other stuff: peep me on Rap's G.O.A.T lost loosies. Also peep Party Sparty on his favourite movie soundtrack songs from 1957 to 2020 and Caroline Munro's best movie roles.

Monday, 30 May 2022

Phatman Returns Part 2

"Look in the sky - it's a bird, it's a plane, no it's his soul
Tell the doctor the pallbearer put ya picture on they clothes"


Phat Baby - Proper Play (FWS)
(From Profit Off My Pain album; 2022)



It seems like Baton Rouge caught the holy ghost of Lil' Phat judging by Eatem's recent homage and this Phat Baby single. Damn, this shit is colder than the White Witch of Narnia's tit. A good bad-energy song with murder raps so foul I need to listen to something positive and wholesome afterwards to restore my moralbiotic balance. Ricky D to the rescue:

"So listen, be strong, scream whoopee-doo
Go for yours 'cause dreams come true
And you'll make your mommy so so proud of you too
And this is a message that the Ruler Rick threw"


Slick Rick - Hey Young World
(From The Great Adventures Of Slick Rick album; 1988)



PS: Instagram informs me that LL Cool J's Bigger and Deffer album was 35 years old yesterday. To celebrate can we get his performance of Go Cut Creator Go on Saturday Night Live back on YouTube?

Saturday, 28 May 2022

Larry Heard 'Em Say

Mr. Fingers - Coastline Paradox
(From Around The Sun album; 2022)



That's me the first time I heard this new Larry track. Talk about a Coastline Paradox - I started seein' Saturn in Blackpool. House music all life long in this solar system.

Thursday, 26 May 2022

2-17 'til Infinity

Mr. 2-17 - Strong Arm Flexxin'
(From Know What I'm Sayin' Pt 2 mixtape; 2014)



I want to live in a world where people love Strong Arm Flexxin' as much as Walked In. The two G.O.A.T plink-plink-plonk piano Swag-Rap songs of the 2010s and Mr. 2-17 produced the pair of them. Might start a petition to get 1Up Society's Strong Arm Flexxin' dance video reuploaded to YouTube.

Tuesday, 24 May 2022

Glorillas In The Midst

Hitkidd & Glorilla - FNF (Let's Go)
(From FNF (Let's Go) single; 2022)



He's The producer, she's the rapper. Some insanely 'ard Memphis shit that's best described as BlocGal JB or Daisy Deuce. Found this via Yung Cat's remix of it dissing his baby-mamma & her new boyfriend.

Yung Cat - I'm Outside TBF (FNF remix)
(From YouTube; 2022)


Monday, 23 May 2022

In The Woods

"Bossed up but I'm still bummy
Say you real, yeah, that's real funny
You ain't fam, can't get shit from me
All 2020 finna go dummy"


Seiji Oda - Like This
(From the internet; 2020 + lofi // HYPHY album; 2022)



Finally one of Seiji Oda's best songs has a video. One of his most important songs too since AERO, Like This and BLUE were the genesis of his golden hour gentle giggin' sound. As for the video, it's all about that green for them Boyz-n-the-Wood. A lotta these new NorCal rappers' whole style is outdated, f*ck being hard, Seiji Oda is conservation-orientated.

Bonus beats: where's the WAKE UP video at? Your favourite rapper would never have the vision to drop the top and ventilate their third eye with a visor bucket hat.


Seiji brought a whole different odour to Bay Area Rap, ya smell me? It's some Yin & Ylang-Ylang cosmic harmony: burnin' rubber holdin' choppas whilst burnin' Nag Champa realigning his seven chakras. Or sumfink lol.

Wednesday, 18 May 2022

Generic list post: G.O.A.T lost loosies

Martibus is back up in a room with 1000 candles lit, meditating on this Rap shit. Who's down to talk G.O.A.T lost loosies? Let's define lost loosies as songs which have never appeared on any album/mixtape/EP and have never made it to any DSP or MP3 store. What we're looking for here is MP3s from the Zshare/Hulkshare/Digital Dripped eras, MySpace page tracks, YouTube-only singles, original versions which remain in official purgatory, Soundcloud exclusives, and songs from stupid rare boutique vinylz 7" singles which have unofficially found their way online. Here's some personal favourites.

Black Rob - New York (2006)
The Jacka - Heavy Rain (2007)
Max B - Take A Flick (2007)
YG - Aim Me (2008)
3 Deep - Say What I Wanna Say (2008)
Prodigy - Raining Guns & Shanks (2008)
Jackie Chain ft. Jhi-Ali - Rollin' (O.G version) (2008)
Witchdoctor - Rich & Poor (2009)
ABN - Rain (O.G version) (2008)
Crime Mob - What Is Love? (2008)
The Cool Kids ft. Lil' Wayne - Gettin' It (2008)
Lil' Boosie - Top To The Bottom (2009)
Beeda Weeda - Bassrock Babies (O.G version) (2010)
Consequence - Alphabet Boys (2010)
Fam-Lay ft. Project Pat - Money Makin' Trick (2011)
King Louie - We Like To Party (2011)
Fat Trel - Rolling (2011)
Mic Terror - Heaux Love Me (2012)
Pablo Skywalkin - All Facts (2013)
K Kutta - Lum Lum (O.G version) (2013)
Kurious - Best In The World (2014)
Lil' Chris - Gods Crying (2015)
22nd Letter - Blunt On Me (2015)
MF DOOM & Madlib - Avalanche (2016)
White Gzus ft. GLC - G Is For Green (2016)
OMB Peezy - Loyalty Over Love (2017)
Lil' Wayne - Dinnertime (2007/2017)
Ya Boy Big Choo - Halloween Beat (2017)
Flo Milli - White Girl Mia (2018)
Edan - Real Bad Promo (2018)
Valee - Allat (2018)
Eatem ft. Lil' Larry - Hit Da Drink Twice (2019)
Seiji Oda - House Shoes (2021)
Homeboy Sandman - Yup, Do It! (2021)

Shine some light on your favourites, folks - don't let shit go dark here. The type of dark that makes a house haunted, the type of dark that bloggers get lost in, the type of dark you fear when you dead in a coffin.

Monday, 16 May 2022

Nice & Good, not Nice & Smooth

"You already know what the brand is, so overlooked but they don't understand it
But understand I'm a bandit, I'm takin' their Lamb and I'm makin' a banquet"


Knucks ft. SL - Nice & Good
(From Alpha Place album; 2022)



On one hand, this is a MOBO Award winner type U.K Drill song. On the other hand, I like the London Posse type back-and-forth between Knucks & SL over the Pot Noodle Western high noon stare-down production. Verdict: I ain't gonna front on this tune just because Knucks is an Alexis Petridis-bait artist. Bonus points for avoiding my biggest pet peeve with U.K Rap - British men using the words feds and bando.

Okay, that's quite enough U.K choonz for now..... unless J Hus drops some hot new shit, natch.

Thursday, 12 May 2022

Stunted Taylor

Lil' Chris - God Crying
(From the internet; 2015)



In the popular parlance of the youth, this shit still floats. Tropical rainforest riddim polyphonic Rap. Lil' Chris' best song imho and I might even go as far as saying that it's a top ten lost loosie of last decade. It's a pity Lil' Chris is remembered for Bop Like Me because it wasn't even his best Bop song let alone his best song full stop. Obviously Lil' Chris should be remembered for songs like Gods Crying, Same Shit, Different Day and Bad Lil' Chick instead.

Lil' Chris - Same Shit, Different Day
(From the internet; 2012)



Lil' Chris - Bad Lil' Chick
(From Made It Thru The Struggle mixtape; 2015)



For better and for worse, "pussy smell good like detergent" is a lyric which is forever imprinted onto my brain. Chicago's equivalent of "she cook, she clean, never smell like onion rings" or wot?

Monday, 9 May 2022

Benzz or Beaker

Benzz - Je M'appelle
(From Je M'appelle single; 2022)



Hit up my m8's bar this past weekend and the DJ was playing big U.K Drill choonz. The younger patrons loved that shit, but it's the driest music in the world to me, especially when you hear multiple songs with THAT annoying flow in a row. So when the DJ played Benzz's Je M'appelle it was like finding a Strawberry Split in the Sahara desert. As with HAZEY's Packs and Potions, U.K Drill only makes sense to me when it breaks free from THAT annoying flow over beats which sound like they were produced by Donae'O. Okay, it's a Destination Calibria sample on Je M'appelle, but it sounds like Donae'O made a riddim with it dunnit?

One of the main things U.K Drill and New York Drill have in common is that they're both best when they embrace the fact that they're glorified novelty Rap. That's why WAKA and Beeper are the best N.Y Drill choonz no competition.