Friday, 15 May 2026

More, more, more!

Duke Deuce - Feathers Up
(From Feathers Up single; 2026)


70th Street Carlos' new single is so moreish, I need another song with similar berserker energy like now and shit, y'know, that shit now, I'm talkin' now. Alas, I don't have Cooky Puss' number, so I gave Duke Deuce a call and got him to pop back up with a real Memphis slobberknocker of a song. Cot-damn, he could beat Andre The Giant with this track. Giant Gonzalez too.

Thursday, 14 May 2026

BOATs and hoes

Trim - BOAT (live performance)
(From Audio Exhbit YouTube channel; 2026)


People have been mocking that Trim bird's live performance at the Rolling Loud festival. Which is ironic to me because thee definitive version of her break out song BOAT isn't the studio version or the remixes with YKNiece & BunnaB or Pooh Shiesty, it's this performance of it on the Audio Exhbit YouTube channel. She nails the timing and delivery, and her voice sounds better all natural without any studio trickery. You can't tell me nuffink to the contrary.

Some of my most-listened to Rap songs in 2026 are songs from 2025: Make Her Gig by Ezale, Disco Kryptonite by Newcleus, That's A Playa by Young Bari & BossLife Big Spence, No Lie by OnlyHeaven, and BOAT right here. Like Styles P nearly said, I don't care about the release date and whenever it dropped, I don't care about anything except the song being in my rotation because it's hot.

Wednesday, 13 May 2026

Berserker Bounce back!

70th Street Carlos - Get Out The Way
(From Get Out The Way single; 2026)


Boosie FatAzz caught a second wind off the second line. Legitimately thought this was a 2016/2017 Carlos song when I first clocked it: the Webbiefro is back in full bloom and the beat sounds like it could be a Trel Itz A Hit production. 'Los is back in that water like LL Cool J's parrot.

Monday, 11 May 2026

You don't wanna lose me like new I.D

Cool Kids ft. Lil' Wayne - Gettin' It
(From the internet; 2008)


I'm stickin' to the script like java when I say that Gettin' It still sounds hotter than lava. A very necessary rearrangement of Jam-Master Jay after Nas stunk the original beat up with his nauseating sex rhymes when he jacked it for You Know My Style. Gettin' It is such a message in a bottle from the Blog Era™ innit? The Cool Kids did their thing for 2 16s before Lil' Wayne came through and gaffled the song with 3 verses. Gettin' It was a loosie which was never released to retail and has still never made it to DSPs, but the MP3 went platinum on Hulkshare.

My favourite Cool Kids memory: Will High being absolutely disgusted by Mikey Rocks' skinny jeans in the Black Mags video. Absolute fury from a bloke who hadn't even listened to music made by blk ppl since 1999. My other favourite Cool Kids nemory: Mikey Rocks blowing my mind and my laptop speakers at the SAME DAMN TIME when I first heard it on MySpace in 2007. It was, to paraphrase Jason Fox, new school Rap with an old school steelo.

Cool Kids - Mikey Rocks
(From the internet; 2007/The Bake Sale album; 2008)


Even more importantly than that, the Cool Kids MySpace page led me to discover future Martorialist favourite/Chicago's best kept secret Mic Terror via Cold As Hell and Juke Them Hoes. Shout out to Tom Anderson, the only tech-bloke social media entrepreneur who made the world a better place and then dipped with that Murdoch money.

Saturday, 9 May 2026

My Mind Spray 21

Beastie Boys - Looking Down The Barrel Of A Gun
(From Paul's Boutique album; 1989)


One of the greatest mini-moments in Rap music: that 2 thump drum breakdown at 1:49 in Looking Down The Barrel Of A Gun. It lasts barely 2 seconds, but it hits like a cattle prod to my body and turns me into Busta in the Everything Remains Raw intro to the Woo-Hah video.

The Assembly - Mob Throb
(From The Assembly album; 2026)


The Assembly is a new Sic Wid It group comprising of E-40, Cousin Fik & Hitta Slim FKA Laroo T.H.H. DJ Fresh's mob musik synths on this song are so high-pitched they could be used as a dog whistle for missing pooches. High praise or wot?

Wednesday, 6 May 2026

Mýa Jammer

Mýa ft. Too $hort - Just A Little Bit
(From Just A Little Bit single; 2026)


This ain't Gina G, motherf**kers! $hort and Mýa go back like babies and pacifiers? Most unexpected collaboration of 2026 so far or wot? This song sounds like it could have dropped at any point in the last 30 years and that's why it's so good. Throwback R&Boogie which NorCal's electric-boogalooing fonky-grampa OG Mike Chaos can strut his stuff to. This shit is so Grown & Gorgeous™ that $hort even put a suit and tie on for the video.

Monday, 4 May 2026

Vince FM

Vincent Gallo - Drowning In Brown
(From Buffalo '66 soundtrack; 1998)


Drowning In Brown from Vincent Gallo's Buffalo '66 soundtrack is the best Check Your Head instrumental interlude which the Beastie Boys never recorded. Someone should interview Gallo and ask him about his favourite early 80s Rap songs from the Prince Vince era. What was he listening to on this boombox in 1982 when he was drowning in baby-blue? Definitely Spoonie Gee, but who else and which songs specifically?


Juiceboxxx really missed a trick by not rhyming over Drowning In Brown one time like 'Clef on the Fugees joint. Speaking of 'boxxx, Like A Maniac is up there with Lifestyles Of The Rich And Infamous by Ice-T and Touring by the Ramones in my personal canon of Songs About Life On The Road. On the air guitar-ometer, Like A Maniac scores a Bill & Ted "EXCELLENT!"

Juiceboxxx - Like A Maniac
(From Heartland 99 album; 2015)

Friday, 1 May 2026

Dance To My Misandry

Bri3 - Whatever
(From Whatever single; 2026)


The golden-era era of Hateful Hoe Rap singles continues with this song by Maryland's Bri3. Definitely wasn't expecting a cheeky Heavy D sample in a 2026 song. The overly critical hater's in the house! Give me more professionally A&R-ed Rap singles and less 74 second brainfart throwaway tracks.

Bonus beats: Seiji Oda brought the Trunk Boiz back again. A cool breeze on the boombox of AM radio bubblegum Hyphy. If I ruled the world this song would be the Steal My Sunshine of 2026.

Seiji Oda & Trunk Boiz - Go Dumb!
(From Go Dumb! twingle; 2026)