Monday, 11 May 2026

You don't wanna lose me like new I.D

Cool Kids ft. Lil' Wayne - Gettin' It
(From the internet; 2008)


I'm stickin' to the script like java when I say that Gettin' It still sounds hotter than lava. A very necessary rearrangement of Jam-Master Jay after Nas stunk the original beat up with his nauseating sex rhymes when he jacked it for You Know My Style. Gettin' It is such a message in a bottle from the Blog Era™ innit? The Cool Kids did their thing for 2 16s before Lil' Wayne came through and gaffled the song with 3 verses. Gettin' It was a loosie which was never released to retail and has still never made it to DSPs, but the MP3 went platinum on Hulkshare.

My favourite Cool Kids memory: Will High being absolutely disgusted by Mikey Rocks' skinny jeans in the Black Mags video. Absolute fury from a bloke who hadn't even listened to music made by blk ppl since 1999. My other favourite Cool Kids nemory: Mikey Rocks blowing my mind and my laptop speakers at the SAME DAMN TIME when I first heard it on MySpace in 2007. It was, to paraphrase Jason Fox, new school Rap with an old school steelo.

Cool Kids - Mikey Rocks
(From the internet; 2007/The Bake Sale album; 2008)


Even more importantly than that, the Cool Kids MySpace page led me to discover future Martorialist favourite/Chicago's best kept secret Mic Terror via Cold As Hell and Juke Them Hoes. Shout out to Tom Anderson, the only tech-bloke social media entrepreneur who made the world a better place and then dipped with that Murdoch money.

Saturday, 9 May 2026

My Mind Spray 21

Beastie Boys - Looking Down The Barrel Of A Gun
(From Paul's Boutique album; 1989)


One of the greatest mini-moments in Rap music: that 2 thump drum breakdown at 1:49 in Looking Down The Barrel Of A Gun. It lasts barely 2 seconds, but it hits like a cattle prod to my body and turns me into Busta in the Everything Remains Raw intro to the Woo-Hah video.

The Assembly - Mob Throb
(From The Assembly album; 2026)


The Assembly is a new Sic Wid It group comprising of E-40, Cousin Fik & Hitta Slim FKA Laroo T.H.H. DJ Fresh's mob musik synths on this song are so high-pitched they could be used as a dog whistle for missing pooches. High praise or wot?

Wednesday, 6 May 2026

Mýa Jammer

Mýa ft. Too $hort - Just A Little Bit
(From Just A Little Bit single; 2026)


This ain't Gina G, motherf**kers! $hort and Mýa go back like babies and pacifiers? Most unexpected collaboration of 2026 so far or wot? This song sounds like it could have dropped at any point in the last 30 years and that's why it's so good. Throwback R&Boogie which NorCal's electric-boogalooing fonky-grampa OG Mike Chaos can strut his stuff to. This shit is so Grown & Gorgeous™ that $hort even put a suit and tie on for the video.

Monday, 4 May 2026

Vince FM

Vincent Gallo - Drowning In Brown
(From Buffalo '66 soundtrack; 1998)


Drowning In Brown from Vincent Gallo's Buffalo '66 soundtrack is the best Check Your Head instrumental interlude which the Beastie Boys never recorded. Someone should interview Gallo and ask him about his favourite early 80s Rap songs from the Prince Vince era. What was he listening to on this boombox in 1982 when he was drowning in baby-blue? Definitely Spoonie Gee, but who else and which songs specifically?


Juiceboxxx really missed a trick by not rhyming over Drowning In Brown one time like 'Clef on the Fugees joint. Speaking of 'boxxx, Like A Maniac is up there with Lifestyles Of The Rich And Infamous by Ice-T and Touring by the Ramones in my personal canon of Songs About Life On The Road. On the air guitar-ometer, Like A Maniac scores a Bill & Ted "EXCELLENT!"

Juiceboxxx - Like A Maniac
(From Heartland 99 album; 2015)

Friday, 1 May 2026

Dance To My Misandry

Bri3 - Whatever
(From Whatever single; 2026)


The golden-era era of Hateful Hoe Rap singles continues with this song by Maryland's Bri3. Definitely wasn't expecting a cheeky Heavy D sample in a 2026 song. The overly critical hater's in the house! Give me more professionally A&R-ed Rap singles and less 74 second brainfart throwaway tracks.

Bonus beats: Seiji Oda brought the Trunk Boiz back again. A cool breeze on the boombox of AM radio bubblegum Hyphy. If I ruled the world this song would be the Steal My Sunshine of 2026.

Seiji Oda & Trunk Boiz - Go Dumb!
(From Go Dumb! twingle; 2026)

Thursday, 30 April 2026

Generic list post: April 2026

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when that annoying pseud Mark Fisher wasn't here to see his annoying rapist hero Rustle Brand's implosion.

Me & My Cousin - My Day (1996)
Egyptian Lover - Vocoder Jam (2025)
6WA - Who Dunnit (2026)
Homeboy Sandman & Luke Warmth - Heet (2026)
BunnaB - Best Bitch (2026)
Sexyy Red - All Da Hoes (2026)
Nine & Dex - White Boy Wasted (2026)
The IT - Mr. Gone (Fingers Edit) (2026)
Mr. Fingers - Replicate (2026)
Ace - How Long (1974)

Bonus bloggin: 1nce again I'm gonna use my monthly wrap-up post to keep track of the best movies and TV shows I've been watching. * indicates rewatches dunnit.

Movies I watched and liked:
The Most Dangerous Game (1932)
Odd Man Out (1946) *
The Siege of Sidney Street (1960)
An American Werewolf In London (1981) *
License To Drive (1988) *

TV shows I watched and liked:
Doctor Who - The Daleks' Master Plan (5 episodes) (1965/1966)
The Capture (series 3 new episodes) (2026)
Mastermind (semi finals + grand final) (2026)
Real Madrid vs. Bayern Munich (2026)
Bayern Munich vs. Real Madrid (2026)
Mainz vs. Bayern Munich (2026)
PSG vs. Bayern Munich (2026)
Athletico Madrid vs Arsenal (2026)

Other notables: listen to my Martorialist classics not on DSPs and revamped Eatem's Greatest Pressure playlists.

Tuesday, 28 April 2026

Great song from a forgotten Rap album

Me & My Cousin - My Day
(From International album; 1996)



As featured in ur boi's recent Martorialist classics not on DSPs playlist. Me & My Cousin were a Solano Country, California duo who began their career in 1992 as Kriss Kross' older brothers, but then found their final form in 1996 when they transformed into the Luniz' long-lost siamese twins after hooking up with Ruthless Records G-Funk royalty Rhythm D for their only album International. Smooth was the album's main single and, fair play, it's a cool song. But it ain't nowhere near as cool as My Day where Rhythm D G-Funkified Shaggy's Boombastic for the lads to get their Hot Sunny Day on. G-Funk and Mob Musik mixing like Amaretto and spicy Rum.

Saturday, 25 April 2026

09 til Infinity (part 5)

"Yes I got a man, but Ima send my best bitch
Most important meal, he gon' eat her out for breakfast"


BunnaB - Best Bitch
(From Best Bitch single; 2026)


Chef's kiss opening lyric up top. Another jam from the Atlanta Swag-Rap reboot's Dame of Disrespect. Me, I'm gonna use this as a companion to Bestie by Pooh The WriteR.