Monday 30 September 2019

Generic list post: September 2019

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when world's kept colliding in ever more unexpected ways. If only Jacob Rees-Mogg would take a nap on the third rail.

Eatem - Whoop Sum (2019)
BlocBoy JB - It's Bloc (2019)
Laroo THH ft. E-40 - HOG (2019)
Rio Da Young OG - Legendary (2019)
DJ Deeon - Point 'Em Out (1996)
Calvin Harris ft. Rag 'n' Bron Son - Giant (2019)

Other notables: couldn't even blame J. Cole for the "new" Gang Starr single being a snoozefest; as long as there's breath in my lungs I'ma opine that Milano has never topped Rep For The Slums, but Boulevard Author is close; Dungeon Family's Intentions could have been a new Follow The Light if Big Boi had given more sing-time to Sleepy Brown rather than That Weirdo Rapist Cee-Lo™; Wiz & YG's Shouldn't Matter flipping the G.O.A.T Paul Weller song is another example of world's colliding in ever more unexpected ways.

Related: why couldn't God have taken Sean Spicer rather than Jimmy Spicer?

Saturday 28 September 2019

Why couldn't God have taken Sean Spicer rather than Jimmy Spicer?

Breaker one, breaker two, Jimmy Spicer just died so let's make like Jeckyll & Hyde and do the do. Telephone or tell a friend that Jimmy was laying down "crazy space shit that don't even make no sense" on wax three years before Rammellzee's Beat Bop. When Spicer Magnetic claimed "planet Rhyme On is my place of birth" on Adventures Of Super Rhyme, it's not so much a boast as an explanation of how he appeared ex nihilo as Rap's first eccentric on wax. 1983's Money (Dollar Bill Y'all) is rightfully lauded as Jimmy's masterpiece, but it's his 1980 debut that cemented him as Rap's king of the yakety yak yard. For twelve minutes Jimmy the raconteur travels across time, space, Transylvania & Studio 54 in four different voices flipping labyrinthine storytelling rhymes to sound like freestyled stream-of-consciousness one minute, and then flipping clearly-improvised ad libs to sound like finely-honed writtens the next.

Jimmy Spicer - Adventures Of Super Rhyme
(From Adventures Of Super Rhyme 12"; 1980)

As well as being Rap's original oddball, Jimmy was also the first Rapper who didn't even need to release an album - why bother to record an LP when you've already dropped a couple of 10/10 timeless classic 12" singles with "more rhymes than a clock got chimes"? Jimmy Spicer: kinda like Jay Electronica, only actually good.

R.I.P to the O.G Super M.C. May your soul rhyme & roll in steree-eree-o forever ever.

Thursday 26 September 2019

Laroo like Danny

"That's his name? Or is it a nom de plume?"

Let's not even indulge Laroo's silly midlife-crisis rebrand as Hitta Slim. Instead, let's celebrate that he's found NorCal's two biggest blap-tremendo productions of 2019 thus far and consequently dropped his two best singles since 20 Bricks and Dip Wit' U. Laroo himself remains as serviceable as ever, but these tracks got the proverbial heavy tails like killer whales.

Laroo THH ft. E-40 - HOG
(From YouTube; 2019)

Laroo THH - Dog Lane
(From YouTube; 2019)

3 rules Rappers gotta follow if they expect anyone to take their rebrand seriously: they must flip their whole personality (Zev Luv X to MF DOOM), their O.G moniker must be commercially-doomed when attempting to launch a solo career (Tity Boi to 2 Chainz), or they must change their name early within the first 6 months of their career (WNC Carlos to 70th Street Carlos.)

Tuesday 24 September 2019

MT Plays It Cool

"She love me long time 'cause I'm so special
She holdin' me and cryin' and she won't let go
Bad things come to an end sorta like Eckō, FUBU, and No Limit Apparel
Tell that n*gga Wale that we serious about our Harold's
Say somethin' 'bout Sharks and n*gga's gonna see the barrels"

Mic Terror - Heaux Love Me
(From YouTube; 2012)

File this under 'underrated jams which will feature in ya boy's Best Rap Songs of the 2010s list.' Cleo's Apartment by Marvin Gaye was always destined to be flipped into some fly Midwesternplayalistichickenshopmuzik and BJ The Chicago Kid clearly agreed. Word around Chi-Town, Drew Barber banned Mic Terror from the FakeShoreDrive office after he dissed Master P's clothing line on this song.

Bonus beats: another underrated 2012 Chicago jam which'll also feature in ya boy's end-of-the-decade list. Same energy as Heaux Love Me, but with a twist of TREE's Soul Trap™. Great unintentional video moment at 1:11 when one of the Windy City's infamous gusts blows Giftz man's cap right offa his head. His hat, it done took flight!

"Whip so sick I don't need to chain
2 white girls I don't need no 'caine, mane
Bitch so lame I don't need no game
Glock so big I don't need no gang
18 shots I don't need no aim
Cops roll round I ain't gon' slang
You can just call me Nino, mane"

Young Giftz ft. TREE - Nino
(From YouTube; 2012)

Thursday 19 September 2019

Hard To Care

Who gives a fuck about a new Gang Starr album comprised of unused Baldhead Slick-era Guru acapellas bolted onto a bunch of 2019 Primo beats when you can just listen to the G.O.A.T Gang Starr deeeeeep cut 14 times in a row instead?

Gang Starr - Doe In Advance (O.G version)
(From Hard To Earn sessions; 1994/12" single; 2000)

Wonder if Gang Starr even have any unreleased tracks? Primo would have had a fairly good idea what samples he couldn't get cleared, and most Rap groups back in't day just recorded what they needed to fill an album/12" single/soundtrack placement.

Remember when Guru was rumoured to be in a relationship with DJ Solar as was rumoured in the years leading up to his death? If the erstwhile MC Keithy E was gonna indulge in some arse-play with another bloke then he deserved a gay DJ on the level of Mister Cee as opposed to some shitty glorified Soundclick producer.

Wednesday 18 September 2019

It's so rowdy in the Rouge part 2

1989 Stezo lives on in Eatem's acid-wash denim dungarees. Eatem is for the children (no Skullduggery) which is why he's bringing that Baton Rouge Brawl Music™ to high school pep rallys. I'm more of a Hit Da Drink Twice (Martorialist Edit) man meself, but I respect that Whoop Sum is Eatem's song currently goin' viral in the 70815 because Whoopin' is eternal like E. 1999.

"If I ain't never smoke a blunt and skip a class witcha
If I ain't never fuck a bitch and get a bag witcha
Then I ain't finna hit the club and act an ass witcha"

Eatem - Whoop Sum
(From the internet; 2019)

Monday 16 September 2019

Martorialist Elegance: Put Ya Filas On!

No dancer, b - R.I.P Trouble T
Fila rock, kill a cop
2Pac's kinda like Steady B.

My m8 Chinese John just got back from Cuba and said he saw 2Pac rockin' a pair of them Spice Girl lookin' Fila Disruptor IIs.

Saturday 14 September 2019

Clear & Present Ginger Part 2

Calvin Harris ft. Rag 'n' Bron Son - Giant
(From some upcoming Calvin Harris album; 2019)

David Zowie's House Every Weekend's reign on top was long like Calvin Harris' legs, but it's time we all accept that Giant has toppled Zowie's one moment of glory from its perch as the best ASOS Get The Look-House anthem of the 2010s. Youz see Calvin, Jimmy? The big wee bugger has got a funnel up his arse and a breeze between his ears, but in the past 12 months he's produced a banger for Donae'o, made Sam Smith listenable, and justified the existence of a Don't Flop rappa-ternt-sanga who's the Jihadi Jordan equivalent of Plan B meets Paul Shane.

True story, Giant's ten second crescendo from 3:09 to 3:19 never fails to make me wanna triumphantly pop off semi-automatic weapons into the sky like Stitches.

And then when the trumpet parps back up for the final chorus it's bare euphoric Boyz-on-RTE vybz.

One luv 2 Stephen Gately. Goodbye, Norma Jean...

Monday 9 September 2019

Spoonie TeeVee

Been watchin' some of JayQuan's other Foundation Lesson videos since I caught wind of his Errol "Pumpkin" Bedward overview and of course the Spoonie Gee one is my fave. There's some nice little nuggets of info for us Spoon Spoon Spoonie Stans, JayQuan's conversational tone of narration is a refreshing change from certain other Rap historian YouTubers who have the oratory skillz of Kevin Kilbane on Match of the Day, and Spoonie's story is wrapped up in the same amount of time it takes Lord Jamar to fume about poofters in a standard VladTV video.

Speakin' of Vlad, let's talk about this recent piece of quality journalism. China Mac? More like China's Packin' A Mac In The Front Of The AZN amirite.

Sunday 8 September 2019

B Section

"If I wasn't a felon I pro'lly woulda ran for the mayor
I can't get lost 'cause I got this cash, I make a money trail
What's for sale? I got junkies at the door from Delaware
Got a freaky bitch she walk around the house in underwear
Everytime I pull my dick out, man, your know her tongue is there"

BlocBoy JB - It's Bloc
(From YouTube; 2019)

Plz believe I'm using It's Bloc as the B-side to Mercedes. Reeeewind for my favourite BlocBoy JB song to date:

"John Wall, Wizard
Dan Buehler, kick ya
We don't shake no hands with the opposition, n*gga
LA Clipper
Eastside Cripper
Keep playin' with my dogs 'til I make 'em go and sic ya"

BlocBoy JB - Mercedes
(From I Am Me album; 2019)

Friday 6 September 2019

Khop the album when I drop it (or not)

Mr. Short Khop ft. Kokane - Dollaz, Drank & Dank
(From Da Khop Shop album; 2001)

Thumbs up like Bill Bixby to whoever it woz who put me onto this Battlecat bam-bam by Ice Cube's equivalent of Knoc-turn'al. Shit's properly clicked for me now to the point where I've blapped it thrice in a row every other day over the past couple of weeks. It's never been easier to dig for old music, but finding choonz you truly love remains as tricky as ever innit?

Kokane clearly borrowed X-Pac's Ric Flair wig for this video.

Sunday 1 September 2019

R.I.P to Pumpkin, I had to regulatte part 2

If you're unfamiliar with JayQuan then the best way to describe him would be Dart Adams minus the extreme autism/narcissism. Anyhoo, JQ's just dropped a Foundation lesson video on Rap's first super-producer Errol "Pumpkin" Bedward and it's the definitive breakdown of the O.G King Of The Beat's career. Proper sunday morning edutainment for zee seasoned Rap connoisseur.

Hat tip to the baby-mama champion O'Eardley for the head's up on this.