Monday 31 January 2022

Generic list post: January 2022

Traxamillion ft. Qing Qi - Big D
(From Sirens compilation; 2021)

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when Traxamillion left this mortal coil. Turns out that Trax really was "about the women" on his final compilation from last year. The Big D sure got around in 2021.

DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince - The Reverend (1989)
The Jacka - Heavy Rain (CDQ) (2007/2021)
Traxamillion - Spaceship (2008)
Homeboy Sandman - Come Thru (2016/2021)
Bruiser Wolf - Dope Game Stupid (2021)
Seiji Oda ft. Lil' Ricefield - Gasbreakdip (2021)
Seiji Oda - Pomegranite (2021)
YRB NY - Replace Me (2021)
Tony Shhnow - Sometimes (2021)
Tony Shhnow - Slow Crash (2022)
HAZEY - Packs and Potions (2022)

Other notables: I'm not too interested in A-Wax's current music but I can't resist that Freddy's Glove song; AZ went in over Larry Smith & Davy DMX's 1983 Oberheim drum track on Stay Fly; DaBoii probably paid an arm & a leg for that Gwen Stefani sample on Bananas so it's a pity he didn't maximise it and make something a bit more anthemic; cool to hear a Top Billin' sample on Blu's People Call Me Blu(e); I ain't tryna hear CeeFineAss making fake Detroit music.

PS: Party Sparty brought the baby blue to blogspot and started his own outpost to talk about movies, music, and music from movies. A good place to start is his Top 50 Blaxploitation soundtrack songs list. I'm the Martadoxical, he's the Spartvexical and it's an 'art attack like Neil Buchanan.

Saturday 29 January 2022

Plenty of Oda fish in the sea

"Iiiiii be talkin' slick, baby, don't slip
Iiiiii'll never snitch, Ima keep my shit zipped
Stop talkin' to me, quit wigglin' ya lips
Tryna block my shine, this isn't an eclipse
Give a f**k, I'm still grindin', feelin' like I'm Clipse
In the Bay it get grimey, get your shit bipped"

Seiji Oda ft. Lil' Ricefield - Gasbreakdip
(From 98 Corolla EP; 2021)

Sons Of The P? More like Sons Of The P-Lo amirite. Just two AZN bros bippin' a beat wide open with Snagglepuss flows. I love NorCal Rap because it's the only region which consistently produces songs you can cut a rug to. That said, I'm also feelin' Seiji in oceanic Zen Based Slap-Tranquilo mode. Much like a Japanese bathtub, my man has surprising depth.

"Don't panic, bitch, I'm still makin' bands in a pandemic
Diamonds dancin' panoramic
I got ya bitch panhandling my banana hammock"

Seiji Oda - Pomegranite
(From Pomegranite single; 2021)

Lil' Ricefield is a Helluva name. It's only a matter of time until an AZN NorCal rapper calls himself Chop Suey P. Newton.

Friday 28 January 2022

Late pass: He's The DJ, I'm The Vicar

DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince - The Reverend
(From And In This Corner... album; 1989)

This song could be a TEMPUR mattress the way I've slept on it. As far as late 80s jams built around vocal samples go, The Reverend belongs in the top 3 alongside LL Cool J's The Doo Wop and Nice & Smooth's Dope On A Rope. Plus, with that Mary Mary drum break it had the potential to be a Running Man classic. So why isn't this shit heralded as one of the best Jeff & Will album cuts? It's a mystery, Father Brown.

Random-Rap spods tend to be terrible cheerleaders for the Golden-Era because they'll turn their noses up at a killer Jazzy Jeff & Fresh Prince album track but spunk themselves silly over some mediocre obscure 12" by a 5th rate MC Shan clone. That's why 95% of vinyl purist blokes make useless music guides, and if you disagree then you can see deez.

PS: MC EZ & Troup's Get Retarded is disqualified from the late 80s jams built around vocal samples canon because it's Craig Mack doing the Zoom, Zoom, Zooming himself.

Tuesday 25 January 2022

Shhniz Khalifa part 2

"My face card clean, but my bitch body mean
She called me trampoline, she seen me jump up out them jeans"

Tony Shhnow - Slow Crash
(From Kill Streak 2 Deluxe album; 2022)

Yeah, I'm enjoying Tony Shhnow in this zoomer Wiz Khalifa zone of his. Not so much Kush & OJ as Kush & Kenny G. Sax and violence is a Good Combination™ and that's word to Zoot the king of toot.

Sunday 23 January 2022

Someday a real Rain will come...

... and that day is today because there's now a CDQ upload of Jacka's G.O.A.T loosie Heavy Rain on YouTube. For doz who slept, this was a MySpace song which never appeared on any of his albums but has lived on as a tinny rip on YouTube. You can't go wrong with a Jacka song which combines the rain and pointin' guns at enemies, so it's a blessing to finally hear this classic as it should be heard.

The Jacka - Heavy Rain (CDQ)
(From MySpace; 2007/YouTube; 2021)

Who'll make like the Skinny Boys and rip the cut to MP3? I dunno how to do dat dere ever since went to internet Heaven. I should know the ropes but you're gonna have to hold my hand.

**EDIT** Cheers to the Anonymous commenter for the rip tip. MP3 here.

Saturday 22 January 2022

Sands of time

"Talkin' out ya ass wasn't really the right look
If we'd had Tweets mighta caught a two piece and a right hook
Pen and pad turned into the path that my life took
Sometimes I been mistook for a halfway crook because I'm a book you can't judge by the cover
I worked 9 to 5 during the come-up
Yo, I even was a teacher which was cool because I got to wild during the summer
It been while since I got a shorty number and then took her to the roof to get a hummer"

Homeboy Sandman - Come Thru
(From the vaults; 2016/the internet; 2021)

Much prefer this late-2021 loosie to Sandman's new 2022 single tbh. My favourite Rap egghead on some Ahmad type shit - a Back In The Day jam on 3 different levels since it's an unreleased song from 2016 which kinda sounds like a lost Fondle 'Em Records single from 1999. There's scienz of life in the old dog yet.

Press this song up on the cheapest quality vinyl, stick a fake Fondle 'Em logo on it, and then sell it to Cousin Balki for £500. Now that's what I call a mug shot.

Thursday 20 January 2022

Them olders are washed like Sami Khedira

HAZEY - Packs and Potions
(From YouTube; 2022)

It's Anfield Rap, Jim, but not as we know it.

Never in a month of Sundays would I have predicted that my first favourite Rap song of 2022 would be some Scouse Drill by Tin 'Ead from Brookside. It seems like every British city got they own AITCH, so here's the kid HAZEY aka Lil' Durk Kuyt aka John Arne Lil' Reese. Fair play, though, lah - that beat sounds like a Donae'O U.K Funky riddim and this scally has more personality than every boring London Drill rapper combined. If his beef with Sami Khedira seems hella random then consider this: it could be that he's carrying on the Liverpudlian tradition of Merseyside's O.G German hater Stan Boardman.

Wednesday 19 January 2022

T.I. Vs. T.I.P. voice

T.I. - 24's
(From Trap Muzik album; 2003)

T.I. - Be Easy
(From Trap Muzik album; 2003)

T.I. - Rubber Band Man
(From Trap Muzik album; 2003)

I wanna talk to you, shorty, because you be trippin' sometimes. It ain't a doubt in my mind that Trap Muzik had one of the best singles trifectas of all time. Ain't shit harder than 24's; smarter than Be Easy; more heart than Rubber Band Man; don't argue with me, reader.

Coulda been a perfect quadruple if Let's Get Away wasn't the fourth single. What began as a smooth jam for hoes with gold teeth and hoes with good credit quickly became Tip's perversion on wax. My man put the T.I into T.M.I on that song. Damn, son - T.I. was Brad J in the streets but J. Cole between the sheets.

Never forget the Planez verse, never forgive it either.

Tuesday 18 January 2022

Wassup, Alice?

Scando The Darklord - Hexes & Jinxes
(From Hexes & Jinxes album; 2021)

Nef The Pharoah's San Francisco sidekick probably chose the name Scando The Darklord to stay on-brand, but my man's moniker makes it sound like he's a Black Metal bork who sacrifices Cats to Satan. The name he should have chosen is Blapstar The Second because that's precisely what he is in the pantheon of Mac Dre mini-me's. Here at The Martorialist we fux with with Hexes & Jinxes because it's a catchy little slice of Alright, Alice-core where Scando curses his ex with Voodoo and then coaxes his video-hoe into the Videodrome.

18 days into the new year and I prefer 2021 songs I've recently discovered to any 2022 shit I've heard so far. Talk about a dry January.

Thursday 13 January 2022

Generic list post: can you believe 1992 was 30 years ago?

Kriss Kross - Jump
(From Totally Krossed Out album; 1992)

It wouldn't be January without at least one nostalgia list from ya host. In no particular order of preference, here's my top 50 Rap songs of 1992. This was the year where it became explicitly apparent that the 80s was over and things done changed. Are there glaring omissions from this list? Probably, but they definitely weren't recorded by Das EFX.

Eric B. & Rakim - The Punisher
Mac Dre - All Damn Day
Ultramagnetic MC's - Poppa Large (East Coast mix)
Dr. Dre - Let Me Ride
Ice Cube - It Was A Good Day
Da Lench Mob ft. Ice Cube - All On My Nut Sac
UGK - Cocaine In The Back Of The Ride (O.G version)
EPMD ft. K. Solo & Redman - Head Banger
Redman - Tonight's Da Night
D.J Jimi ft. Juvenile - Bounce (For The Juvenile)
Grand Puba - 360 (What Goes Around)
Mary J. Blige ft. Grand Puba - What's The 411
Pete Rock & CL Smooth ft. Grand Puba - Skinz
Brand Nubian - Punks Jump Up To Get Beat Down
DJ Quik - When You're A Gee
Gang Starr - B.Y.S
Tung Twista - Back 2 School
Black Sheep - The Choice Is Yours (Revisited)
A Tribe Called Quest ft. Kid Hood & Leaders Of The New School - Scenario (remix)
Too $hort - Step Daddy
Pooh-Man - Funky As I Wanna Be (LP mix)
Percee P & Ekim - Lung Collapsing Lyrics
Compton's Most Wanted - Hood Took Me Under
Digable Planets - Rebirth Of Slick (Cool Like Dat)
Boogie Down Productions - Duck Down
Above The Law ft. 2Pac & Money B - Call It What U Want
Kool G. Rap & DJ Polo - Ill Street Blues
Main Source ft. Neek - Fakin' The Funk
Nas - Halftime
Young Cellski - Streets Of Frisco
Pretty Tone Capone - Can't Talk Too Long On The Telephone
The Pharcyde - Officer
Little Shawn - Hickeys On Your Chest
Willie D - I'm Goin' Out Like A Soldier
Raheem - 5th Ward
Big Mello - Mac's Drive Lacs
Black Moon - Who Got The Props
Paris - Sleeping With The Enemy
Positive K - How The F**k Would You Know
Lil' Elt - Get The Gat
Zhigge - Rakin' In The Dough
Wu-Tang Clan - Protect Your Neck
Master P - Bloody Murder
EA-Ski - Mama Used To Say
Onyx - Throw Ya Gunz
Spice 1 - Welcome To The Ghetto
Lord Finesse ft. Big L - Yes You May (remix)
Showbiz & A.G - More Than One Way Out The Ghetto
Diamond D - Freestyle (Yo, That's That Shit)
Beastie Boys - So What'Cha Want
Filthy Phil - Deadgiveaway

The petition to get a mastered MP3 of the video mix of Royal Rock's Pure Pimp starts here.

Monday 10 January 2022

Late pass: Above The Clouds

You, a square: I love Cloud-Rap.
Me, a connoisseur: I'm a Earth's Atmosphere-Rap man, myself.
Traxamillion - Spaceship
(From the internet; 2008/Traxamillion DID IT TOO! mixtape; 2012)

On one hand, I love discovering an old song that rocks my world. On the other hand, it makes me sad when the old song coulda lowkey rocked the world but got lost in ZShare loosie MP3 oblivion. Spaceship coulda been a contender, it coulda been somethin' like a NorCal equivalent of Jackie Chain's Rollin'. This shit might be the most BAYTL song Traxamillion ever recorded - no mean feat when you consider he produced Futuristic Swag era B.o.B. Fabo saw spaceships on Bankhead, Traxamillion saw spaceships in San Jose and he didn't even have to use the James Lick telescope.

One of the most remarkable things about Rap is its magical ability to make blokey car-talk sound exotic. Other people's cars are as boring a topic as other people's dreams, so when some rando in the pub starts talking to me about his motor I glaze over in 15 seconds flat, yet when a rapper does it in a song I'm hanging off every word for dear life like Hans Gruber. Call it Rap's whip appeal.

Saturday 8 January 2022

Shhniz Khalifa

Tony Shhnow - Sometimes
(From Kill Streak 2 album; 2021/YouTube: 2022)

**M&S advert voice** This is not just my favourite Tony Shhnow song since F*ckwitcha, this is my favourite Tony Shhnow song since F*ckwitcha that's also the best Wiz Khalifa song since Smoke Chambers.

Wiz Khalifa - Smoke Chambers
(From Taylor Gang 2 mixtape; 2015)

Wiz Khalifa made a Mac DeMarco sample sound fly and was listening to Max B when people thought Saigon was gonna save New York. Ya favourite rapper could never.

Friday 7 January 2022

Gotta go, Coolio, meanin' it's gettin' Too Hot

Life's a biiiaaatch the way Coolio is remembered as a one hit wonder, especially when the one hit he's remembered for is #actually his third best hit. Get a calculator, do the math: Gangsta's Paradise gets in where it fits in at number three behind Fantastic Voyage and Coolio's hit single ne plus ultra Too Hot. Only a G-Funk backdrop and a J.T Taylor chorus could turn the topic of STD's into a Pop-Rap classic. Before Too $hort told the turf to Burn Rubber, Coolio implored the lads to wear one.

Coolio ft. J.T Taylor - Too Hot
(From Gangsta's Paradise album; 1995)

Gangsta's Paradise woulda been relegated to Coolio's fourth best hit if Tommy Boy had dropped the extended version of Aw Here It Goes as a single. It's a Hardy Boy mystery why the label never released that shit on 12", and a Nancy Drew mystery why it only exists on the European CD of Coolio's greatest hits.

Coolio - Aw Here It Goes (Kenan & Kel extended Theme)
(From TV show; 1996/Fantastic Voyage: The Greatest Hits album; 2001)

Any good late-career Coolio singles I should know about? If so, hold my hand and take me to the promised land.

Tuesday 4 January 2022

A Banner year

You thought 2021 had been consigned to the attic to gather dust forever ever? Au contraire, mon square - there's still gems to discover and discuss; gems like my favourite Saweetie-core song thus far. That beat has had me rewinding this shit like what? Like a simp! So much current Rap is accidentally Cadillac On 22z inspired that it's a Saweet surprise to hear a Like A Pimp interpolation instead.

YRB NY - Replace Me
(From Replace Me single; 2021)

But why does a lass from San Francisco have NY in her name? It's a mystery, Scooby Doo. The only New York thing about this song is the puppet dance at 2:13 made famous by the Chicken Noodle Soup video.

Sunday 2 January 2022

When I say Trax Records I ain't talkin' about Chicago House, boiiiiiii

Robocop stunna shades on to hide my sadness at Traxamillion's death. Now there was a producer who knew how to crank out Slap Tremendos, Slap Anthemos and Slap Classicos. Trax's solo shit was underrated too because he had songs like 808 In It which shoulda gone Slapinum With No Features™ (edit: or maybe not lolz. Still love this song tho.)

Traxamillion - 808 In It
(From Ridin' High mixtape; 2007)

Traxamillion needs to go down in history as the only producer to make a legitimately great Rap song with Travis Barker on percussion. In fact, 808 Re-Drum might have invented Swag-Slap and should have been a Blog-Rap hit.

Traxamillion ft. Travis Barker - 808 Re-Drum
(From Radio album; 2012)

Fly like a Pterodactyl, Traxamillion's off to a higher plane. Rest easy in the Baytrix, bruv.