Friday 31 May 2024

Generic list post: May 2024

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when I found a TV gem I was hitherto unaware of: Vincent Gallo being interviewed by Johnny Vaughan on British television circa 1999. Bleeped for cursing and slander but still classic Prince Vince. Makes for an ideal double-bill with his appearance on the U.K show Movietalk.

Black Jesus & Snypa - G Notes (1997)
DaBanggaz314 - Run Up Get Dun Up (2009)
38 Dezzie ft. Mouse On Tha Track - On My Shit (2021)
Mello Buckzz - Move (2023)
GloRilla - Yeah Glo! (2024)
Ezale - Fun (2024)
Coyote - Devils Contract (2024)
Common & Pete Rock - Wise Up (2024)
Sexyy Red - She's Back (2024)
Myaap & Yonaa - Choppa Sound (2024)

Bonus bloggin: 1nce again I'm gonna use my monthly wrap-up post to keep track of the best movies and TV shows I've been watching. * indicates rewatches dunnit.

Movies I watched and liked:
The Cars That Ate Paris (1974)
Picnic At Hanging Rock (1975) *
Restless Natives (1985) *
The Truman Show (1998) *
Freeway II: Confessions Of A Trick Baby (1999)
Love Lies Bleeding (2024)
Challengers (2024)

TV shows I watched and liked:
Prisoner: Cell Block H (episodes 89 to 103) (1980)
Neighbours (new episodes) (2024)
Dead Set (all 5 episodes) (2008)
Inside No.9 (series 9 episodes 1 to 4) (2024)
Doctor Who (Space Babies episode) (2024)
Doctor Who (73 Yards episode) (2024)
Match Of The Day 1 and 2 (new episodes) (2024)

Monday 27 May 2024

It's the Dezzie Dez

The only 38 Dezzie songs I'd heard previously were pointless beatjacks of Baton Rouge classics so I'd never bothered to investigate him any further. Then David Drake sent me Dezzie's latest single My Shirt saying it's Martorialist-friendly. He's right because that shit sounds like Young Ready if he'd signed to Trill ENT in 2008 and recorded more music with Mouse in the vein of 1 Rubber. But there's a plot-twist: it turns out there's a 38 Dezzie & Mouse song from 2021 which is so Martorialist-friendly that it coulda been my bezzy m8 for the past 3 years. How u luh dat?

38 Dezzie ft. Mouse On Tha Track - On My Shit
(From On My Shit single; 2021)

Saturday 25 May 2024

Born To Audiomack: D.O.OM Entertainment Top 5 Choonz

D.O.O.M Entertainment was a Yonkers record label which dropped a string of 12" singles and a compilation album between 1996 and 1998. Their roster included rappers you've probably never heard of like Phil Blunts and Black Jesus, and they also released killer deep cuts by rappers you've probably heard of like Sporty Thievz and Genovese. Here's a Quinary Of Quality playlist featuring the label's 5 best choonz as according to me. True story: On The Attack is my G.O.A.T minor Tunnel Banger™ which shoulda been a major Tunnel Banger™. Pity about that one #problematic line tho eh?

D.O.O.M Entertainment Top 5 Choonz:
1. Phil Blunts - On The Attack (1996)
2. Sporty Thievz - Ya Don't Stop (1998)
3. Genovese - Decisions (1998)
4. Black Jesus & Snypa - G Notes (1997)
5. Phil Blunts ft. Black Jesus - They Don't Really Love Us (1997)

* The Sporty Thievz song has vanished from Bandcamp, isn't on YouTube, and has never been on any official DSPs so it's currently a MARTORIALIST EXCLUSIVE!! Find the MP3 here.

* G Notes and They Don't Really Love Us are two of the most "you can check CNN for The War Report"-core songs you'll ever hear.

Wednesday 22 May 2024

Common People

"Like the prize in a race, that boy hold the metal
From the scars on his face, I can tell he know the ghetto
Where we both tryna get to, it ain't coincidental
His is on the streets, mines is over instrumentals
The Lord said my mental to be more than sentimental
The ventricles that I vent through are temples of what I been through"

Common & Pete Rock - Wise Up
(From Wise Up single; 2024)

Oh, so that's why Rio Ferdinand's beard has gone grey - Common nicked his Just For Men dye. When I say this sounds like a lost Common song released on 12" by an indie record label between 1998 and 2001, plz believe I mean that as the highest compliment. Common spittin' lines like "my man ain't from Dallas but he know where the tecs is" over a Pete Rock beat that's built on the bones of The Bridge is exactly what I didn't know I needed in 2024.

Headz - what's yer favourite Rap song built on the bones of The Bridge? I'm a Star Is Born by Bloodshed & Cam'Ron man, meself.

Sunday 19 May 2024

Conversation With A Devil

Regular readers will remember 3 Lokos as one of my favourite songs of 2023: Cholo hard-rock Rap with Shaq comin' delivering multis like a Holland & Barrett 3-for-1 offer. Been hoping Coyote would drop another joint I could use as a B-side and their new single Devils Contract goes together with 3 Lokos like The Show goes together with La Di Da Di. What we have here is some conceptual back-and-forth shit which takes its cues from Murder Was The Case and Guilty Conscience. Dead @ the Devil saying he represents some Soccer players via a hologram of David Beckham. Bit harsh, although Argentina's very own "El Cholo" Diego Simeone would agree.

Coyote - Devils Contract
(From Devils Contract single; 2024)

File this under 'Rap videos which feature a more convincing Devil than the final episode of Dallas.'

Saturday 18 May 2024

Mello Music Group

"Drunk off Taylor's Port might teleport myself into some coochie"

Mello Buckzz - Move
(From Soundcloud; 2023/YouTube; 2024)

Juke them, hoes. Here's a Chicago Drill & Bass booty-chatter booty-clapper with a video that's even more lesbo-erotic than Love Lies Bleeding, albeit minus the gross toe-sucking. Two thumbs up (the butt.)

Friday 17 May 2024

I do my routes more efficiently because I'm a beautiful and gorgeous delivery driver

Ezale - Fun
(From Fun single; 2024)

Why did the Funktown rapper switch careers from Ice Cream Man to FedEx Man? Because he didn't wanna work sundaes. Eh, I got 99 problems, but flakey jokes ain't 1.

Ezale's back like next year puttin' the fun into function musik with a single he originally teased two years ago. Naturally, it's another ToNHTe Show-core slap from Jac Dre AKA the missing link between Jackie Chain and Mac Dre. When that vocal sample hits I'm pullin' Thizz Faces like I just smelt my own piss after eatin' asparagus. I'm always moaning that Ezale doesn't drop enough music, but all 5 of his comeback singles have been hot like Kampot Pepper Crab, and I'll always prefer rappers who drop a hot single and then dip to rappers who stink the Rap landscape up releasing 337 brainfart freestyle tracks every 365 days. When I say Ezale is the Rap equivalent of Drexl from True Romance I ain't just talkin' about their shared penchant for dreadlocks and droppin' n-bombs, boiiiiii - I'm talkin' their maximum impact via minimum appearance-time.

Tuesday 14 May 2024

Skinny blogger swag, yeah I be on my T.I.

"Talkin' about you sell dope, you 'bout to hop in Lambos
You live with yo' momma, and she live with yo' grandma
Spent yo' last on the ruger, now you ain't got no ammo
Now when my soljas catch ya you gon' think they wearin' camo"

Foxx - Shut Up
(From Foxx Mayweather mixtape; 2012)

I'm all up in your Best Rap Dis Songs Of All Time Spotify playlist editing it to include Foxx's Shut Up. This shit was directed at Mista and Young Ready, but the specifics of the beef aren't important: it's just a funny slice of Louisiana tuba-step with zingers which have ricocheted & reverberated around my brain for the last 12 years. "Shootin' with yo' eyes closed hopin' you don't hit shit/Oh you a hitman, but in jail you hit dicks!"

The same mixtape Shut Up comes from also contains I Wonder. One of the ultimate Baton Rouge barbiturate-ballads. War inside in my head Blues-Rap for brothers with suicidal tendencies like Rocky George.

Friday 10 May 2024

Teeth what a relief

GloRilla - Yeah Glo!
(From Ehhthang Ehhthang album; 2024)

M8, this song has grown on me like toe hair. I went from thinking 'this shit is cool' to thinking 'this shit is as good as FNF (Let's Go).' Most importantly it conclusively proves that GloRilla has broken Rap's cosmetic dentistry curse wherein a rapper gets their teeth fixed and their music forever takes a dramatic dip in quality thereafter (see: Nas, Gucci Mane, King Louie, Young Thug etc.) Knuck if you buck the Curse! Ain't gonna lie, I was completely oblivious to the Run Up Get Dun Up song it interpolates until now. Some of you muhf*ckers will probably front that you had it in your 2009 year end list which has now conveniently vanished from the internet, but I can smell a lie like a fart in a phone booth. This is the best Crime Mob song Crime Mob never recorded.

DaBanggaz314 - Run Up Get Dun Up
(From Run Up Get Dun Up single; 2009)

Bonus beats: the only rapper whose music #actually improved when they got their teeth fixed was Consequence. Rock N Roll is a personal indie-era classic/ya host's favourite random Dilla production, but there's no doubt Con's music got better after his oversized dentures transformed him into Terry Turkey Teeth in the mid 2000s.

Monday 6 May 2024

It's ecstatic up north

Yeah, America invented House music, but Britain gave that shit wings and made it fly. Here's inarguable proof via a 55 second live clip filmed at Liverpool's infamous Quadrant Park club circa 1991. What Liverpool lacked in having its own equivalent of 808 State or A Guy Called Gerald, the city made up for by knowing how to party. Someone in the YouTube comments reckons that this clip is "quite simply the best clubbing video on the entire internet!" Me, I'd crank the hyperbole-o-meter up even further: in the 4.5 billion years Earth has existed there has never been a better example of man & music in absolute euphoric synergy than when that beat drops at the 24 seconds mark.

Every 90s British Rave club had one freakishly tall shirtless bloke who was a dead-ringer for Zlatan Ibrahimovic.