This is the first Bandit Gang Marco I'd pay 99p for if it weren't on a free Livemixtapes release

Bandit Gang Marco - Get Low
(From You Don't Know Me mixtape; 2015)


Linking two birds with one post here since Get Low by Bandit Gang Marco is both a notable addition to the Swag-Rap renaissance canon AND a pertinent reminder that Illegal Alien by Genesis is a song/video which actually happened IRL and not just inside Phil Collins' brain.

Generic list post: lyrics of furry

Let's talk about lyrics from rap songs you initially misheard during your first listen. Preferably from the last 3 or so years, but get at me, dog, with all your dogberryisms no matter their vintage. Some examples from ya boy Mac Malapropism right chea:

"Just a young 'hood n*gga, Screech raised me"

"My young bitch blow up like a tampon"

"It's goin' down like celery, there's nuthin' you can tell me"

"18 shots I don't need no aim, cops roll round our emo slang"

"But I swear with these liquor shots Ill shoot it out with 5-0"

"She get on that dick and stay on all night like Porsche lights"

"I feel like faithful, I feel like faithful, I feel like faithful, I feel like faithful"

"I'm the stink, you the baloney"

"I'm so fancy, can't you taste this chode?"

Slangin' humble pie and St Ides in the same sentence #3

I still owe Lil' Chris a big apology for mistakenly thinking Same Shit Different Day and 2 Fake were his only good songs. Keep Your Head Up came recommended via Chris himself in defense of his catalogue and, fair play, it's another marvelous slice of bittersweet polyphonic westside Chicago rap:

Lil' Chris of M.I.C - Keep Your Head Up
(From Keep Your Head Up single; 2014)


What makes Keep Your Head Up a bit special is that it's such a plucky juxtaposition of the surreal and the very concrete real, with producer David Jansen cranking the melodic Emo-Tune sound of Same Shit Different Day up into tampon commercial backing-track territory, and Chris spinning us a couple of street-level yarns cut from the same cloth as Hey Young World and the song's namesake by 2pac. Like those sanitary towels Claire Rayner used to advertise on the telly, Keep Your Head Up will make you feel like you were born with wings.

Only thing I'm scared of is God and the Feds, lost a lotta bloggers and they ain't even dead

Wrote about Trippin' by Jackie Chain & Rittz and Same Way by Uncle Murda & Keyz for the Deep Cuts weekly round-up on Complex. The latter features a logically sound argument for why selling crack was morally acceptable and a bewilderingly illogical argument against free healthcare over a sample that sounds like it must come from some '70s soul cover version of You Don't Know What You've Got (Until You Lose It) by Ral Donner, who was the Sen City to Elvis Presley's Max B. Anyone identify this version's author?

Uncle Murda ft. Keyz - Same Way
(From Ain't Nothing Sweet mixtape; 2014)

Blog you up

Top 3 worst things rap music glorifies: True Religion denim, handshakes between men who are forever standing around posing with their hands on their nuts, drinking syrup. I wrote about the latter in my Deep Cuts entry about Speaker Knockerz's Erica Kane which is sort of doubling as a tribute post. Unsurprisingly, Complex cut the last sentence where I suggested the world would be a better place if Yung Lean had died instead of him.

"I took his hoe and then beat up the kitten
She give me brain, I'ma pay her tuition
I'm at the top so I guess I'm the villain"

Speaker Knockerz - Erica Kane
(From Erica Kane single; 2014)


Ya boy MC Renato Pagnani had posted Speaker Knockerz music when he was still breathing and already planned on Deep Cuts-ing Erica Kane this week after noticing it on DJ Day Day's Audiomack page last thursday, so I'm not the Speaker Knockerz equivalent of one of those ghouls who suddenly pronounced themselves Doe B experts after he died despite the fact they'd never once mentioned him prior to his death, honest, guv!

(One last Mic Terror post)

Are you familiar with the story about Puffy gettin' head from Naomi Campbell and then failing to reciprocate when she asked him to go down on her? Looks like Mic Terror is judging by the song No Panties. Fear not, though, feminists and faux-feminists 4 hire whenever a thinkpiece opportunity is available because Lucci Vee is on hand for the second verse to break hearts by finding fellas, fucking fellas, and then forgeting fellas. Read about No Panties on Deep Cuts here.

Mic Terror ft. Lucci Vee - No Panties
(From Fresh Prince Of Darkness album; 2014)


Ain't gon' lie, ya boy Jenn Pelle Pelle right chea is very disturbed by rappers like Lucci Vee and Young Thug bowling around town with septum piercings. C'mon, folks, there is nothing cool about looking like '80s anarcho-punx or '90s raver crusties.

"Cut it out!"

Betcha can't blog like meeeee, betcha can't blog like me

It looked like M.I.C's Lil' Chris had consigned himself to the one-hot-song-in-your-career junkpile after he'd abandoned the melancholia of Same Shit Different Day to make half-arsed jaunty Bop songs that don't behove a 4'9 gentleman who looks like he was made out of the spare parts God discarded when putting Lil' Cease and Jadakiss together, but I'll be damned if his new single 2 Fake isn't a reprise of his Same Shit Different Day's style, so I wrote about it for Deep Cuts on Complex. Read that shit here.

Lil' Chris of M.I.C - 2 Fake
(From YouTube; 2014)

Bloggin's not a movie, like J.D & Veronica I lean on 'em with the loogie

I wrote about Movie by Giftz for Deep Cuts on Complex. I think it's Giftz's 1st song of 2014 and it's pretty much my 2 favourite Giftz songs of 2013 in 1.

"Wise words from a decent man, I never heard those
My role model drove a Bentley with a four and a fur coat"

Giftz - Movie
(From the internet; 2014)

All bad things come to an end sorta like Eckō

Wrote about La The Darkman's Ice Cold Guinness from the Willie The Kid & Bronze Nazareth album, and She Da One by Trouble from Kato of SMKA's Kato's Revenge compilation for the Deep Cuts round-up on Complex this week. Was considering writing about Shy Glizzy's La Introducción instead of the latter but then decided against it because I don't really have shit to say about that song other than it sounds like Larry Lifeless from Upside Down Cross doing a Gucci Mane impersonation:

Shy Glizzy - La Introducción
(From Young Jefe mixtape; 2014)

I need a bag of Deep Cuts

Wrote about Fuck That by J. Stalin & Too $hort and Stupendous by Cashy for Deep Cuts on Complex. The former song I love wholeheartedly, the latter song I like a lot but have major reservations about its artist. Fortunately, said reservations were soothed by the fact I could link to two Concentration Camp tracks and yung Birdman & co's O.G smackploitation Bounce anthem I Need A Bag Of Dope in the blurb:

B-32 & DJ Crack Out ft. PxMxWx & Ms. Tee - I Need A Bag Of Dope
(From I Need A Bag Of Dope cassette; 1993)


Just say no to going out like Dash Snow, obviously!

You writin' about Choppa's suit & pretendin' to like Lil' Boosie, you got no swag, blogga, you hella boosy

Posted Mouse On Tha Track's Been A G Thang on here over the weekend, and I wrote about it more thoroughly for Deep Cuts on Complex yesterday. Mouse's manager was also kind enough to hook me up with the MP3 to post here:

Mouse On Tha Track - Been A G Thang
(From the internet; 2014)


Unrelated note: now Party has officially become Rich Homie Quan's new single, does that mean we can finally get a properly mastered MP3 of it? Where's RHQ's manager at?

DB cut

Wrote about DB Tha General's weird and wonderful Savage for Deep Cuts on Complex, so here's the MP3 in case anyone needs it. FYI, Savage is tied with Cam'Ron & Sen City's Instagram for the most novel appearance of flies in a recent Rap song:

"East Oakland, land of the homicide
You don't wanna go there, nah, I don't tell lies
I'm the shit that's why you see all these flies
And don't get it twisted you fuckin' with family ties"

DB Tha General - Savage
(From the internet; 2013/Motel6 album; 2014)


Quick plea: any of you northern Californians fancy picking me up a copy of DB's Welcome To The Navy album on CD if you come across it when you're out and about? Will pay a finder's fee as well as the cost of the CD and all P+P to the U.K.

I blog like a parrot, I never been a pigeon

Here's my Deep Cuts for Complex this week: the Pimpin' Mane remix by SMKA with Rittz, Jackie Chain, Scotty & RaRa, and When We Ride by DJ Kay Slay featuring Sheek Louch, Styles P & Uncle Murda.

And here's the MP3s of both tracks should you need them on your phone/MP3-player in a time of crisis. Doesn't matter whether you're trapped in a lift or staring down a dark night of the soul, it's always handy to have at least one song featuring Jackie Chain on deck:

"I see a whole lotta lemon lames but I don't mention names
You pimp a lotta hoes on Instagram, you're really square like a picture frame
That ain't pimpin', mane"

SMKA ft. Rittz, Jackie Chain, Scotty ATL & RaRa - Pimpin' Mane remix
(From the forthcoming Kato's Revenge album; 2014)


"Shells in the sawn off
Goons in The Waldorf
N*ggas that I'm beefin' with hopin' that it's called off"

DJ Kay Slay ft. Sheek Louch, Styles P & Uncle Murda - When We Ride
(From DJ Kay Slay's The Rise Of A City mixtape; 2014)

All solid bloggaz with me is how we was brought up, bloggaz start talkin' to rappaz and get caught up.

My Deep Cuts for Complex this week: Smoke Up by Stunt-N-Dozier featuring Peryon J Kee & Lil' Pooh, and Fuck A Plan B by Ace B8gie & Murph Watkins.

The latter Deep Cut brought forth a comparison with the Steady B & Cool C incident, which gives me a convenient excuse to repost the legendary Fat Lace fashion shoot recreation of the day Steady B & Cool C made like Shaggy's son and tried to robb bank$:

In a Rush like Simmons

I wrote about ZMoney's Rollin' and Vange by Agallah for Deep Cuts on Complex this week. Now it's the turn of the 3 former SoManyShrimp all stars to put the ruger on, put the luger on. This shit we write about, it's more than a song.

I'm not a blogger I just write about rap, metaphorically I slide like Mike Jack'...

Actually, my sliding is more like Jack Tweed-meets-Kelvin Jack than that pederast who buggered Corey Feldman and Macaulay Culkin, but I did write about a new Fred The Godson song in thee Rap & Bullshit stylee for Complex's Deep Cuts series today.

"I see u shawty, she peepin' tha God!"


Not even mad at David Drake & Dave Bry for editing out my line about Fred resembling "a Looney Tunes cartoon version of Scarface if he'd been smacked in the face with a frying pan by Bugs Bunny" from the first paragraph since Jack Thriller's description of Fred in that ThisIs50 video Complex linked to in its place was the greatest music criticism of 2011.

Fuck that giggling male chickenhead Elliot Wilson, Jack is the best interviewer in the business right now.

Waitin' to exhale, I can't breathe around a blogger

Gonna chuck an MP3 of my favourite song from the Stu Hustlah & Lil' Juu Lillie Street is the Street album up on here for now since I'm hopefully gonna be talking about it elsewhere in the next day or so.

"So much in my life, dope in my pours
Tryna find a way out, spittin' raps 'til I'm hoarse.."

Stu Hustlah & Lil' Juu - This Is Me
(From Lillie Street is the Street album; 2014)


EDIT: Wrote about This Is Me for Complex's newfangled daily Deep Cuts series. Feels guud to get a bunch of J. Cole fanboys to listen to a Murdergang song.

Wale = Shiest Bubz biter

Ayo Wale, never forget that Shiest Bubz BEEN had the Complex security ready 4 war ever since he threatened to pop up to their offices and find David Drake over something I wrote before you try swaggerjacking Bubz's shtick 8 months later.

RESPECT THE EMPEROR, DOG!

R.I.P Fredo Fantano

Please welcome your new host of The Martorialist: Chris Thott!

Generic list post: Val DOOMican edition

Here at The Martorialist, we've only really ever fucked with MF DOOM on the occasions when he rhymes over MF DOOM beats, so, ideally, his official follow-up full length to Operation Doomsday would been made up of the best tracks from the King Gheedorah, Monsta Island Czars, and MF Grimm albums. If he'd have let ya boy DOOM Passantino right chea MC Serch this chimerical sophomore album, the tracklist would have ran a lil' somethin' like this:

1. One Smart N***** (Intro)
2. Fazers
3. Foolish (with MF Grimm & Megalon)
4. Mic Line
5. Rain Blood (with Megalon)
6. Final Hour
7. Anti-Matter (with Mr Fantastik)
8.Fastlane (with Kurious)
9. Escape (with Monsta Island Czars)
10. I Hear Voices 0 (with MF Grimm)
11. I Hear Voices 1
12. Next Level
Kurious, Megalon, and MF Grimm all would have had solo tracks on there with Fastlane, Rain Blood, and I Hear Voices 0 respectively; Monsta Island Czars would have been allotted another weed-carrier posse cut in the vein of Who You Think I am? with Escape; and the absolutely incredible Arrow Root instrumental those Scienz Of Life plums ruined on Next Level from the King Gheedorah album would have had DOOM gettin' all ? over the top of it as the emotive album closer instead.

Anybody fancy making this into a YouTube playlist?