Generic list post: May 2026

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when David Raya ensured he won't win this season's Ballon d'OR. Oh well, it's a tinpot title anyway. How can it possibly be a prestigious award when Michael f**King Owen won it once?

Run-D.M.C - Jam-Master Jammin' (Rick Rubin remix) (1985)
Rev Run I Used To Think I Was Run (2005)
Sir Michael Rocks - Talkin' Legit (2025)
Trim - BOAT (Audio Exhbit performance) (2026)
Seiji Oda & Trunk Boiz - Go Dumb! (2026)
The Assembly - Mob Throb (2026)
Bruus ft. Mic Terror & Gzus Piece - All I Do (2026)
Bri3 - Whatever (2026)
70th Street Carlos - Get Out The Way (2026)
Duke Deuce - Feathers Up (2026)
Mexikodro - Mail (2026)
Mýa ft. Too $hort - Just A Little Bit (2026)
Donae'O - Big Up The Gooners Around The World (2026)

Bonus bloggin: 1nce again I'm gonna use my monthly wrap-up post to keep track of the best movies and TV shows I've been watching. * indicates rewatches dunnit.

Movies I watched and liked:
Meantime (1983) *
Krush Groove (1985) *

TV shows I watched and liked:
Dear England (episodes 1 and 2) (2026)
Arsenal vs. Fulham (2026)
Arsenal vs. Athletico Madrid (2026)
Arsenal vs. West Ham (2026)
Celtic vs. Rangers (2026)
Arsenal vs. Burnley (2026)
Celtic vs. Hearts (2026)
Bournemouth vs. Manchester City (2026)
Crystal Palace vs. Arsenal (2026)
Luke Littler vs. Gerwen Price (2026)
Luke Littler vs. Luke Humphries (2026)
Match Of The Day 1 and 2 (new episodes) (2026)

Late pass!

Run-D.M.C - Jam-Master Jammin' (Rick Rubin remix)
(From American Bandstand TV show; 1985)

Sum shit I was utterly oblivious to until I read JayQuan's book about Run-D.M.C's Raising Hell album: there's a Rick Rubin remix of Jam-Master Jammin' which knocks the original version outta the box. This was the second time Run-D.M.C worked with Rubin after Can You Rock It Like This and they even performed the remix on American Bandstand in 1985. The beat is kinda like a prototype for No Sleep Till Brooklyn in the same way that the beat on She's On It is kinda like a prototype for (You Gotta) Fight For Your Right (To Party). When I say prototype it's not a dis, boiiiii, because all 4 songs are hall of fame choonz in the pantheon of 1980s Rock Guitar-Rap IMHO. Another thing I was oblivious to until I read JayQuan's book was how insanely jealous Run was of LL Cool J. This was one of the factors why Run-D.M.C dumped Larry Smith as their main producer and switched to Rick Rubin for Raising Hell.

Rev Run - I Used To Think I Was Run
(From Distortion album; 2005)

Bonus beats: a notable entry in the canon of Shinola Songs On Shitty Albums is the opening track on Rev Run's solo LP. This is a proto-Top Shelf 8/8/'88 bangeur which would have sounded right at home as a token old skool choon on one of those mid 2000s Kay Slay compilations. In a perfect world there woulda been a remix featuring M.O.P where Danze & Fame made it clear that they were the true heirs to Run-D.M.C.

Legit by name, Legit by nature

Sir Michael Rocks - Talkin' Legit
(From the internet; 2025/Rock, Paper, Scissors: Choices album; 2026)

Ur boi has been on an early Cool Kids binge recently, so it's the perfect time to check out Sir Michael Rocks' recent solo dolo shit. Was expecting 500k would be the jam 4 me since it's a DJ Fresh production. Joke's on me like Kid Capri because Talkin' Legit is my #actual choon of choice. The kid Rocks is taking the Michael on this one and it gives me the po pimpish adrenaline rush of some modern day Legit Ballaz type shit.

Zoomers will not besmirch the word Gooners

Donae'O - Big Up The Gooners Around The World
(From Big Up The Gooners Around The World single; 2026)

We did it, Brooklyn, we did it!! After 22 long, lean years, Arsenal have only gone and blown the bloody doors off. Sod a rollercoaster, it's been a full Alton Towers of emotions this season. So many times it looked like a second place Groundhog Day for the Gooners again, but they've somehow won the league with one game to spare. The 1989 title decider at Anfield was one of the first Arsenal games my grandad took me to, so I'm down 4 whateva like M.O.P & O.C, but Man Citeh have an annoying habit of pulling rabbits out of hats on the last game of the season. This time, however, the points stacked up, Pep & Erling couldn't catch up, all the salt that haters are throwin' Arsenal need some ketchup. KEEP THROWIN' SALT ON "SET PIECE F.C"! THATZ SEASONING TO A STEAK! Ain't naan another premiership team this season scored a better goal than Max Dowman against Everton. Just like Arne Slot did last season, Mikel Arteta laid the murder game down on Pep Guardiola. What's Peppin', Kermie? That motherf**ker's gone and he's not comin' back, B.

Don't fancy our chances much against PSG in the Champion's League final tho tbh ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The Micgic Number

"These hoes look me in my eyes and call me beautiful
I say you right, baby, but bitch you still delusional
Moral is, two things can be right at the same time
Bitch-ass n***as done wrote some of the most insane lines"

Bruus ft. Mic Terror & Gzus Piece - All I Do
(From All I Do single; 2026)

Nothin' Can Stop had me open for another Bruus & Mic Terror track. Throw Gzus Piece into the mix and I'm a happy camper like Bruce Springsteen's sister in Sleepaway Camp II. That clickity-clackity beat on this one has got real #MicTerrorHive members firing up Chief Sampson right after.

My Mind Spray 22

MF DOOM made two of my favourite Rap albums of all time with Operation Doomsday and Black Bastards. But I view 60% of his recorded output in the same way that I view Lionel Messi's post-Barcelona career: best to pretend that it didn't happen as to not tarnish the legacy. Obviously the 2 Czarface albums DOOM recorded in his final years are the musical equivalent of Messi scoring free kicks and tap ins against farmers in the MLS.

I was unfortunate enough to hear some of the 2 Hard 4 The F**kin' Radio homage by That Canadian Nonce™. How is it even possible to make interpolating Mac Dre lyrics over a P-Lo beat sound like a sanitary towel commercial? That guy has the worst voice in the history of recorded music, and it boggles my mind that anyone finds his whiney music tolerable let alone pleasurable.

I'm not saying I wish that Russia would launch a drone strike on Toronto. I'm just saying that any city which inflicted That Canadian Nonce™ and Mindbender Futurama on the world deserves some sort of punishment.

Run-D.M.C's Raising Hell was the first Rap album I bought, and JayQuan is my favourite old skool Rap history-bod, so of course his recent book about the album is a Good Combination™. JayQuan is a convivial author who experienced the era and the album's impact from front, back & side to side, and he's big on details without being an annoying nutjob windbag like Dart Adams. Anecdotes and actual factz are provided by everyone involved in the making of the album, and it doesn't hurt that the book is fulla pictures of Run-D.M.C lookin' cooler than Polish feet.

More, more, more!

Duke Deuce - Feathers Up
(From Feathers Up single; 2026)

Duke Deuce · Feathers Up

70th Street Carlos' new single is so moreish, I need another song with similar berserker energy like now and shit, y'know, that shit now, I'm talkin' now. Alas, I don't have Cooky Puss' number, so I gave Duke Deuce a call and got him to pop back up with a real Memphis slobberknocker of a song. Cot-damn, he could beat Andre The Giant with this track. Giant Gonzalez too.

BOATs and hoes

Trim - BOAT
(From BOAT single; 2025)

Trim · BOAT

People have been mocking that Trim bird's live performance at the Rolling Loud festival. Which is ironic to me because thee definitive version of her break out song BOAT isn't the studio version or the remixes with YKNiece & BunnaB or Pooh Shiesty, it's this performance of it on the Audio Exhbit YouTube channel. She nails the timing and delivery, and her voice sounds better all natural without any studio trickery. You can't tell me nuffink to the contrary.

Trim - BOAT (live performance)
(From Audio Exhbit YouTube channel; 2026)

Some of my most-listened to Rap songs in 2026 are songs from 2025: Make Her Gig by Ezale, Disco Kryptonite by Newcleus, That's A Playa by Young Bari & BossLife Big Spence, No Lie by OnlyHeaven, and BOAT right here. Like Styles P nearly said, I don't care about the release date and whenever it dropped, I don't care about anything except the song being in my rotation because it's hot.

Berserker Bounce back!

70th Street Carlos - Get Out The Way
(From Get Out The Way single; 2026)

Boosie FatAzz caught a second wind off the second line. Legitimately thought this was a 2016 to 2018 Carlos song when I first clocked it: the Webbiefro is back in full bloom and the beat sounds like it could be a Trel Itz A Hit production. 'Los is back in that water like LL Cool J's parrot.

You don't wanna lose me like new I.D

Cool Kids ft. Lil' Wayne - Gettin' It
(From the internet; 2008)

tfs · The Cool Kids Ft Lil Wayne- Gettin It (320 Kbps)

I'm stickin' to the script like java when I say that Gettin' It still sounds hotter than lava. A very necessary rearrangement of Jam-Master Jay after Nas stunk the original beat up with his nauseating sex rhymes when he jacked it for You Know My Style. Gettin' It is such a message in a bottle from the Blog Era™ innit? The Cool Kids did their thing for 2 16s before Lil' Wayne came through and gaffled the song with 3 verses. Gettin' It was a loosie which was never released to retail and has still never made it to DSPs, but the MP3 went platinum on Hulkshare.

My favourite Cool Kids memory: Will High being absolutely disgusted by Mikey Rocks' skinny jeans in the Black Mags video. Absolute fury from a bloke who hadn't even listened to music made by blk ppl since 1999. My other favourite Cool Kids nemory: Mikey Rocks blowing my mind and my laptop speakers at the SAME DAMN TIME when I first heard it on MySpace in 2007. It was, to paraphrase Jason Fox, new school Rap with an old school steelo.

Cool Kids - Mikey Rocks
(From the internet; 2007/The Bake Sale album; 2008)

Smvrk · The Cool Kids - Mikey Rocks

Even more importantly than that, the Cool Kids MySpace page led me to discover future Martorialist favourite/Chicago's best kept secret Mic Terror via Cold As Hell and Juke Them Hoes. Shout out to Tom Anderson, the only tech-bloke social media entrepreneur who made the world a better place and then dipped with that Murdoch money.

My Mind Spray 21

Beastie Boys - Looking Down The Barrel Of A Gun
(From Paul's Boutique album; 1989)

One of the greatest mini-moments in Rap music: that 2 thump drum breakdown at 1:49 in Looking Down The Barrel Of A Gun. It lasts barely 2 seconds, but it hits like a cattle prod to my body and turns me into Busta in the Everything Remains Raw intro to the Woo-Hah video.

The Assembly - Mob Throb
(From The Assembly album; 2026)

The Assembly is a new Sic Wid It group comprising of E-40, Cousin Fik & Hitta Slim FKA Laroo T.H.H. DJ Fresh's mob musik synths on this song are so high-pitched they could be used as a dog whistle for missing pooches. High praise or wot?

Mýa Jammer

Mýa ft. Too $hort - Just A Little Bit
(From Just A Little Bit single; 2026)

This ain't Gina G, motherf**kers! $hort and Mýa go back like babies and pacifiers? Most unexpected collaboration of 2026 so far or wot? This song sounds like it could have dropped at any point in the last 30 years and that's why it's so good. Throwback R&Boogie which NorCal's electric-boogalooing fonky-grampa OG Mike Chaos can strut his stuff to. This shit is so Grown & Gorgeous™ that $hort even put a suit and tie on for the video.

Vince FM

Vincent Gallo - Drowning In Brown
(From Buffalo '66 soundtrack; 1998)

Drowning In Brown from Vincent Gallo's Buffalo '66 soundtrack is the best Check Your Head instrumental interlude which the Beastie Boys never recorded. Someone should interview Gallo and ask him about his favourite early 80s Rap songs from the Prince Vince era. What was he listening to on this boombox in 1982 when he was drowning in baby-blue? Definitely Spoonie Gee, but who else and which songs specifically?

Juiceboxxx really missed a trick by not rhyming over Drowning In Brown one time like 'Clef on the Fugees joint. Speaking of 'boxxx, Like A Maniac is up there with Lifestyles Of The Rich And Infamous by Ice-T and Touring by the Ramones in my personal canon of Songs About Life On The Road. On the air guitar-ometer, Like A Maniac scores a Bill & Ted "EXCELLENT!"

Juiceboxxx - Like A Maniac
(From Heartland 99 album; 2015)

Dance To My Misandry

Bri3 - Whatever
(From Whatever single; 2026)

The golden-era era of Hateful Hoe Rap singles continues with this song by Maryland's Bri3. Definitely wasn't expecting a cheeky Heavy D sample in a 2026 song. The overly critical hater's in the house! Give me more professionally A&R-ed Rap singles and less 74 second brainfart throwaway tracks.

Bonus beats: Seiji Oda brought the Trunk Boiz back again. A cool breeze on the boombox of AM radio bubblegum Hyphy. If I ruled the world this song would be the Steal My Sunshine of 2026.

Seiji Oda & Trunk Boiz - Go Dumb!
(From Go Dumb! twingle; 2026)

seiji oda · GO DUMB!