Generic list post: Tuff City edition

Oi Aaron Fuchs - if I refrain from mentioning your alleged pecuniary shortcomings in this generic list post of my 12 favourite songs in the Tuff City Records catalogue, will you hook me up with an MP3 of that secrete & rare Black Rob remake of Spoonie Gee's Take It Off in return?

1. Spoonie Gee - Street Girl (1985)
2. Lakim Shabazz - Your Arm's Too Short To Box With God (1989)
3. Coldcrush Brothers - Fresh, Wild, Fly And Bold (1984)
4. The 45 King - The 900 Number (1988)
5. Davy DMX - One For The Treble (1984)
6. PHD ft. Cormega - Set It Off (1991)
7. YZ - In Control Of Things (1989)
8. Grandmaster Caz - Yvette (1985)
9. Ultramagnetic MC's - Biscuits And Eggs (1996)
10. The Flavor Unit - Flavor Unit Assassination Squad (1990)
11. Lord Alibaski - Top Gun (1989)
12. Priority One - I Can't Go For That (1988)

In recent years Questlove has been the chief besmircher of Tuff City's business practices, nonetheless Fuchs is responsible for releasing some of the best 12" singles of the 1980s, getting the Coldcrush Brothers to record their one great studio song, convincing Grandmaster Caz to lay his legendary Yvette live routine down on wax before LL Cool J could kinda flagrantly jack it, and discovering Lakim Shabazz.

What's Questlove ever done for the better of humanity other than make Pumpkin roll in his grave as The Roots sullied the reputation of rap music made with teh real instruments, and pass himself off as a music scholar whilst mispronouncing the names of Sex Pistols albums & Roxy Music members?

Martorial elegance #74

Courtesy of Drew Huge, a 1983 Jonzun Crew press release with the quartet looking like Wolfgang Amstrad Moëzart & The 3 Macketeers at Rick James' annual player's ball:

Please believe Jonzun Crew's outfits are 100% more masculine than any rapper wearing True Religion bootcut jeans and hideous Giuseppe Zanotti high-tops made out of pleather and 4 different velcro straps.

Jonzun Crew - Space Is The Place
(From Space Is The Place single; 1982/Lost In Space album; 1983)

Quavo can't dance like me, Offset can't dance like me

One of these days The 99 Percent will cotton on the fact that Double Dip is their masterpiece and shoot a video for it which unleashes an entire new dance craze on a hitherto undiscovered social media video site. Until then you'll have to make do with their second best song Shabooyah! as their latest single and the perfect counteragent to that unfortunately boring new Travis Porter mixtape:

The 99 Percent - Shabooyah!
(From Yike In It EP; 2014)


Sucks that they put a corny Young Thug cabaret song on their EP instead of their third best song Slow Down, Hold On, but how can you be mad at the lads who now have two entries in this current new golden-era of dance records with Yike In It and Shabooyah!?

Hey, let's come up with a comprehensive list of the best dance songs of the past couple of years. We got the two aforementioned 99 Percent tracks, Slow Down by Clyde Carson, Don't Drop That Thun Thun by Finatticz, Gas Pedal and Red Nose by Sage The Gemini, Panoramic by Dmac et al (*1), Yiken by Priceless Da Roc, Drop That #NaeNae by We Are Toonz, Fiesta by Sicko Mobb, FeFe On The Block by Stunt Taylor and maybe one other Bop song. What else?

(*1 I finally got Step One to edit Dmac out of Panoramic for me only to find I missed his verse.)

#Emancipation

"So ladies we just ain't talkin' 'bout you
'Cause some of these n*ggas are bitches too!"

Ice-T - Bitches 2
(From O.G. Original Gangster album; 1991)



As chil'ren who learned everything we know about life from old Ice-T albums, Bitches 2 taught the Martorialist crew that the only acceptable form of hate is equal opportunity contempt. Thus, Trina & Lil' Mo's Shemix of K Camp & 2 Chainz's Cut Her Off comes as a much-welcome Gotta Hear Both Sides moment for the year's most overrated song, albeit one that Lil' Mo steals:

"Fuck him and his new bitch, I can give 2 shits
Especially since that was a bitch I used to be cool with"

Trina ft. Lil' Mo - Cut Her Off (Shemix)
(From the internet; 2014)


In an alternate universe where justice prevails, this will make the original irrelevant by the weekend, and K Camp's team will have no choice but to finally give 2014's best song about non-discriminatory contempt a push:

"I can't trust these n*ggas, I can't trust these hoes
Ohhhhhh nooooooooooooo"

K Camp - Oh No
(From Oh No single; 2014)

Is So Solid Crew bumrushing Cam'Ron's show in London the UK's version of MobStyle bumrushing N.W.A's show at The Apollo?

"Ravin' crew, how ya do?
So Solid Crew up in the venue"

So Solid Crew - Dilemma
(From Dilemma single; 2000)



Who witnessed the strength of street knowledge on this dilemma: bad situation then?

Yike Allen

Isn't it wonderful that a former Freestyle Friday champion like Priceless Da Roc can now avoid the post-106 & Park pitfalls of Posta Boy & Jin and end up carving out a career as the Sir Mix-A-Lot of Bay Area booty anthems? Fact: if more rappers based their careers on making dance songs about arses like Yiken and Priceless' latest slap Yike Stand, the world would be a much better place and nobody would have to record another Band Aid single; them kids in Africa don't need snow at Christmas when they can have Yike Vines 24/7 365 days a year instead.

Priceless Da Roc - Yike Stand
(From the internet; 2014)


That EMPIRE online label really need to turn their Yike 4 Life compilation into an ongoing series. They'd be the Street Sounds Electro compilations for the Hella Saucy generation.

The Link Print

Very impressed to see the Dougie make an appearance in a British daytime quiz show that's primarily watched by pensioners/students/housewives/the unemployed/the housebound plus quiz TV show nerds watching it on iPlayer when they get home like moi:

Actual facts: the Dougie's definitive moment on film still comes from its creator during the Guess Who? intro at The Rooftop in the Keep Rising To The Top video. If only IRL rap shows were like this:

Doug E. Fresh & The Get Fresh Crew - Keep Risin' To The Top
(From The Worlds Greatest Entertainer album; 1988)

Attn: Louisiana rap fans

This new Pyrex Radio 7 (Sex, Drugs & Money) mixtape by Big Jay & Dirty Glove Bastard is worth a quick shake since it features Max Minelli's best song of the year, plus a grip of exclusive shit like two tracks by Fiend in Whomp Whomp-mode, and a Mouse On Tha Track & C-Lo song that's a homage to Sickness and the first time 'Loc has touched down on a Mouse beat since 1 Rubber: