Wednesday, 18 May 2011

Wanted dead or alive # 6 : Disco Stu-pidity

Someone ID me the artiste and the title of this absurdly erotic song, puhleez. I'm assuming it's not actually called Use Me John, it's just that the Moxie Disco Edits label who put out the EP with this on a few years back in 2008 would generally issue the songs on their releases under pseudonyms because they were a bunch of bootlegging Borks from the Netherlands, as witnessed by the re-edit of Curtis Mayfield's What Is My Woman For? as Yes You May on the A side of the same 12" :

Unknown Artist - Use Me John (197?)


I can't quite parse whether this is song about Cunnilingus or the simple joys of losing one's body to the rhythm under the disco lights with a partner, but it doesn't really matter either way because I envision it as the de facto 70s porno soundtrack to an opening tracking shot of Vanessa Del Rio's arse in a pair of skin-tight Daisy Dukes walking down 42nd Street into a porno theater in where Ron Jeremy is sitting with a box of popcorn in his lap with a hole cut into it and his...

You get the picture. Use Me John's monolithic groove would sound pretty damn sweet with Camp Lo rapping about pearl necklaces over it, but, ultimately, I think its ideal home should have been as an interlude on a 90s Beatnuts album with snippets of XXXplicit Vanessa Del Rio dialogue carefully grated on top. Here's Vanessa looking sultry, vampish and ridiculously doable sometime in the early 80s before she went ham with cosmetic surgery. Shout outs to the woman who'd Lick dudes places other porn stars wouldn't dare put they faces :

1 comment:

brad said...

fat albert theme swag!

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