Martorialist elegance: Do The Fila

The most iconic All Fila Everything™ outfit in the history of Rap? It wasn't worn by noted-fanboy 2Pac or any of the Rappers who've recorded odes to the brand like Schoolly D and Steady B. Shit, it wasn't even worn by a Rapper - it was #actually worn by Eric B & Rakim's Fort Greene kingpin m8 Rapp Magnetic on the back cover of Paid In Full:

Ya host's own personal favourite All Fila Everything™ outfit in Rap history, however, is a bit more complicated. It was worn by Black Dynasty's Dion Stewart, but in a song which has no need to exist - the jankey video remix of Deep East Oakland:

Much like the O.G Goodfellas DVD, there's two sides to every story. But you either lyin' or you deaf like Ben Mitchell if you prefer the video mix of Deep East Oakland to the O.G version.

Black Dynasty ft. Dru Down & Dangerous Dame - Deep East Oakland
(From Deep East Oakland single; 1994)

Urbanlife Distribution / Rapbay.com · Black Dynasty Feat. Dru Down & Dangerous Dame - Deep East Oakland

Deprived of another classic Dru Down video outfit just because Black Dynasty decided to go for delf over a tinpot re-recorded beat. Oh the humanity.

Annual post about some random U.K tune

S1mba ft. DTG - Rover
(From YouTube; 2019)


Truthfully, I fronted on Rover for the longest - homeboy tryna flex in Superdry ski goggles is unforgivable, but as an anthem this song is undeniable. Rover had URL goin' nuts during lockdown to the point where it reached number 3 in the U.K Top 40, hilariously inspired an Australian remix, and even went gold in New Zealand (we did it, Moscaddie, we did it!) Now a certain sense of normality has resumed, Rover deserves to have IRL goin' nuts for what's left of this lost summer. Basically, if I can drunkenly sing "I just wanna make the moo lah lah, got 'em all screamin' ooh la la" in the pub on a quiet Wednesday night then it'll be my official Song Of The Summer™ 2020.

PS: there's even a new remix with Lil' Tecca for myopic 'Muricans!

Killer heels, darlin'

Flo Milli - Like That Bitch
(From YouTube; 2020)


Like I said, not so much DEATH BY STEREO as DEATH BY STILETTO!

Here at The Martorialist we're savouring Flo Milli's current run of singles because generic Auto-Tune f*ckery and cameos from hacks like Tyga and Gunna are surely inevitable. Highway to the danger zone from hereon in?

Dreams And Bugbears

Do you ever dream about music and then wake up sad because the song which soundtracked your sleep was just a figment of your imagination and it'll only ever exist in your head? Ya host had one last night where Nate Dogg flipped Biz Markie's Let Me Turn You On and I'm now feelin' blue because it was all a dream...

Biz Markie - Let Me Turn You On
(From All Samples Cleared album; 1993)

True story or no story reprise

"Ay, n*ggas slide but we don't scam
I just bought another glizzy, it's a grown man
Yeah, it bust moves but it don't dance
I should call him peanut butter 'cause he don't jam"

Mac J - Free Bris
(From YouTube; 2020)


Turns out I was wrong - this other Mac J track is #actually the most Front Page Of Siccness.net-core slap of 2020 thus far. Damn, Bris' sidekick/patna has some serious gas in him. Also see: Siccame which makes the ideal B-side to this.

"He ain't got on headphones so I know he heard
N*gga you ain't paralysed, bitch,you got ther nerve
He was dissin' on the first, he dead on the third
I run up in ya house, we call it a purge
N*gga this a life lesson, you live and you learn
Now his soul in the sky, it look like a bird
I call him Lil' Saint, that n*gga got served"

Mac J - Siccame
(From YouTube; 2020)

True story or no story

"When that drac' start singin' It gon' hit high notes
And that glock speak Spanish - adios!
**AY CARAMBA!**"

Mac J & Bris - Adios
(From YouTube; 2020)


Probably an unpopular opinion, but I like this more than any of the Bris solo tracks my ears have crossed paths with. Purely a production preference thing tho because Adios is the most Front Page Of Siccness.net-core slap of 2020 thus far.

The Ice Is Right

"Yo, how did he go out?
HE WENT OUT LIKE A BITCH!
So ladies, we just ain't talkin' 'bout you
'Cause some of y'all n*ggas is bitches 2"

Ice-T - Bitches 2
(From O.G. Original Gangster album/VHS tape; 1991)


All factoid, zero tabloid: there has never been a better example of "you made it a hot line, I made it a hot song" than Ice-T's Bitches 2. A random Bushwill Bill lyric from Size Ain't Shit expanded into a full fledged life lesson consisting of 4 different flesh & bone examples of 4 different full steezy fellas. People sleep on Ice-T's songwriting but that man was penning Rap gospel between 1986 and 1991.

Martorial Elegance: Lidl Wayne

Finally the U.K has a true heir to Kwik Save's Medina brand trainers with Lidl's foray into the budget supermarket shoe market. Forget uncle Charles, I wish Gary Warnett was here to pontificate about these shits:

Tbf, on a purely aesthetic level these things are no worse than any of those Yeezy clodhoppers. Here at The Martorialist we'll wear a Mac Dre cap or a Max B t-shirt, but we'll be damned if we ever walk around in KanYe Pest's equivalent of the dreaded Master P sneaker.