Saturday, 26 December 2015

Just sayin', bruv # 13

If there's one thing millennials have got right, it's their contempt for Star Wars. This is, after all, a mediocre franchise with one decent movie to its name which initially existed to sell toys to kids and only exists 37 years later to sell tie-in tat to '70s baby menchildren inflicting their childhoods on their own kids. Moreover, this is the franchise which single-handedly ended the wildest decade of American cinema and helped birth everything terrible about Hollywood post-1980: sequels, prequels, reboots, redubs, rejigs, movies that are composite sketches of other movies, movies by Kevin Smith.

There are, in fact, only 2 minor positives to emerge from the whole toxic debacle of Star Wars. The first is Carrie Fisher as an 80s equivalent of Liz Taylor in Cleopatra, the second is Max B saying "Luke I am your father!" as he mercilessly clowned Hell Rell & his mum on French Montana's Cokedog Millionaire DVD. The Wave >>>>> The Force:

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

"THAT BITCH LOOK LIKE FREEWAY!"

Darth Waver said...

Max goes tf in there hahaha.

L.A said...

Don't pretend you haven't seen The Force Awakens!

Kelvin Mack10zie said...

Ain't even seen the 90s movies let alone this.

Boba Fetty Wap said...

Max was the best.

Silkk tha Ewokker said...

Not a Star Wars fan then? To be fair, Star Wars wasn't the first prequel/sequel/franchise machine (Bond, Jaws, Exorcist, Psycho all spring to mind). Next you'll be saying The Beatles were shite and Charles Dickens is overrated. Tryhards: gotta love em.

Kelvin Mack10zie said...

Lost interest in Star Wars when G.I Joe toys blew up as a shorty. Can't see any reason to ever return to the movies post-puberty.

Dickens is cool, the Beatles were a bunch of wifebeating Scousers who inspired cack like Stone Roses and Oasis.

Cliff Ironblood & The Red Shadows said...

GI Joe? So you're American?

Kelvin Mack10zie said...

Was it still called Action Force then?

Grant James Campbell said...

Palitoy created Action force independent of Hasbro in 81-2. Action Force had its own origins, villains, toys and stories well into the late 80s. Action Force didn't fully become GI Joe until the early 90s.

The films-to-flog-toys thing was done by Thunderbirds and Doctor Who & The Daleks years before Star Wars.

Kelvin Mack10zie said...

All I remember is not caring about Action Force/G.I Joe toys until I saw the Destro + Cobra Commander figures.