Send ZMoney back to jail, imo

So, the Rap game Daphne from Eggheads simultaneously released 2 mixtapes yesterday featuring a combined total of 36 tracks and then didn't bother to include an MP3 of the original definitive solo version of Everything on either of them? Seriously? Not been this annoyed at a Rapper since the calamity which saw Zed Zilla drop his Rents Due mixtape sans the song that sent him viral in the first place, I'm Da Boss.

"Everybody and the money isn't everything
Fuck you mean? Colour green, that be everything!"

ZMoney - Everything
(From the internet; 2012)


So near and yet so far, lad!

Special needs Rap Olympics

"Retarted, retarted - my 'fit game retarted
My whip game retarted, got a bad bitch she retarted

I'm retarted, retarted - my hip game retarted
My dick game retarted, all these raps, man, I'm retarted

I'm retarted, retarted, retarted, retarted
Could use a lotta words, but retarted how I describe it

Retarted, retarted, retarted, retarted
Could use a lotta words, but retarted how I describe it!"

Bubba ft. Max Minelli - Retarted
(From The Traymond Jones Story II : Reloaded album; 2013)


Baton Rogue Rap which owns a thesaurus but doesn't even need to use it because it's clever enough to come up with its own words, thank you very much.

Slangin' humble pie and St Ides in the same sentence

Back when Chinx Drugz's Cocaine Riot 3 dropped in april, I damned How Can I Lose? with faint praise by insisting it was the 'tape's highlight but still little more than "a Superlight-lite retread for Chinx & Harry Fraud". In hindsight, I'm appalled that my dumb ass didn't appreciate such higher-echelon waviness at the time so I'd like to apologise : what How Can I Lose? actually sounds like is a Dame Grease-orchestrated Medieval hair-metal ballad epilogue to Superlight, which is what the French Montana album should've sounded like, innit?

Chinx Drugz - How Can I Lose?
(From Cocaine Riot 3 mixtape; 2013)


Really hate that POP noise Chinx makes at 00:19, though, because it sounds identical to a Facebook notification. What, you mean somebody hasn't replied to that status update I made about Sallie Axl from Big Brother being deeply misunderstood???

I feel it's reasonable to be emoshunul

"Came a long way from takin' the long way home
Ridin' circles around my home
Now I get surveillance on my phone
I'm Al Capone, you Al Pacino : you just play your role
Real n*ggas vouch for me 'cause I'm about my c-notes, now you know"

$tatlito - Aberration
(From Attention, Tithes & Taxes EP; 2013)


2 Things :

1. It annoys me that $tarlito often doesn't even bother to write choruses nowadays, but better hookless tracks like this where he can show his pen/flow off than tracks where his writing and voice are disrupted by schmaltzy Robin Raynelle crooning.

2. That time I compared 'lito's croak flow to Clarence "The Frogman" Henry's vocal gimmick really should've been voted as the best music criticism of 2012.

Wanted dead or alive : part 2050

Anyone care to ID me the sample on A-Mafia's Street Money? It sounds like some 18th century Italian opera jam that Joe & Larry Gallo probably listened to before they set off to turn Albert Anastasia's cabbage into coleslaw; in A-Mafia's hands it's the modern Harlem enforcer-Rapper equivalent of 1997 Q.B Thug-Rap, which isn't quite as exciting but is still a very, very good thing indeed :

"Dedicated to every honey and every girl we date
Gettin' money is my worldly fate until the pearly gates"

A-Mafia - Street Money
(From Street Anthems : The Best Of A-Mafia mixtape; 2013)


For anyone not keeping score, Street Money is the best Italo-Rapso joint since Short Kidd's The Mafia :

Short Kidd - The Mafia
(From Vulcha 101 : Freshman Year mixtape; 2012)

My Dro Called Life

Maybe I'm just in the building feelin' myself too much on this one, but I'd like to think I may have somehow contributed to that Katie Got Bandz X Gunplay song being, y'know, an actual IRL thing with a video and stuff :

Katie Got Bandz ft. Gunplay - Y'All N*ggaz Ain't Hittaz remix
(From the forthcoming Drillary Clinton mixtape; 2013)


The irony, of course, is that Katie is probably oblivious to my existence. Got me feelin' like the Blog Game Brian Krakow :

Say your prayers and take your vitamins

It's very important that chil'ren and adults alike get their iron!

Webbie - Porch
(From Ghetto Stories album; 2003)

Fuckin' right I'm still waiting on Complex's decade anniversary of Ghetto Stories list where Webbie, Turk & Mel, C-Loc, Bun B, Tru Dawg, Lil' Q, and Mouse On Tha Track break down each song in intimate detail!

Fuckin' right I'm still hoping TRILL will drop a remastered deluxe reissue with liner notes from Murder Dog's editor Scott Bejda and the internet's #1 Baton Rogue expert FrankieThaLuckyDog!

Fuckin' right I've never worn denim since I saw that middle-aged cracka wearing Obama jeans in the picture of Mel & Turk signing their distribution deal with Fontana in 2011!

Only time I tell a lie if I was sittin' on the stand

No, your honour, no, your honour - I didn't kill that man!

Great 2012 Chicago songs I'd missed until the Kentucky kid Rey dropped his year end list; essentially, this shit is an unintentionally #Based gooned-out update of LL Cool J's That's A Lie and I still need a tagless MP3 of it. Who got da ripz?

"I been gettin' money since a killer turned twelve, n*gga
I don't have time for these fake fairytale n*ggas
You know you ain't spent twenty thousand on your bail, n*gga
Didn't cha mama tell you tellin' lies you go to Hell, n*gga?"
Boy, you ain't no 'hood n*gga, heard you a suburban n*gga
You ain't sellin' drugs, man, I heard you was a workin' n*gga
But up in your Raps you say you trappin. you be murkin' n*ggas
That's some real clown shit, I think you a real clown n*gga!

Ebone Hoodrich - Why U Lyin'?
(From Youtube/Books & Kush mixtape; 2012)