Yo ho ho and a bottle of Alizé

Ain't gon' lie, I'd never caught wind of Tim Trees' Baltimore classic Band Roll until I read that Shipley Nonstop piece about Tate Kobang's remake of it earlier this week. Shit is like Baltimore's own hard-nosed equivalent of Top Billin' and one of those songs that makes me wonder how if I've been lived without it for all these years. Thus I can't be mad at the Tate Kobang remake even if it doesn't particularly float my boat beyond the notion of a 2015 rapper using Lil' Slim's flow on a song which now has Lyor Cohen moolah behind it.

"My necklace got me a nickname: Treasure Chest
Stay on the job, stay writin', never rest
Money in the bank, collectin' interest
We step in the club, we make 'em undress
My life was tragic, I lived in the trenches
I pay with plastic, American Express"

Tim Trees - Bank Roll
(From Dalton Vol... 1 album; 2000)


Just noticed the retail MP3 of Tate Kobang's remake dropped on friday and, much like Trap Queen, Lyor has once again fucked up the official version of a bubbling regional single by having its rapper spit an awkward 16 on there which sounds as if it belongs an entirely different song. Between this and the existence of Post Malone, the Cohen family can suck a big fat dick in 2015.

Swag To The Future

Travis Porter & Bandit Gang Marco over Mr.2-17 production is the rap equivalent of a fourth Back To The Future movie where Marty & his dad George inadvertently bump into each other in the past again and then accidentally travel forward through the space-time continuum to the hospital where Marty's missus is giving birth to his son. Betcha you'll find that Quez has already started disappearing from the Make It Rain and Wobble videos as the universe struggles to comprehend 3 generations of Atlanta Swag-Rap on the same song and attempts to course-correct itself.

Travis Porter ft. Bandit Gang Marco - Blue Flame
(From SAQ mixtape; 2015)


Ayo Tough Love - your song with Ginuwine is cool but Mr.2-17 already has the best Pony interpolation of 2015.

Does the Compton OST turn out the lights from I Need A Doctor?

"EEEEEEWWWWWWWWW!"

Still can't muster up the enthusiasm to check Compton out. Should I listen to it just to the erase the memory of Dre's last single being an Eminem studio scrap with Skylar Grey or should I just stick with the handful of new Warren G & Nate Dogg songs?

Get Grip Good

Bummed to hear the sad news about Grip Plyaz's battle with cancer and spiraling medical bills. There's a host of ALT-lanta rappers nowadays that owe their whole shticks and careers to Grip who need to chip in some money right now, yet they're all missing the key ingredient which make his music such a blast: that it's made by a disgracefully funny bastard who legitimately did grow up bumping Dungeon Family and D4L in equal measure.

At his best, Grip is one of Atlanta's finest purveyors of minimalist-rap on some La Mont YoungBloodZ type shit. To try and draw attention to his current situation, I put together a best of Grip Plyaz playlist for Audiomack which showcases his sheer commitment to bad taste, his ability to say so much with so few words, and his distinctive knack for making barely-there tracks knock like Black Market. You can donate to the Get Grip Good fund HERE and bump the playlist below:


No Died (In Yo' Pussy) because that was always a better concept than a song, IMHO.

A recent-ish jams 4 u compilation part 3

Like the Evil Dead movies and them fit sisters from The Corrs, all good things come in threes. Consequently, here's the third compilation of 2015 songs I'm feelin'. Doesn't matter if you're ridin' Mercedes, mono scooter or mass transit 'cause these songs will fanute your commute.

1. Vic Spencer & TREE - Once (2015)
2. Kap G - Andelay (2015)
3. RJ - If It Ain't Ace (2015)
4. King Los ft. R. Kelly - Glory To The Lord (2015)
5. Hardini - I'm Bick (2015)
6. DonMonique - Pilates (Kendall, Kylie, Miley) (2015)
7. Psycho Les ft. Royal Flush, Tragedy Khadafi & Illa Ghee - Thunder Bells (2015)
8. Mouse On Tha Track - Grass Greener (2015)
9. Warren G ft. Nate Dogg - My House (2015)
10. A-Wax - Never Saw It (2015)
11. A-Wax - EverLasting Money (2015)

~~~> DOWNLOAD IT HERE <~~~
(BTW, you can find the first installment here, and the second installment here.)

Born To Audiomack 2

Already explained that the 'mack is mah spot so I've decided to upload some of my compilations for everyone's streamable pleasure. Naturally, had to start with the best of Lil' Chris from earlier this year to cook your data plans like some muhfuckin' french fries:

Just sayin', bruv: the dance edition

Hot Takes on me like Morten Harket, dance moves on me like John Sergeant.

If you're planning on writing a thinkpiece about YouTube dance stars like Kemo, Meechie or 1UP Society and you fail to acknowledge that Fresh Squad are pioneers of the artform, then you should have your earnings frozen until you've learned their entire Crank Dat routine:


Until I hear it out in the wild at a Westwood party then IHeartMemphis' Hit The Quan is one of those dance records that I prefer as a YouTube collection of its best Vine clips rather than as a song:


In 25 years time, rap historians are gonna treat the videos of Mr. Hit Dat Hoe and TReal Lee bustin' moves in Prince Rick's neighbourhood with the same reverence that they treat those Style Wars scenes where the Rock Steady Crew snap on Frosty Freeze's mother and breakdance in the park to Busy Bee & A.J's "D.J Bust a Nut, in your face and in your butt" live routine:


(BTW, Bugati Bieber & co's "I can still smell her perfume" dance moves in the Confident video are a total rip-off of TReal Lee & Mr. Hit Dat Hoe's "you smell somethin' stanky? Yeah I be the shit, bitch" dance moves from the above video. If I'm lyin' may every dancing dog from Britain's Got Talent die tonight. How 'bout that?)

One M, two M, three M, four

Mouse On Tha Track - Bag Full Of Money
(From No Commercials mixtape; 2015)


When Mouse goes minimal he really knows how to make a molehill bump like a mountain. Bag Full Of Money here needs a promo featuring Mouse & his daughter Prestyn throwin' shapes like they did in the Get It Back video in front of a green screen juxtaposition of Boosie countin' money pon road and the proto-#problematic Ted Dibiase sketch where he cheats a black kid out of $500. Everybody's got a price BAHAHAHA!