Thursday 6 November 2014

Generic list post: 10 songs by rap crews from the past 12 months that are empirically better than anything on this crappy new Migos 'tape

This is my own personal Truman Show
You are all actors working for Lyor Cohen on the 300 Entertainment payroll.

That's the only explanation which could possibly justify the ridiculous t'internet hyperbole surrounding this awful new Migos mixtape. Of course, this is no different than when ironic dickheads claimed No Label 2 was better than Illmatic, but at least that 'tape contained one bonafide classic which made you forget the multitude of sins spread across its other 24 dud songs. All this new Rich N*gga Timeline 'tape has is a couple of aiight songs and 17 sluggish tracks which make me think that Lyor's vision of sending them off to Sweden to record an album of bork-pop bangerz with Stargate and Benny & Björn from ABBA wouldn't be such a bad idea after all.

If there was ever a group who need to adopt the current Rae Sremmurd business model of drip-feeding a single out every few months, it's Migos: these guys couldn't make a half-decent mixtape if their mansion's shared closet of rhinestone t-shirts & pleather high-tops with 7 different velcro straps instead of laces depended on it. R.I.P to Nate Dogg - I Got Love but I also had to Regulate. Thus, here's a generic list of 12 rap crew songs released in the past 12 months which empirically obliterate anything on this new shitty Migos 'tape into smithereens.

Migos ft. Young Thug - YRN (2013)
Rae Sremmurd - No Type (2014)
S.B.E - I Feel Like (2013)
Pushaz Ink - When I Was Gone (2014)
Young Money - Senile (2014)
Rich Gang - Freestyle (2014)
Sicko Mobb - Fiesta (2013)
Trill Fam - Pray For Me (2014)
HS87 - Grindin' My Whole Life (2014)
The 99 Percent - Shabooyah! (2014)


Queezy said...

"Naw FR" tho

Kelvin Mack10zie said...

Wet Wet by Rich The Kid & Migos bodies that and every other song on this mixtape.

Kelvin Mack10zie said...

Also, my favourite part of that recent Migos story on Fader was the part about Lyor sending his baggage handler to Atlanta to listen to No Label 2 in Couch K's car.

It was like, wow, there's some poor bastard out there who's actually been forced to listen to all 25 songs of that piece of shit from front to back.

CrowleyHead said...

Worst aspect of this is that Skippa Da Flippa is being forced to write for Takeoff by QC Entertainment in order to prop up this myth, which is of no value because everyone has mistaken Quavo as the genius. And now that QC is entering the "NEW ATLANTA" sellout game with OG Mako-fish, this man's career is over before it could begin.

Zara said...

A Migos/Abba collaboration would be the best!!

Soundcircuit Snitch said...

Digging "All Good", "Nawfside" and "Naw FR".

Rest is bland.

Zwoop nation said...

I miss YRN

d said...

Its almost like these people have no taste and just mainly into being on the right side of history. The Rich Gang tape/every Young Thug or Quan tapes overrated too imo, theyre all good for max 5 or 6 keepers each

Im hardly one to judge tbf, never had much motivation to trawl tnt/thizzler/top tapes whatever for the gold

Grindin My Whole Lifes the shit, man.

Kelvin Mack10zie said...

I probably should have included Flava over Freestyle because it's more of a group song.

David said...

Is "Freestyle" a group song at all?

at any rate I enjoy your migos polemicism even if I think they have more good songs than you do.

On this tape, "All Good" is pretty fire IMO

Kelvin Mack10zie said...

I think Freestyle is the song that best displays the chemistry Thug + Quan have as a duo, but I do kinda regret not picking Flava.

bow bow bow bow pop that booty said...

I thought you were being harsh here but I'm listening to the tape and I see what you mean. On a song by song basis I actually like it but its really the same thing again and again. They do a good Gucci impersonation but Gucci had more variety and felt less laboured. The fact there's three of them doesn't help
I think they could make a great five track EP.

The hyperbole is probably down to the fact that they can really rappity rap. Still think I prefer Bobby Schmurda's EP to this! And Boosie is on another level to them both.

Mind you most mixtapes are ridiculously overlong. Wonder why there's this culture of releasing 20 track mixtapes anyway.

Kelvin Mack10zie said...

It's frankly ridiculous that the mixtape format still exists in 2014.

I'd gladly wave goodbye to mixtapes AND albums altogether at this point; archaic formats which serve little purpose anymore.