Thursday, 29 October 2020

Martorial Elegance: The Ice Isn't Right

Before Ice-T was the the O.G: Original Gangster, he was the O.G Andre Macassi on the hot tarmac of South Central. This particular outfit woulda been perfect for poolside loungin' in the High Rollers video if Ice hadn't have f**ked it up from the knees down like David James on Strictly Come Dancing. So nearly fly and yet so far - why you tryna look like Borg and Jordan at the SAME DAMN TIME? Tennis garms and Basketball gear don't mix like two dicks and no bitch, find your outfit in some serious shit.

Ice-T - High Rollers
(From Power album; 1988)

Sunday, 25 October 2020

Harriet Hot Tubman

Gzus Piece - Hot Tub Time Machine
(From Soxndrawz album; 2020)

File this under 'Midwesternplayalisticbubblebathmuzik.' After a couple of weeks, I'm settling on this as my de facto favourite song from Gzus Piece's new album.

PS: there's a cool song from this album which was cut from the retail/streaming tracklist but is still hidden on Soundcloud. Shit's called Shout Out To OJ Simpson and I use it as the secret B-side to Hot Tub Time Machine.

Tuesday, 20 October 2020

Instamagnetic MC

Straight out the f**kin' archives of Khayree's Instagram, here's a snippet of an unreleased Mac Dre demo from 1992. Dre may have been Too Hard For Da F*ckin' Radio but he ain't too hard for da RadioShack cassette deck. Can Khayree & Studio Tone just collate all Dre's demo tracks/Crest tape songs and release them on one album plz?

Sunday, 18 October 2020

Clock Of The Heart (no Culture Club)

"Do I even have to mention, thee bathroom is like another dimension
What goes on inside is something I can never explain, time exists on an entirely different plane"

Homeboy Sandman - Waiting On My Girl
(From Don't Feed The Monster album; 2020)

Time waits for no man, yet man waits for every woman. This is reality Rap - we all go through it! The realest shit Homeboy Sandman ever wrote or wot? Would love to know what Quelle Chris sampled here because this beat sounds like a lost DOOM production from the King Gheedorah album.

Saturday, 17 October 2020

Late pass: EPMD'Angelo

D'Angelo ft. Redman - Me & Those Dreamin' Eyes Of Mine (Def Squad remix)
(From Me & Those Dreamin' Eyes Of Mine remixes single; 1996)

Damn, why'd nobody ever hip me to the existence of this remix? TBQH, this mix floats my Billy Ocean more than the original - you've got the same damn D'Angelo syrupy goodness, but a refreaked groove by Erick Sermon and two quick verses of flagrant du Redman featuring an amusing homme pas. A song like this makes me wish the ol' Funk Doc had been let loose on more 90's Rap & Bullshit remixes.

What's yer favourite Erick Sermon remix then? I wanna say mines is Redman's Can't Wait remix 2 but that's #actually the original version in disguise. So, it's between Redman's Rockafella remix and Keith Murray's Dip Dip Di remix where Erick Sermon transformed two songs I don't particularly like into two songs I do indeed like.

Friday, 16 October 2020

One 4 the Britz (and Ghanaianz)

Donae'O - Partey Hard
(From YouTube; 2020)

9/10 for sheer opportunism here: Donae'O remakes his own U.K Funky classic Party Hard in tribute to Arsenal signing Thomas Partey. Maybe it deserves a 10/10 since the video is hosted by Arsenal Fan TV and features multiple annoying mugs from the channel. Not entirely sure that the proverbial roof of the Emirates Stadium has ever been "on fire", but let's not let deetz get in the way of bantz. Anyhoo, it's all fun and games until Donae'O ends up with egg on his face if Partey turns out to be the Ghanaian Denilson innit?

Tuesday, 13 October 2020

Bus' The Facts

Busta Rhymes - As I Come Back
(From Genesis album; 2001)

Always my favourite Busta Rhymes track with The Neptunes track because that beat was so very obviously a bespoke creation for Busta. In hindsight, As I Come Back was as close as New York got to its own equivalent of Crunk and its a pity nobody else took the baton and ran with it. I wanna say that bassline is pure U.K darkside Rave but that'd make me sound like Grimey Simey and noone should ever wanna sound like Grimey Simey when talking about Rap.

Monday, 12 October 2020

A bum note

"Whassup Brie?
Whassup Kei?
Whassup Lisa? Damn, I want all three!
Ohhh Ashlee, ohhh Ashlee
I get hard when she walk past me"

DJ Chose ft. BeatKing - Thick
(From YouTube; 2020)

Put a badunkadunk on it! Ain't gonna lie, I much prefer this to BeatKing's own Then Leave. In fact, I'd opine that Thick is the best Booty-Chatter™ slumper since Back It Up by Trap Beckham & Flo Milli. Three is still the magic number for DJ Chose & BeatKing; for the rest of us, however, good things come in twos like arse cheeks.

Saturday, 10 October 2020

Birds can do Baton Rouge Brawl Music™ too (part 3)

"Putcho cups up, let's get f*cked up!"

GetEmTree - Only Way Is Up Step
(From YouTube; 2020)

One of these days yous lot are gonna realise that GetEmTree is Baton Rouge's answer to Katie Got Bandz. Until then I'm gonna keep wildin' out to her music, and keep myself amused by the YouTube comments which mistake her for a him.

Friday, 9 October 2020

Stupid Doo Dude Dumb

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Treal Playa's @devindude420 #Tbt

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When regional G.O.A.T's collide or wot? Sux these two never recorded any music together because they'd have surely had great chemistry beyond their shared penchant for being photographed on the bog for their respective 1998 albums. Imagine Dre on a Devin song like Go Somewhere or Devin on a Dre song like Dreganomics. Alternatively, you can always just pretend that Pawns In The Game was a Domo beat for Devin's first album which Dre nicked for himself.

Mac Dre - Pawns In The Game
(From Khayree's vaults; 1997/The Musical Life Of Mac Dre Vol 3 album; 2014)

Thursday, 8 October 2020

Jam On It part 2

Mac Dre & Khayree - Times R Gettin' Crazy (acoustic)
(From Billy Jam's HipHopSlam KUSF radio show; 1991)

Ripped an MP3 of Mac Dre & Khayree's live performance of Times R Gettin' Crazy from Billy Jam's HipHopSlam radio show. Download that shit here. Officially, the only acoustic cover version of a Rap song which doesn't make me go wild like Blutarsky and smash guitars.

Wednesday, 7 October 2020

Stop eatin' me like chips with no cheese, bitch I'm nachos

"I hit up my insurance, I'm at your door like I'm Geico
Verses cutthroat, I'm in your dreams like I'm Psycho
Don't say I'm wrong, when I pull a left I'm really right tho""

ShuggyBo - What I Like
(From YouTube; 2020)

File this under 'somebody was bound to slappify Tiny Tim's Livin' In The Sunlight, Lovin' In The Moonlight eventually, huh?' Shout outs to ShuggyBo for makin' Sacramento sound like Loompaland on this one, and for havin' the most quintessentially NorCal Rap name ever.

Sunday, 4 October 2020

Brief thoughts on the leaked Jay Electronica album

Jay Electronica? More like Jay He's One Song Wonder amirite. Deepest condolences to anybody who genuinely thought this album would "save Hip-Hop" lolz. Even Saigon's mediocre The Greatest Story Never Told LP was better than this meandering nonsense. This shit is just a half-arsed Killah Priest album with shout outs to Puffy and Kate Middleton.

PS: the next time your tinfoil hat stoner m8 tells you that the Rothschild family secretly control the world, remind him that the Rothschild family couldn't even control one of their heiresses from getting babbied up by a lazy drunken crackpot Rapper like Jay Electronica.

Friday, 2 October 2020

The Jerk part 2

"One call, they pull up fast
Wrong move that pistol blast
I'm dressed in all black, match my glock, I think I'm Shaft"

YG - Swag
(From My Life 4 Hunnid album; 2020)

Also feelin' this recent YG single on the 2Pac Jerkur tip, although I can't decide whether it's Jerk in Future-Swag clothing or Future-Swag disguised as Jerk? Either way, goin' back to the future has worked a treat on this and Out On Bail. Homie shoulda brought his Le Coq Sportif sweatsuit from the Toot It And Boot It video back for this one.

Cot damn, the new album tracklist looks like yer bogstandard major label ol' spreadsheet sounding arse bullshit, though. Just what 2020 needs - another Rap album featuring Chris Brown, Tyga, Gunna, and Lil' Tjay.

Thursday, 1 October 2020

Can't truss 'em

Beastie Boys - Rhymin' & Stealin'
(From Licensed To Ill album; 1986)

Here at The Martorialist we live by the code that you can't trust anyone who turns their nose up at 80's Beastie Boys. Son, the Ali Baba and the 40 Thieves breakdown from Rhymin' & Stealin' shits on your whole life and your whole bloodline.

Were the Beasties the first Rap group to release a VHS tape or was it Run-D.M.C? Please, don't ask Dart Adams or he'll just start ranting about he's the only man alive who knows when the Dungeons & Dragons pinball machine was released in north America.

Tuesday, 29 September 2020

Generic list post: September 2020

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when Mello-T was finally back on the BBC. (Albeit unseen footage of Mello-T when Louis Theroux revisited him in 2004.)

Mac Dre & Khayree - Times R Gettin' Crazy (acoustic) (1991)
Chilee Powdah - Nuthin' But Game (1996)
DB Tha General - Upgrade Em 3 (2020)
YG - Out On Bail (2020)
Sire Sensai - 1999 (1999)
Hollywood Holt & Million $ Mano - The Show (2011)
Mic Terror - Ride (2020)
Gzus Piece - Taladega (2020)
Mick Jenkins - Carefree (2020)
YN Jay & Louie Ray - Reflection (2020)
GetEmTree - Intro (2020)
Andwella - Hold On To Your Mind (1970)
SAULT - Son Shine (2020)

Other notables: Mac J's Go 1st makes a decent B-side to OldSkoo; Veeze's Law N Order is a notable new entry into the TV theme tune Rap canon; nice to hear a 3 minute Valee solo song and see him wearin' Adidas Superstar tracksuits again; Hotbox was right about CeeFineAss' Payback; Jmil was right about Durand Bernarr's Summons being a dope Nate Dogg homage and Jacquees dis at the same damn time; judging from the snippets of Pullin' More Strings, it sounds like A-Wax is supplying me Spotify playlist bunk with no bass in its trunk.

Saturday, 26 September 2020

Generic list post: 2005 postscript bonus beats

Word to your mum, I'm in my own world. Thus I had no idea Noz was bloggin' again until someone linked me his Best 100 Rap songs of 2005 list. Other than him picking the wrong Edan song (Funky Rhyming FTW) it's a great list dedicated to the greatest year of the 2000's. Such a great year, in fact, that it's possible to keep going with songs by artists who didn't make the Noz list (technically in a couple of cases, tbf.)

M.O.P - Instigator
Fam-Lay - Amalance
Dirt McGirt - Lift Ya Skirt (12" solo mix)
Killer Mike ft. Three 6 Mafia - Get 'Em Shawty
Maino - Rumors
Bailey ft. Dave Chappelle - Fuck Yo' Couch
Purple City - It Ain't Easy
Mac Dre, Boss Hog, B-Luv & Husalah - Hustle
Husalah - Since '88
Mobb Deep - Cobra
Saigon ft. Kool G. Rap - The Letter P (remix)
Ludacris - Number One Spot
Playaz Circle ft. Shawnna - Gucci Bag
Blaq Poet - Bang Dis!
A-Wax - Money / Life
Woodie & A-Wax - The Yoc & The Burg
Redman - Gilla House Check
Down Bad Ent. - Keep Rollin'
Black Rob - Ready
Dru Down - Summer In The City
Clinton Sparks ft. Beanie Sigel & Peedi Crakk - Philly
Consequence - Caught Up In The Hype
Jakki Tha Motamouth - Cleptobrainiac

Thursday, 24 September 2020

The Jerk

YG - Out On Bail
(From YouTube; 2020)

Just when I'd got outta the habit of checkin' for new YG, he pulls me back in with FTP and his new single here. Ratchet is dead, baby - this is YG reborn as 2Pac Jerkur. Half these rappers can't be bothered to write hooks nowadays, so I appreciate a song which is almost like two big hooks goin' back-and-forth on some EPMD shit for half of its two and a half minute run-time.

Wednesday, 23 September 2020

Hit The Flaw

"Luckily I just touch the streets sucka free with my company
Hell nah I don't remember your baby-dad, he's a chump to me
Dungarees sit on some number threes comfortably in some bucket seats
Ashin' joints out the window when crackin' up at your f*ckery"

Gzus Piece - Taladega
(From YouTube; 2020)

Honestly, this is exactly the sort of soaring Midwest fly shit that I want from a new Gzus Piece single until it gets all Lord Jamar's laundry list of complaints during the 2nd verse. But in this shite sandwich year you've gotta embrace the flaws and get your jollies wherever you can.

Monday, 21 September 2020

Please give a warm welcome to our special gust...

"Put that on my momma, 15 I was a young boss
Red dot on his nose, that's a Rudolph"

DB Tha General - Upgrade Em 3
(From 10 Years Strong album; 2020)

Oakland's Mr. Methane back up on The Martorialist. This one's a treat for us seasoned DB Tha General connoisseurs who've not kept up with his new music in recent years - the long-awaited third installment of his Upgrade Em song series. DJ Upgrade's subtle Jail House Rap interpolation means it also functions as a Rockin' In My Blues sequel for the seasoned DB connoisseur.

Saturday, 19 September 2020

Craic Your Body

Andwella - Hold On To Your Mind
(From World's End album; 1970)

Psychedelic rockers from Northern Ireland invented House music in 1970. Listen to the opening piano on this song for the proof. Like Curtis McClain nearly sang on Marshall Jefferson's Move Your Body, gotta have Hop House all night long! Anyhoo, these fellas were a big influence on Thin Lizzy, apparently.

Bonus 1970 beats:

Ennio Morricone - Svolta Definitiva
(From Città violenta soundtrack; 1970)

Charlie motherf*ckin' Bronson always brought the best out of The Vividest Composer. Seriously - who'd have ever thunk that The Maestro™ could compose a song that sounds like The Stooges jamming with The Mohawks? Alas, ya host can neither confirm nor deny whether the movie lives up to the soundtrack

Friday, 18 September 2020

Birds can do Baton Rouge Brawl Music™ too (part 2)

"My aunty name is Kita, my other aunty Rita
They both 'bout that cheddar, they be on that Velveeta"

GetEmTree - Intro
(From YouTube; 2020)

Talk about a bird's eye view. Best way to describe GetEmTree's brand of henchwoman Baton Rouge Brawl Music: Webbie without a willy or tomboy with a Tommy drum gun? Doz that kept both eyes shut previously should also peep Opp Watching.

"I just got a call from my dawg, he comin' home
I just dropped some fondue on his books and on the phone
F*ck 12, free my n*gga right or wrong
Bitch, 'cause all I speak is facts in every song"

GetEmTree - Opp Watching
(From YouTube; 2020)

**Edit** Peep Johnny Rap's epic 230 song and rising modern Baton Rouge playlist.

Wednesday, 16 September 2020

Loyal T

"No, I don't think that you dumb
But I know what I woulda done
And I don't f*ck with no n*gga that blocked me from feedin' my son"

Mic Terror - Ride
(From The Rona album; 2020)

Dramatic piano banger alert! A song about some real shit which gets real specific about one of Mic T's ex-m8s at the end of verse one. Nowadays I don't give a f*ck about gossip unless it's a stock tip, but the aforementioned part of the song is a heartfelt explanation of why Mic no longer fuxwit his longtime producer Mano. Song hits hard because it's a universal concept with a dash of anecdotal personal context.

"But we be killin' shows like haters kills hoes
Got me throwin' out flows just like blowin' my nose"

Hollywood Holt & Million $ Mano - The Show
(From the internet; 2011)

Bonus Treated Crew beats: there's a buncha Mic Terror, Gzus Piece/White Gzus songs I wish had blown up, and then there's Hollywood Holt's best song here. Sometimes the obviously corny sample is the absolutely correct sample.

Monday, 14 September 2020

Late pass like it's 1999

Sire Sensai - 1999
(From Verbally Diseased ft. The Clinic's Operation Contamination album; 1999)

Via Tha Barber's YouTube. If one of Jiggs & Cheeks had a solo song on Twista's first Legit Ballaz group album then it'd probably sound like this. It's all spaghetti, tho, because Sire Sensai was #actually makin' music years before Jiggs & Cheeks or Legit Ballaz.

Bonus beats: best video Tha Barber ever put me onto is obvs the main single from Twista's second Legit Ballaz group album. The video is Chicago's answer to the Flava In Ya Ear remix, while the song itself is the ultimate in Midwesternplayalisticjiggyshit. Watch for Twista's proto-"DATAZZ!" face at 3 seconds in.

Twista & Legit Ballaz ft. Johnny P - Ball Wit Us
(From Legit Ballin: New Testament 2k Street Scriptures - Volume 2 compilation; 2001)

Friday, 11 September 2020

What happened to Piece? (Part 2)

Mic Terror ft. Gzus Piece & Bruus - Forever Gangster
(From The Rona album; 2020)

This now has a video. Good thing it does too because it's the obvious single on Mic T's new album, and I need to rectify a slight mistake from first time round: it starts as a space-age Return Of The G and ends as the return of Big Moe from the grave and ends as the return of Jodeci. Everybody played they position like Mourinho's Porto team.

Bonus beats: every single needs a B-side so I nominate One Day as the flipside to Forever Gangster. Don't even mind the faint use of Auto-Tune on this one because it's got that classique Greg Nice echo to it.

Mic Terror ft. Bruus - One Day
(From The Rona album; 2020)

Tuesday, 8 September 2020

Generic list post: Neptunes edition

Before The Chad & The Virgin, there was The Chad & The Pharrell. Neptunes productions are a hot topic right now so lemme add my tuppence. Top 20 fave Neptunes produced Rap songs. No repeat artists and no order of preference. You know the Neptunes were 5 star general producers of their era when they've got me enjoying early noughties Jay-Z in 2020.

Fam-Lay - Skrung Owt (2006)
N.O.R.E - Nothin' (2002)
Ma$e ft. Puff Daddy - Lookin' At Me (1998)
Slim Thug - Like A Boss (2004)
Mystikal ft. Pharrell - Shake Ya Ass (2000)
The Clipse - Grindin' (2002)
Birdman ft. The Clipse - What Happened To That Boy? (2003)
Fabolous - Young'n (Holla Back) (2001)
Ludacris - Southern Hospitality (2000)
Busta Rhymes - As I Come Back (2001)
Philly's Most Wanted - Suckas (2001)
ODB ft. Kelis - Got Your Money (1999)
N*E*R*D ft. Lee Harvey & Vita - Lapdance (2001)
Snoop Dogg ft. Pharrell - Drop It Like It's Hot (2004)
Jadakiss - Knock Yourself Out (2001)
Foxy Brown ft. Pharrell - Magnetic (2003)
Rosco P. Coldchain ft. Pharrell - Delinquent (2003)
Nelly - Hot In Herre (2002)
Black Rob - Business As Usual (2003)
Jay-Z - LA-LA-LA (2003)

Bonus beats: anyone down for a game of favourite fake-Neptunes productions?

Loon ft. Kelis - How You Want That? (2003)
Yukmouth - Stuntastic (2003)
Clinton Sparks ft. Black Rob - Knock 'Em Out (2005)
Jim Jones ft. Max B & Mel Matrix - Sour Diesel (2006)
Curren$y - Scared Of Monstas (2009)