Saturday, 21 July 2018

Born to Audiomack: 2018 jams

It's about that time to make sense of 2018 Rap thus far, so here's a playlist of ya host's favourite songs of the past 7 months. Granted, I'm limited to what's already on Audiomack/what I can be bothered to upload to Audiomack, but at least 95% of my 2018 essentials are included here. One song per artist, natch.

1 BlocBoy JB - No Chorus Pt 11
2. DaBoii of SOB X RBE - Onna Gang
3. Kendrick Lamar & SOB X RBE - Paramedic
4. 70th Street Carlos - Wreck
5. WNC Ram Bam - G Warfare
6. Dru Down ft. Mistah F.A.B - Streets Is Cold
7. Tay-K - After You
8. Husalah - Bad Young Thang
9. Queen Key ft. Dreezy - Ha
10. Maine Musik - Soulja Slim Flow 2
11. E-40 & B-Legit ft. Stresmatic - Meet The Dealers
12. Rich Blue - Hands Hands
13. Valee ft. Jeremih - Womp Womp
14. Level ft. Mouse On Tha Track & Boosie BadAzz - DFWT (Remix)
15. City Girls - Period (We Live)
16. Mozzy - Who I Am

Wednesday, 18 July 2018

Just sayin', bruv # 16

The intro of Sum 41's Fat Lip video is a more credible attempt at Canadian Rap than anything ever recorded by Drake.

Shoreline Mafia are just Brockhampton if they'd met in the NoJumper YouTube comments rather than on the KanyeToThe message board.

New Yorkers under the age of 25 should be banned from making Rap music in 2018.

Apart from a handful of exceptions, New Yorkers over the age of 25 should also be banned from making Rap music in 2018.

Kreayshawn's Punk cover of Mac Dre's Not My Job is the only good Rock song of the 2010's thus far.

Don't get it twisted, though - Husalah's Bad Young Thang is the best Mac Dre tribute of 2018.

And speaking of Husalah, he's the ONLY American in the Rap industry who didn't make a complete tit of himself when attempting to comment on "Soccer" during the 2018 World Cup.

When the history books are written, Chance The Rapper will solely be remembered as the annoying twat who ruined Justin Bieber's Confident.

The only good songs to come out on G.O.O.D Music this summer are both by Valee.

What's Hell? Hell is reading Dart Adams droning on and on about video game release dates in his Tweets.

Monday, 16 July 2018

Shameless Re-Up Gong!

It was all good just a week ago and now it's even better. Updated my 70th Street Carlos loosies playlist with a song I'd previously missed - shit's called Rich N*gga Bitch and it's kinda like I Got A Story To Tell on a Baton Rouge budget, as produced by Mannie Fresh.

The petition to get FrankieThaLuckyDog to review some WNC music starts here! ~~~> ________

Sunday, 15 July 2018

Rich Blue ate my hamster

"I'm a Soviet, I don't give a fuck
In the Soviets we drink vodka, brah"

Sublime marriage of music and moving image or wot? This upcoming song by the Hands Hands guy is a new entry in the Martorialist canon of potentially-killer songs from the past few years which only exist in snippet form currently. The others?

Foxx & Boosie - Untitled (2015)
Ezale - Cold Game Chronicles (2016)
Mannie Fresh & Nef The Pharoah - Untitled (2017)
Ya Boy Big Choo - Hustla (Remix) (2017)
70th Street Carlos - On Me (2018)

BTW, that's yer allotment from Si Mane Price. New name: Kelvin Mack10zie.

Friday, 13 July 2018


Regrets, I've had a few, but at least I've never wasted my precious time on Earth listening to Drake albums like some of youz lot lol. PSA, Tamia's comeback single is still 2018's only good song outta Canada, and that shit now has a video:

Tamia - Leave It Smokin'
(From YouTube; 2018)

From Drake and Celine Dion to Michael Bublé and Mindbender Futurama, Canadians have always been varying shades of horrific when making music about love/lust. Thus, it's a major miracle that Tamia can drop a Legit Bedroom Jam 4 Ladies & Gentlemen Alike™ 20 years after So Into You.

Wednesday, 11 July 2018

They're Coming Home

Streetz already knew Ill Phil Collins is the only Englishman who can bring that ever-elusive It home innit.

Bone Thugs-n-Harmony ft. Phil Collins - Home
(From Thug World Order album; 2003)

Sod Nas, Our Boys™ have Let Diana Down.

Monday, 9 July 2018

Born To Audiomack: 2018 70th Street Carlos joints playlist

70th Street Carlos AKA Boosie FatAzz AKA Spaz Dillenger AKA Chubb Glock AKA Gumby Knuckles AKA Godfather Dumb AKA Sauce Water. Someone's gotta wrap the best of his 2018 loosies up like a mummy, so it might as well be me. One of the few new rappers whose style is totally his own - all fact, not an imho.

Thursday, 5 July 2018

Mac Dre Day

Mac Dre - Just Listen (demo)
(From Khayree's vaults; 198?)

Celebrate what would have been Mac Dre's 48th birthday today with this unreleased late 80's demo intro over Fred Wesley & The JB's Same Beat. Khayree really shoulda put a CDQ version of this on his first The Musical Life Of Mac Dre compilation.

Wednesday, 4 July 2018

Reasons why I love YouTube part whatever

File this under ‘fam-made videos for songs which never had videos but really should have’ and ‘rap songs which mention Prince Naseem.’ Dunno why Nana Be Like wasn't a single because Foxy performed it live on Queen Latifah's TV show and it's easily the best song on the Broken Silence album.

Kinda cute that Foxy added a bunch of patois to the O.G 1999 mixtape version of Nana Be Like after she started dating Spragga Benz in 2000. You haven't really caught feelings for your boo until you start adopting some of her/his regional dialect innit/int'it.

Tuesday, 3 July 2018

Obligatory annual post about some U.K tune featuring Giggs

"Buff chicks, big man's bonkin' that
Big whips, big man's honkin' that"

Mr. Eazi ft. Giggs - London Town
(From London Town single; 2018)

No surprise this one's a jam because Giggs has BEEN sounding good over U.K Afrobeats since Moelogo's The Baddest. First good Roadrapfrobeats tune ya host has heard this year.

Related: previously.

Saturday, 30 June 2018

Generic list post: June 2018

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when PJW pretended to be into football. Pull the other one, Paul.

Jimmy Wopo - Elm Street 2 (2017)
70th Street Carlos - Big Knots (2018)
WNC Ram Bam - G Warfare (2018)
Dru Down ft. Mistah F.A.B - Streets Is Cold (2018)
Queen Key ft. Dreezy - Ha (2018)

Other notables: Dancing Man was the only song I was kinda feelin' on that new J Hus EP; wanted to like Rico Nasty's Rage but I just can't get with Slipknotcore Rap.

Tuesday, 26 June 2018

Slangin' humble pie and St. Ides in the same sentence

"16 doin' my thing, outchea fuckin' n*gga's parents
16 doin' my thing, probably stuck a n*gga's parents"

Jimmy Wopo - Elm Street 2
(From YouTube; 2017)

In hindsight, ya host was way too harsh about the late Jimmy Wopo's Elm Street 2. Shit's a slap to be treasured, so who gives a shit if it isn't quite as good as the original? As ever, writing about music isn't a bunch of declarative statements forever fixed in stone, but the ever-evolving conversation in your own head made public. Sometimes you get it right, sometimes you get it wrong, and sometimes you're kinda slow because certain songs just hit the pleasure centre in your brain late.

Another heartfelt R.I.P to Jimmy Wopo, the only rapper of this era who sounds like he should have been the guitarist in some mid 80s New York Hardcore band.

Sunday, 24 June 2018

Reasons why I love YouTube part whatever

Black Sheep performing that song live at MTV Spring Break in 1992 with Cypress Hill and Smooth B joining them onstage as impromptu back-up dancers. Clip is so hype it can make you temporarily forget that The Choice Is Yours (Revisited) is one of those legitimate 10/10 classics to have been ruined by lazy DJs overplaying it - ubiquity's gonna kill your favourite 90s banger quicker than a favour or a bullet.

Friday, 22 June 2018

Heavy C

"Catch your baby momma, make my young'n's steal her purse
I know a lotta n*ggas want me in the hearse
But I'm strapped you fuckin' clown, you muhfuckin' jerk
I got n*ggas in black all round your house, you 'bout to get merked"

70th Street Carlos - Big Knots
(From t'internet; 2018)

Really wish rappers wouldn't invite visits from the Grim Reaper upon themselves in their #barz like that. Here at The Martorialist we definitely ain't tryna see 70th Street Carlos become Baton Rouge's answer to Heavy D on some The Overweight Lover's In The Hearse type shit.

Anyhoo, Big Knots initially felt like a disappointment after last month's trifecta of Bang Bang, Sprite, and Wreck, but shit's a grower like chickweed on your granddad's allotment. A proper bells of doom 4 Horsemen Of The Apocalypse entrance theme.

Tuesday, 19 June 2018

R.I.P Jimmy Wopo

Pittsburgh really is the pits, huh? Pour out a little Snapple for the tragically slain Jimmy Wopo, now cursed to be "that other rapper who died on the same day XXXHamster got snuffed". It's a mystery Scooby Doo why it's always gotta be rappers who die - it's about time some Drum & Bass producers and Death Metal bands get sent back to the essence instead to #RestoreTheBalance

It doesn't even matter that Wopo blew his creative load early in his career with Elm Street, Walkin' Bomb Pt. 2, and Nanana because a smattering of brilliant songs will always make up for a whole lotta so-so material thereafter. That said, ya host still wishes that Back Door was a solo track because that one had to potential to be Wopo's best song until Sonny Digital decided to lay a ho-hum guest verse on it.

R.I.P Wopo - I'll never be able to see Ousmane Dembélé without thinking he's a dead ringer 4 u.

Monday, 18 June 2018

You 48 and you still slappin'? Mmmmm

"The streets talkin', them bullets like HUUUUUMMMM
No name for the blame but a barrel of a gun
But, whoooooa, them streets is cold
And that's the same thing as hot when you on my block, let's go!"

Dru Down ft. Mistah F.A.B - Streets Is Cold
(From G.P. No P.C. Lock Up album; 2018)

Good old man pimpidoo mob music from D Squared & some uncredited breh who sounds vaguely familiar. Moral of the slap? Stick to ya cataplults if you ain't got no aim, lil' hombres. Ideally this one would have dropped on a cassingle with My 501's and For Real (retitled as Tube Socks on Dru's new album.)

*EDIT* Guest is Mistah F.A.B sounding far more contemplative than his usual self.

Thursday, 14 June 2018

Generic list post: 80s non-Rap 101

Robert Tepper dramatically lip-syncing his way through the best song from the Rocky IV OST on some German TV show. Lotta speculation in the YouTube comments about whether Tepper colours his hair or not, but I couldn't care less meself - if he dyes, he dyes ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

It's non-Rap week here on The Martorialist, mainly because ya host has been struck down by a strong dose of blogger's block. Thus, here's a companion to the 80's Rap 101 post generic list post: 101 great non-Rap songs from the decade when Paolo Rossi was never called an arsehole.

Gen X - Dancing With Myself (O.G 7" version) (1980)
Mavis John - Use My Body (1980)
Motorhead - Ace Of Spades (1980)
Roger Troutman - So Ruff So Tuff (1980)
Siouxsie & The Banshees - Happy House (1980)
Diana Ross - Upside Down (1980)
The Cramps - I Was A Teenage Werewolf (1980)
Blondie - Call Me (1980)
The Brat - Leave Me Alone (1980)
Joy Division - Isolation (1980)
Maze ft. Frankie Beverley - Before I Let Go (1981)
Kraftwerk - It's More Fun To Compute (1981)
The Jam - Funeral Pyre (1981)
Human League - Don't You Want Me (1981)
Minor Threat - Straight Edge (1981)
Glory - Let's Get Nice (7" version) (1981)
Hall & Oates - I Can't Go for That (No Can Do) (1981)
The Go-Go's - Our Lips Are Sealed (1981)
The Plugz - El Clavo Y La Cruz (1981)
John Carpenter & Alan Howarth - Chase Across The 69th Street Bridge (1981)
Bad Brains - I (1982)
Fun Boy Three ft. Bananarama - It Ain't What You Do.... (1982)
Vanity 6 - Nasty Girl (1982)
John Sullivan & Ronnie Hazelhurst - Hooky Street (1982)
Michael "Mars Bar" Jackson - Billie Jean (1982)
Negative Approach - Ready To Fight (1982)
ABC - Poison Arrow (1982)
Musical Youth - Pass The Dutchie (1982)
The Freeze - Refrigerator Heaven (1982)
Patrice Rushen - Forget Me Nots (1982)
Deep Wound - Video Prick (1982)
Debarge - I Like It (1982)
FEAR - New York's Alright If You Like Saxophones (1982)
Haircut One Hundred - Ski Club (1982)
Blancmange - Living On The Ceiling (1982)
The Style Council - Long Hot Summer (1983)
ESG - Moody (Spaced Out) (1983)
Bananarama - Cruel Summer (1983)
The RAH Band - Messages From The Stars (1983)
Yes - Owner Of A Lonely Heart (1983)
Rick James - Cold Blooded (1983)
Mary Jane Girls - All Night Long (1983)
Suicidal Tendencies - Institutionalized (1983)
New Order - Blue Monday (1983)
Billy Joel - Careless Talk (1983)
Rufus & Chaka Khan - Ain't Nobody (1983)
Yellowman - Zungguzungguguzungguzeng (1983)
Prince & The Revolution - The Beautiful Ones (1984)
Nu Shooz - I Can't Wait (1984)
Black Flag - Slip It In (1984)
Bronski Beat - Smalltown Boy (1984)
New Edition - Mr. Telephone Man (1984)
Philip Bailey & Phil Collins - Easy Lover (1984)
Hüsker Dü - Never Talking To You Again (1984)
Wham - Careless Whisper (1984)
Tears For Fears - Shout (1984)
Dennis Edwards ft. Siedah Garrett - Don't Look Any Further (1984)
Harold Faltermeyer - Axel F (1984)
Duran Duran - Wild Boys (1984)
Madonna - Into The Groove (1985)
Brad Fiedel - Dream Window (1985)
Simply Red - Holding Back The Years (1985)
Cherelle ft. Alexander O'Neal - Saturday Love (1985)
Robert Tepper - No Easy Way Out (1985)
Model 500 - Night Drive (Thru-Babylon) (1985)
Yello - Oh Yeah (1985)
Dead Or Alive - You Spin Me Round (Like a Record) (1985)
Art Of Noise - Moments In Love (7" version) (1985)
Anita Baker - Sweet Love (1986)
Bl'ast! - Nightmare (1986)
Virgo - My Space (1986)
Mr. Fingers - Can You Feel It? (1986)
Sleezy D - I've Lost Control (Space Side) (1986)
Adonis - No Way Back (1986)
Half Man Half Biscuit - Trumpton Riots (1986)
Dag Nasty - Circles (1986)
Janet Jackson - What Have You Done For Me Lately (1986)
Talk Talk - Life's What You Make It (1986)
Cro Mags - Hard Times (1986)
Peter Gabriel - Big Time (1986)
Cameo - Candy (1986)
Guns N' Roses - It's So Easy (1987)
Frankie Knuckles ft. Jamie Principle - Baby Wants To Ride (1987)
Phuture - Your Only Friend (1987)
Tim Capello - I Still Believe (1987)
Terence Trent D'Arby - Sign Your Name (1987)
INXS - Need You Tonight (1987)
Coldcut - Beats + Pieces (1987)
Sade - Turn My Back On You (1988)
Danzig - Mother (1988)
Bobby Brown - My Perogative (1988)
Guy - Teddy's Jam (1988)
Al B. Sure! - Night And Day (1988)
Infest - Fetch The Pliers (1988)
808 State - Pacific (1989)
Depeche Mode - Personal Jesus (1989)
The Reynolds Girls - I'd Rather Jack (1989)
Faith No More - Edge Of The World (1989)
Tamsin West - Round The Twist (Theme) (1989)
Soul II Soul - Back to Life (However Do You Want Me) (1989)
Nirvana - School (1989)

***EDIT* Thanx to Noah for turning this into a YouTube playlist.

Tuesday, 12 June 2018

"And now for something completely different..."

One of ya host's favourite new-to-me discoveries of the past couple of years, found when reading an interview with Repo Man director/former Moviedrome host/greatest living Scouser Alex Cox: the 1980 EP by the L.A Chicano Punk band The Brat. Bird up front on vocals, teenage angst on deck, and a strong ear for a tune so comparisons with X are inevitable, but The Brat were rawer, which always helps Punk music age better dunnit.

Related trivia: when Alex Cox first met Harry Dean Stanton's agent he tried to get Cox to consider another one of his clients for the role of Bud in Repo Man instead of Stanton.

All seemed to be going properly and professionally, so I paid a courtesy visit to Harry's agent at the most famous Hollywood agency. This was an eye opener. I spent 20 minutes chatting to the agent about what a great actor Harry was, and the wonderful work he'd done. The agent listened and then said, ‘Harry Dean's okay, but he's past it. You need someone younger, more up-and-coming. I also represent Mick Jagger. Why don't you offer Mick the part?’

This gobsmacked me. First, Jagger was completely wrong for the role of a grizzled, burned-out L.A repo man. And second, the agent was out of line. We'd offered Harry the part, and here his agent was trying to do him out of the job. It was immoral, surely a breach of contract, and stupid. I replied that Harry's age, experience, and nationality made him the best choice, made my excuses and left.

Thursday, 7 June 2018

Flid Marti

Kid Capri - Intro
(From 10/09/89 mixtape; 1989)

Doesn't matter whether your leisurewear is Prada or Primark, this is still pure goosebumps under yer sweatsuit vibes innit? Kid Capri's blend of Stephanie Mills' Something In The Way You Make Feel acapella over the Impeach The President drum-break was Rap & Bullshit before Ron G or Uptown Records. Dome blown within the comforts of my own home that it was also Hype Williams' inspiration for using the acapella of Soul II Soul's Back To Life to soundtrack Belly's opening scene:

Monday, 4 June 2018

"Your shit is underground, my shit is underwater" 2k18

"Let's keep it trill, bitch, I'm in that water like a Navy seal
On them percocets, got me roarin' like a damn wheel
Her skillz give me thrillz, suck my ballz and give me chillz
Bitch, I'm starvin', I need a meal, I got my tool with my drill"

WNC Ram Bam - G Warfare
(From Rehabilitation mixtape: 2018)

In that water like LL Cool J in Deep Blue Sea, even the WNC 2nd-stringers like Ram Bam are comin' with that fire H20 right now.

Related: smfh @ Alamo Records for listing all of 70th Street Carlos music on Amazon/Spotify etc as 70thstcarlos.

Saturday, 2 June 2018

R.I.P Channel U/AKA

"It looks like it's just me n da girls
Because all the mandem are doin' sumfin' else"

Gemini - Me N Da Girls
(From Channel U; 2007 or 2008)

We'll always have Gemini's Me N Da Girls even if 90% of the other songs played on Channel U were only notable for their struggle comedy value. We can try but we'll never forget Bearman, Mr. Wong, Jelluzz, and Tulisa's coke dealer m8 Mike GLC.

AKA was mah spot, though. Where else on national British telly could you catch videos by Donae'o, Giggs, Kwamz & Flava, J Hus, Young T & Bugsey, and Maleek Berry next to videos by YG, Spice, Tinashe, Rich Homie Quan, Busy Signal, and Tay-K, followed by a Best of Snoop video hour? Ya host's bouts of summer insomnia are gonna be precisely 95% more boring from hereon in unless KerrangTV do regular Danzig specials or NOW 80s start showing Fun Boy Three videographies.

Get Elton John in to perform Candle N Da Wind for Freeview channel number 373 innit. Above the clouds with .TV, Bravo and that quiz station Suzanne Cowie used to present on.

Friday, 1 June 2018

The P in P.S.K stands for Pussy

"Nowadays n*ggas mad because you ain't they bitch
Beat this pussy on him, shorty instantly pussy whipped
Left his ass blue by the balls, he a Crip
Tongue in my shit, by the mouth he a ship"

Queen Key ft. Dreezy - Ha
(From Eat My Pussy EP; 2018)

Finally the fairer sex have their own P.S.K. Thought Valee & Chase The Money's Acid was the final frontier of Chicago sub-bass, but evidently not.