Wednesday, 19 December 2012

Who'll be the next Nu-Metal nonces?

With news breaking that Lostprophets frontman Ian Watkins is on some Andre Williams type shit, will Papa Roach's Last Resort video with its smorgasbord of underage girls sulking in the bedroom of some surburan bungalow end up as the Nu-Metal equivalent of that old clip of Clunk Click where Jimmy Savile and Gary Glitter ominously drape their arms around/drool over a bunch of teenage girls from Broadmoor who'd later go on to press sexual assault charges against them? (no Das Racist)

Think about it, yo: not only is the Last Resort video little more than nonce masturbation fodder masquerading as a music video by a second tier Nu-Metal band, but Papa Roach and Lostprophets even share the same career trajectories - tubby whiggas in XXXL jeans with Go Racer stripes down the side who were forced to lose weight, smear on the Mascara and start dressing like a Costco budget version of Velvet Revolver by their record label once the Nu-Metal ship started sinking.

It's all fun and games when you guys speculate about Fieldy from KORN hanging out in the parking lots of junior high schools, or try to remember which Nu-Metal band that cunt with the stupid beard + hair who pretended to play guitar on that X-Ecutioners song with Mike Shinoda was in, but if it transpires that Wes Borland buggered Tony Hawk's son during the Break Stuff video shoot then the best Rock song of the last thirty years is dead to me.


James said...

LOL @ this post.

Not so LOL @ this.

Kelvin Mack10zie said...

Bloody 'ell!

In related news, do u wear the mark of Cain?

bradley said...

can't believe this story didn't make the front pages of any red tops

what a dirty cunt

Fosterakahunter said...