Monday, 9 September 2013

Generic list post : RiFF RaFF should piss off back to TV already edition

"Y'know what RiFF RaFF - I see you out here doin' your thing with your plan and that's cool; you a funny guy and all that, but I'ma step, aiight?"


Hollllllld up wait a minute Calvin - stay right there, B, because It's RiFF RaFF who needs to step. Word around town, if you enjoy any music RiFF RaFF has released this year then you're a modern day equivalent of Tha Pumpsta and you were probably heartbroken at the recent spat between those noted racists Jim Goad & Brendan Soderberg. Here's why he no longer serves any sort of purpose as a recording Rap artiste in 2013 :

1. His Iced Out My Lighthouse mixtape with TKO Capone ain't never happenin' now he's a Diplo doja, and, consequently, he hasn't made solo shit dope since Time and Lil' Mama I'm Sorry.

2. His initial appeal was that you never knew what he was gonna say on a song and he'd occasionally come with some A grade crazy-space-shit-that-don't-even-make-no-sense like that time he said he was "playin' pool with the planets". Alas, it couldn't last and nowadays his rhymes are little more than a predictable smorgasbord of his own memes.

3. He's already wasted a bunch of beats by Dame Grease and Harry Fraud which would've been much better served as a Coke Boys spin-off project for Chinx Drugz & French Montana, and he's only going to continue to waste other people's beats in future.

4. It's probably too late for him to convince his buddies Lil' Debbie and Kreayshawn to shoot a dyke-out sex tape now the latter is about to pop out a kid, and NOBODY wants to watch a Lil' Debbie and RiFF RaFF sex tape.

5. There's a new cracka Rapper just pulled up in town by the name of Chazmaniia who's already had a Slay The Father moment on record by bodying Lil' Reese, and who surely has a more interesting backstory than Minnesota whigga who moved to Houston and funded his Rap career by pretending to be a graphic designer on MySpace and then ripping his clients off.

20 comments:

doe doe an a skunk said...

You might have a goat Paid In Full reference there b

approve this message

step one said...

I've never heard anything by RiffRaff. Everything I know about him is based on this:

http://phatfriend.com/2013/06/12/i-hooked-up-with-riff-raff-part-1/

Also, Fuck a Diplo.

Fredo Fantano said...

His songs with TKO Capone were the post-modern Swag-Rap Chamillionaire & Paul Wall, which is was very good thing to be.

His solo songs other than Larry Bird, Time and Lil' Mama I'm Sorry are basically novelty records which were only funny within the context of their videos.

His time is up.

noz said...

pharoahe played pool with the planets first anyway http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gHj79PDtEmY&t=50s

Anonymous said...

to add onto step one's link (NSFW):
http://thedirty.com/2013/08/exclusive-riff-raff-jodyhighroller-masturbated-right-infront-of-me-warning-nude-images/

not even TV deserves this guy TBH. GTFOutta SOCIETY YIFF YAFF!

Fredo Fantano said...

Good lord, Anonymous.

Good call, Noz.

done said...

Knew that sounded familiar.

Fredo Fantano said...

This is where RiFF RaFF used the line : I Dont Vibe Like Dat Remix by Steven Jo ft. RiFF RaFF & Waka Flocka Flame.

Amor de Rey said...

I understand the RiFF/ TKO combo but I always wanted him to do a project with the kid that made, "Suck My D*ck With A Mothaf**kin Condom" as I think it would've been more creative than the Swishahouse karaoke w/ Capone.

Anonymous said...

I'm officially fascinated by Chazmaniia.

Fredo Fantano said...

My theory/hope is that Chazmaniia is the grandson of some Chicago mafia don. Every city needs its very own Genovese-type white rapper.

2SHIN said...

tbh i'd probably wank to a lil' debbie riff raff sex tape.

i don't know if chazmaniia actually said "bitch" w/ the jesse pinkman inflection or if im projecting but he's already my second favourite whyte person to ever exist. white cte is obviously number 1.

Fredo Fantano said...

White had the decency to practically disappear after dropping Code Name and Taking Pictures to ensure his legacy would forever remain intact.

Pay attention, RiFF RaFF.

David said...

I definitely made the same Jesse Pinkman "Bitch" connection, key moment of that verse tbh

H.L. said...

You're in rare form here MF.

done said...

Think I was put on to Riff Raff by 2Shin under a White appreciation post. The future looked so rosy mang, now theres just these cunts with "mac" in their name and Lil Debbies getting all the vlad tv interviews. :(

Fredo Fantano said...

Yep, 2$hin posting the I.C.U video in my White post back in 2010 was when I first heard him rap too.

2SHIN said...

If you completely disregard the 548684123 songs he dropped in between, I feel like riff raff had an amazing run with: time > bird on a wire > break away

which is like 1 banger more than gunplay has....

Fredo Fantano said...

OH NO YOU DIDN'T!

Bird On A Wire should've been a Chinx Drugz & French Montana song.

2SHIN said...

nar i actually really like gunplay, i just wanted to say some foul shit.

dunno man that would ruin the whole "whyte ppl only" vibe of the original.

Sponsors