Loonie Gee

My favourite discovery of 2014 so far. An associate described the song as "total Martorialist aesthetic", which may or may not have been meant as a compliment, but it's true: This Ain't Funny is what a Slick Rick single for early '00s Bad Boy would have sounded like and/or what Ma$e's Welcome Back should have sounded like.

But that does Loon a disservice because he kills this ("if Loon dies, wolves come out like moon rise/and make n*ggas hard to find like Mumbai"), demonstrates why having stooges like Shyne and goons like Anthony "Wolf" Jones on the Bad Boy payroll was paramount ("the code of the street is to hold ya own/if you're smart then you never got to hold no chrome"), and he deserves one great song to his name after being a part of two bona fide classic singles in Cali Chronic and I Need A Girl Part 2.

Loon - This Ain't Funny
(From Loon album; 2003)


This Ain't Funny is that one great song, and it should have been the third single from Loon's album with a video set in Spanish Harlem full of tracking shots of Puffy playing air-flamenco guitar while standing up in a moving drop-top 1930 Rolls Royce Phantom II that's chauffeured by Fonzworth Bentley. As for Loon, he'd be doing the invisible rope-pull dance down 106th Street with the chick who looked like Brandy from the Feel So Good video.