Friday 30 July 2010

I don't mean to be rude, but The Fat Boys ate up the food!

Sit down and relax
turn off your Beta Max
and let me tell you how the Fat Boys ate up the food
they came with their refridgerator and broke into my house
ate everything out the cabinets, even took the cheese from the mouse
so send me some money 'cause I am hungry
now I don't mean to be rude
but The Fat Boys ate up my food
HELP!


J.D.L of Coldcrush Brothers - The Fat Boys Ate Up The Food



They laid everything on the table, then they grabbed their knife and fork
then then dug in with a smile & grin, and said "L, pass the salt"
they grilled all the steaks
devoured sixteen cakes
then after that they had the nerve to dog my saucer plate
somebody send me some money 'cause I am hungry
now I don't mean to be rude
but The Fat Boys ate up my food


Long-forgotten amswer/dis record to The Fat Boys by J.D.L of The Coldcrush Brothers and produced by O.C Rodriguez Jr. AKA Master O.C of The Fearless Four. If any one song typifies the resentment the original Bronx rappers had towards the second and third wave of non-Bronx rappers who came out in '83 and '84, it'd probably be this.

This is also a great example of the terrible business and creative decisions that Coldcrush made as recording artists, as it's J.D.L making an answer song to The Fat Boys in 1986 when The Fat Boys's popularity had begun to wane due to the ubiquity of the Def Jam power-houses that were LL and the Beasties, and the appearance of singles from a new breed of rappers like Ultramagnetic MC's, Eric B. & Rakim, B.D.P, and Kool G. Rap & DJ Polo. Not quite a bad decision of Royce blowing up the spot about ghostwriting for Dre on the verge of signing to Aftermath calibre, but still not a particularly good move for J.D.L to make, eh? At least you've got always got Fresh, Wild, Fly, And Bold as your one classic record* where the stars aligned for you, Coldcrush members.

It kinda bangs, though, and I really wouldn't say no to a copy of it. Not for the £30 the one copy on Discogs is currently going for, mind. £12 and £3.50 p+p tops.

* I don't consider the equally great Feel The Horns a real Coldcrush song since Grandmaster Caz isn't on it.

4 comments:

g@grandgood.com said...

Implying that the economic predicament of the Cold Crush Brothers (as recording artists) is primarily a result of their "terrible" decisions is a mistake. The opposite is also not true, the economic empowerment seen in the 80s/90s was not always the result of the business acumen of teenage rappers and producers. Believe that.

Kelvin Mack10zie said...

Yeah, I know they were young and were victims of Tuff City's incomptentence as a label, but you don't think the pound-for-pound best live rap group as evidenced on the old tapes and in Wild Style should have a better discography to their name?

Heartbreakers is alright, but Punk Rock Rap in 1983, a year after the likes of The Message, Message II (Survival), Scorpio, Rockin' It, and Planet Rock?

Boothe said...

I never understood the Royce problem. What exactly did he do to piss Dre off? Reveal that he wrote some of the tracks?

I thought it was widely known and accepted that Dre employs writers.

Kelvin Mack10zie said...

I think it was more of a rumour/worst kept secret back in the 90s before Royce blew Dre's spot and verified it.