Saturday, 7 February 2015

Top 5 things learned at Westwood's party last night


1. It's no coincidence that you can't spell UKHipHop without UKIP, but Westwood's parties are single handedly solving racial tensions in this country.

2. Trap Queen is the biggest club record here right now, Hot N*gga refuses to go away, CoCo is thankfully on its way out, Westwood's cut & paste of Whatcha Say/Truffle Butter is the definitive version of the song.

3. Westwood grabbing the mic during Try Me and imploring the ethnic ladies in attendance to "try me if you want a white guy tonight" bodies the entire history of stand-up comedy.

4. Where lesser DJ's would invite a handful of white lasses onstage to awkwardly twerk for the crowd, Westwood is a true showman who employs his own troupe of PoC twerk-gymnasts the L30 Dancers to dry hump lads plucked from the crowd.

5. That rumour about some bin-dippers nicking the rims off Westwood's jeep that time are true. Consequently, he gets the train up to Liverpool nowadays.

12 comments:

Jordy said...

Hope he travels first class.

Kate SmurfHate said...

How long until Operation Yewtree wants to have a word with Timothy?

Roget Seesaw said...

Yeah he takes the train. Then when he gets back to Euston he gets a taxi to another taxi rank and then gets a taxi back to his flat.

Anonymous said...

Westwood ballin' in Tesco.

Si Mane Price said...

Also had an epiphany and realised the Only beat is a complete rip off of Shitro's Justin Bieber.

Anonymous said...

Timmy's such a big dawg he lives in social housing. http://www.theguardian.com/music/2004/oct/03/popandrock

yeldarb said...

It's no coincidence that you can't spell UKHipHop without UKIP

HAHA

Fulci said...

LOL https://vine.co/v/OFg0BWMdtie

Si Mane Price said...

From Stackin' Season to Stockin' Season.

Fulci said...

Cheers.

http://38.media.tumblr.com/f6735bbcf2eeb492ede725ca47430c04/tumblr_nji3w3bgI31u46w66o1_250.gif

Si Mane Price said...

Greatest GIF od 2015.

nyquil said...

Westwood is one of my heroes. Seriously

Sponsors