Thursday, 4 June 2009

Martorial elegance # 22

There are those who theorise that Hell isn't an actual place but, rather, a concept of eternal punishment where sinners are reincarnated smack-dab into various personal nightmare scenarios time and time again. There was, for example, the Judgement Night episode of The Twlight Zone where the kraut U-Boat commander who ruthlessly torpeodoed a lost ship full of innocent civillains suddendly finds himself as one of the innocent civillians on the lost ship, but here at The Martorialist we can think of few worse fates than having to live through being reincarnated as a staggeringly fat dood's cycle shorts over and over and over again until the universe gently implodes one morning trillions of years into the future when Bob from Rotherham accidently forgets to turn off his immersion heater one night.



You can keep having your pre-marital sex with naive students who are easily impressed by your tall tales of being a real dj and easily seduced by bottles of WKD, and you can stay indulding in those lust fuelled self-pleasure sessions over various female cast members of Doctors (Melody > Megan Fox) if you want but, be warned, your future may involve an awful lot of clammy arse and grundle blubber.

Monster Magnet - Sin's A Good Man's Brother



Curtis Mayfield - (Don't Worry) If There's A Hell Below We're All Gonna Go

3 comments:

Boothe (All Things) said...

Hahaha

You know what? I can't even hate on that dude. At least he's on his bike trying to do something about his ponderosity, as opposed to walking the streets with a bag of chips in one hand, and a slurpee in the other.

MF said...

A valid point.

Affirmative action in '09.

James said...

that twlight zone episode is ace

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