Generic list post: January 2019

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when the VladTV wardrobe department must have had a clothing shortage.

The Bizzie Boys - Brainstorm (1988/2011)
Cam'Ron ft. Ted Dibiase & Frank Muller - Oh Boy (Remix) (2002)
Pablo Skywalkin - No Big Homie (2017)
Eat Em & Spitta - Side N*gga (2018)
DaBaby - Walker Texas Ranger (2019)
AZ - It's Time (2019)
Other notables: listened to that 70th Street Carlos & Sauce Walka teaser snippet more than any of the songs Carlos dropped this past month; Z-Ro pleasantly surprised me with the best single I've heard from him in a few years; Queen Key and Quelle Chris both disappointed me with their new songs; checked Sada Baby's Bartier Bounty album and this was my conclusion; spent a good portion of January revisiting old Rap from 1989, 1999, and 2009.

Late pass!

Pablo Skywalkin - No Big Homie
(From YouTube; 2017)


2010's Detroit street Rap: a scene where Newcleus are more influential than Nas. Prefer this 2017 Pablo Skywalkin single to Cash Kidd's 2018 Jam On It interpolation, meself. Aside from a Zorbas here, a Planet Of The Apes there, or a LLYGMISTA everywhere, this current wave of Detroit street Rap still makes the most sense to my ears when it goes jackin' for beats from decades past/parts elsewhere.

All of which is a convoluted way of saying I ain't feelin' the production on Sada Baby's Bartier Bounty album apart from a couple of last year's singles. Can't fault a city for having its own default sound, but I can fault the default sound for being merely functional rather than function music.

Styles By The 'Gram Part Whateva Man

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A post shared by Rich Porter (@imrichporter) on Jan 15, 2019 at 1:11pm PST

Sounds like Carlos' best song since Wake Me Up, right? I don't even like Sauce Walka usually but this is on my most anticipated songs of early 2019 list alongside this Rich Blue shit and that Eat Em shit.

If Feds is listenin'...

"I show you how to weigh your work on the way to work
I be proud of you like, dog, that's the way to work"

Cam'Ron ft. Ted Dibiase & Frank Muller - Oh Boy (Remix)
(From Westwood's BBC Rap show; 2002)


Peep what Step "Plug" One found on a tape of a 2002 Westwood show: a remix of Oh Boy featuring a new Cam'Ron verse and 2 verses by some Philly duo called Ted Dibiase & Frank Muller who went by the name of The Feds/Fedz (nope, us neither.) Step asked Just Blaze if it's official or nah, and he reckons it must be some "fake DJ trickery" because he'd never heard it before, so who knows? Whatever the case may be, it's a Cam verse I've never heard elsewhere, and Step's right about it being a way better flip than the Oh Girl remix with those annoying half-arsed "GIIIRRL" vox every 7 seconds.

The Poor Elementz: Wicked22

A new series dedicated to various 4 elementz survivalists polluting t'internet who make Dart Adams seem like one of the DGB guys. For doz who've slept, allow me to introduce Wicked22.

Who dat: quintessential REAL HIP HOP retard who looks like tubby Scott Storch if he were an extra in Dilated Peoples' Worst Comes To Worst video. Wicked22 is known for bragging he has a mammoth 'vinyls' collection, yet appears to have no more than 500 records maximum in the myriad of pictures he carpet bombs the internet with.

Greatest quotes: "For all you br0s asking if Black Jeff and Asian Jeff are my only ethnic friends, here's a spreadsheet which breaks down the races of the 37 people I count as actual close friends. These are the people who I would wish a happy birthday to and people who I'd help out if they needed my help. Those 37 friends are people who I pretty regularly keep in touch with, 12-15 of which I semi-regularly see and hangout with."

Key beefs: "gAY ass mainstream rap"; "fAGGIT ass nerd rap"; "gAY ass drumless rap"; "fAGGIT ass MP3s"; former UGHH.com CEO Adam "Quest" Walder.

Notable opinionz: doesn't so much have opinions as a handful of stockphrases he's been repeating ad nauseam for the last 15 years. Where A.C The Program Director's parochial backwardness can be explained by the head injury he suffered in the 90's, Wicked's myopic palilalia is the sewage pipe through which his Asperger's flows.

Other eccentricities: wearing t-shirts over sweatshirts; creepy fetish for AZN women; big craft beer enthusiast.

Born To Audiomack: 2010's Golden Oldies (Re-Up)

Remember my playlist of legit jams from decades past which were officially unreleased until they finally saw the proper light of day during the 2010's? Shit's just been updated with a funky little 1988 Bizzie Boyz song which flew under my radar when it dropped in 2011 (The Bizzie Boyz being Ski Beatz's first Rap group from North Carolina, mainly known for Droppin' It which appeared on Ego Trip's The Big Playback compilation.) Shout out to BudBundy1978 and DaBaby, North Carolina is in this bitch.

Tracks & Deets:
The Bizzie Boyz - Brainstorm (1988/2011)
Lord Finesse - Inconsiderate Females (1989/2012)
Spice 1 - Killa Days (1992/2014)
Camp Lo - Camp Lo (Bust Ya Down) (1995/2016)
G. Dep - Blak N*gga (1996/2016)
Mac Dre - Pawns In The Game (1997/2014)
Juvenile ft. Big Tymers - Cash Money Gorilla (1998/2017)
Sean Price - I Shot Tha (2005/2014)
Max B - Take A Flick (2007/2013)
The Jacka ft. Dru Down - For Real (2009/2015)
MF DOOM & Madlib - Avalanche (2009/2016)
T-Pain & Lil' Wayne - Listen To Me (2009/2017)


Cheers to BigSleep for Zippyshare hook up.

Generic list post: 2009 was 10 years ago!

Tom "Da Head Banger" Breihan in action!

The finale of this cheap nostalgia-fest. 30 Legit Jams™ from the year of the Gucci Mane blog post comment section wars. Bit of an anticlimax after the 1989 and 1999 lists, but a not half bad if you're willing to accept that 80% of everything good in 2009 was now on the internet or from some obscure independent album.

DOOM - Gazzillion Ear
Lil B - Like A Martian
DJ Quik & Kurupt - 9x's Outta 10
Max B - Where Do I Go?
French Montana & Max B - Stake Sause
Curren$y - Scared Of Monsters
Gucci Mane - Lemonade
Waka Flocka Flame - Hard In The Paint
ELZhi - Deep
The Jacka ft. Cellski - Won't Be Right
Rich Boy - Drop
Lil' Boosie - Mind Of A Maniac
D-Lo - No Hoe
AZ ft. DJ Greg Mack - Live Your Life
YG - She A Model
Cali Swag District - Teach Me How To Dougie
Raekwon & Ghostface Killah ft. Method Man - New Wu
Eddi Projex - On Sight
Fast Life Yungstaz - Prada Walkin'
Tha Dogg Pound ft. Turf Talk - Y'All Know What I'm Doing
Young Dro - Clean Wit' It
UGK - Da Game Been Good To Me
Jay Electronica - Exhibit C
Treal Lee & Prince Rick ft. Wideframe - Mr. Hit Dat Hoe
Nicki Minaj - Itty Bitty Piggy
Grand Puba ft. Q-Tip - Good To Go
Jackie Chain - Diamonds & Cadillacs
G-Side & G-Mane - No One Does It Betta
A-Wax & Gonzoe ft. C-Murder - Natural Disasterz
Witchdoctor - Rich & Poor
Honourable mention of sorts goes to T-Pain & Lil' Wayne's Listen To Me: supposed to drop in 2009 but didn't see the light of day until 2017. G.O.A.T use of the Oompa Loompa song or wot?

Generic list post: 1999 was 20 years ago!

You knew this was comin' after the recent favourite Rap songs of 1989 list, right? 30 Legit Jams™ from the year when da machinez didn't all implode at the stroke of midnight on december 31st.

MF DOOM ft. DJ Cucumber Slice - Rhymes Like Dimes
UGK - Wood Wheel
Black Rob - Whoa
Mystikal & OutKast - Neck Uv Da Woods
Ghostface Killah ft Raekwon - Apollo Kids
Method Man & Redman - Y.O.U
Ol' Dirty Bastard ft. Kelis - Got Your Money
Juvenile - U Understand
Lil' Wayne ft. Juvenile & B.G. - Tha Block Is Hot
Gang Starr - Full Clip
Screwball - F.A.Y.B.A.N
Young Bleed - I Couldn't C' It
Lay-Lo - Take It Like A Gee
Pharoahe Monch - Simon Says
Dr. Dre ft. Snoop Dogg, Kurupt & Nate Dogg - The Next Episode
Eminem ft. Dr. Dre - Guilty Conscience
Akinyele - Messin' With My Cru
Q-Tip - Let's Ride
Mista Madd ft. Slim Thug & Yungstar - Down South
Dead Prez - Hip Hop
Trina - Da Baddest Bitch
The Beatnuts ft. Willie Stubbz & Swinger - Muchachacha
Missin' Linx - What It Is
Project Pat ft. Gangsta Boo - Ballers
Craig Mack - Please Listen To My Demo
Harlem World - Cali Chronic
Slick Rick - I Own America (Part 1)
Will Smith & DJ Jazzy Jeff ft. Biz Markie & Slick Rick - So Fresh
Nelly - County Grammar (Hot Shit)
Fatman Scoop & Crooklyn Clan - Be Faithful
There's at least 4 songs here which have been rinsed to near-ruination by bait DJs, but they're still such 5 star general choonz that I can't bring meself to snub 'em: Simon Says, The Next Episode, Hip Hop, and Be Faithful. Pains me somewhat to snub Mobb Deep, Mac Dre, B.G., 8Ball & MJG, and Nas but none of 'em released a song in 1999 that I like as much as anything in this list.

'99 is also notable for being the year when the absolute worst Rap song of all time dropped. What's more horrific: the sight of 2 birds drinking scat in 2 Girls, 1 Cup, or the sound of Mos Def doing his dibba-dibba-dinosaur scat-singing on Umi Says? (FYI, I never watched 2 Girls, 1 Cup meself. I did, however, watch the Bun B reaction video.)

The Low End Query

Turns out Queen Key's Ha wasn't the final frontier of Chicago sub-bass, that'd be her new single Ratchett. Alas, that isn't a compliment this time around because the low-end on Ratchett sounds like it was mixed & mastered by the ghost of Helen Keller. True story: if you slap Ratchett through a proper pair of speakers you'll suffer the same fate as Lost Boy Dwayne.

Who'd a thunk there'd be such a thing as too much bass?

Treal Lee T.V

It's 2019, do you know what that mean? It's now a decade since the YouTube video of Treal Lee & Prince Rick dancing to Get Off Me Now with Mr. Hit Dat Hoe in their Dallas neighbourhood was uploaded. Word around town, this video is so HIP HOP that it cured Kool Herc's kidney stones - well, that's what Herc told his sister after all the donations from the PayPal account she set up mysteriously disappeared and his kidney stones miraculously cleared up overnight. Not tryna suggest that Kool Herc is a dishonest motherfucker, but when he played Liverpool back in 2000 he pretended to be doing the beat-juggling on Fusion Beats Vol. 2 himself.

Treal Lee & Prince Rick ft. Wideframe - Mr. Hit Dat Hoe
(From YouTube; 2009)


Anyhoo, it's a bit unfair that Treal Lee & Prince Rick are only remembered for Throwed Off (Fuck Everybody) innit? Here at The Martorialist we've gotta lorra lorra love for their ode to Mr. Hit That Hoe, Shoes Up, and Transform. Treal Lee & Prince Rick actually had a nice little run of songs between 2009 - 2012, but it's probably not a coincidence that they fell off after they switched from Levi's to True Religion - you can't be Dallas cowboys if you've got some homme Eurotrash jeans hanging off your arses, lads.

Making Moves With Troup

Always thought the grainy black & white Fresh Records press releases were the only photographic evidence of late '80's Craig Mack in his O.G Rap incarnation as MC EZ, so colour me surprised to find some multi-shade flava for ya eye. Yung Mack wearing what look like Troop high-tops circa the MC EZ & Troup era:

Bonus beats: Mack's Please Listen To My Demo remake has so much more pathos than the EPMD original. Erick & Parrish kept it philosophical like the Greek man Plato, but Mack made it spiritual/educational like the German word Bildungsroman.

Craig Mack - Please Listen To My Demo
(From The Wooden Horse 12" single; 1999/The Mack World Sessions album; 2017)

I Got That Work Husband

"And her lil' juvenile 'll set it off behind her
And her sugar daddy buy her nothin' but designer
But her main n*gga, he the real shiner
He the Birdman, he a real Big Tymer"

Eat Em & Spitta - Side N*gga
(From Industreets The Mixtape; 2018)


Nowt firm handshake with this one, more of a behind-your-back anthem by the Baton Rouge rapper who looks like young Tragedy & the Baton Rouge rapper who isn't Curren$y. Not so much Creepin' On Ah Come Up as Creepin' On Ahnother Man's Cum Up.

Generic list post: 1989 was 30 years ago!

1989: the number, another summer, the sound of Funky Drummer & other James Brown breaks becoming less prevalent. 30 Legit Jams™ from the year of ya host's personal favorite James Bond movie.

Public Enemy - Fight The Power
LL Cool J - Big Ole Butt
3rd Bass - Monte Hall
Mac Dre - Young Black Brotha
Ultimate Force - I'm Not Playing
EPMD - Get The Bozack
Stezo - Girl Trouble
Nice & Smooth - Early To Rise
Ice-T - Lethal Weapon
Freddie Foxxx - The Master
Tuff Crew - Behold The Detonator
Beastie Boys - What Comes Around
Kool G. Rap & D.J Polo - Road To The Riches
Big Daddy Kane - Warm It Up Kane
Grandmaster Melle Mel - Free Style
Geto Boys - Gangster Of Love
Ultramagnetic MC's ft. Tim Dog - A Chorus Line
MC Lyte - Cha Cha Cha
Brand Nubian - Brand Nubian
N.W.A - A Bitch Iz A Bitch
The D.O.C - Portrait Of A Master Piece
De La Soul ft. Native Tongues - Buddy
Uptown - Dope On Plastic
Digital Underground - Humpty Dance
Special Ed - I Got It Made
The 45 King - The 900 Number
Lakim Shabazz - Your Arm's Too Short To Box With God
YZ - In Control Of Things
Tone Loc - Wild Thing
Schoolly D - Gangster Boogie
Previously: 1988 was 30 years ago!