Craic Mack

Has a rapper ever suffered a more embarrassing identity crisis than Everlast? The fella went from slangin' pizza pies to drinkin' Guinness pints to singin' like Chris Rea to rebranding himself as Necro & Ill Bill's Uncle Doughie. When his Whitey Ford Sings The Blues album dropped and the videos for What It's Like and Ends were in rotation on MTV I was equally amused and appalled by the sight of him in a cowboy hat strumming an acoustic guitar. The cracka who made Syndication, that's what I called E'. But now he's wearin' a Stetson hat like Paul C. Revisiting What It's Like and Ends decades on minus the videos, I'm gonna have to slang humble pie and hyperbole in the same sentence: both songs are #actually killer choonz which are so obvious prototypes for Bubba Sparxxx's Deliverance. Ends is THE jam 4 me: an ode to lost souls who've been crushed by the 'Murican Dream with a nifty interpolation of a Whodini classic.

Everlast - Ends
(From Whitey Ford Sings The Blues album; 1998)

Everlast · Ends

Another thing Whitey Ford Sings The Blues shares with Bubba's Deliverance is that it features a bonus track which is so good, it should have been the album's street single. Deliverance has Disappear, Whitey Ford Sings The Blues has Next Man. Like Ends, it's another song which is an ode to lost souls who've been crushed by the 'Murican Dream, but instead of sounding like some proto-Deliverance shit, it's delivered in the style of Sporty Thievz. No lie, this shit sounds like it coulda/shoulda had a fish-eye lens Hype Williams video.

Everlast - Next Man
(From Whitey Ford Sings The Blues album; 1998)

Everlast · Next Man (Bonus Track)

Generic list post: August 2026

Holottacheese ft. Holottamula - BFF4L
(From BFF4L single; 2026)

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when we Rap music got its equivalent of the Shit Sisters from Sleepaway Camp II.

Ball Jones ft. Ice Smiles - Krushin' (remix) (2004)
Mic Terror - Step On (2023)
Mic Terror ft. Easy O'Hare - Rent Money (video) (2026)
Gzus Piece - Get Ya Roll On (2026)
Gzus Piece ft. Mic Terror - Shyt (2026)
Mitchy Slick - The Burbs (2026)
Yung Till - 209 Baby (2026)
Surf7 - Goose Coat (2026)
The Cramps - Weekend On Mars (1977 version) (1977/2026)

Bonus bloggin: 1nce again I'm gonna use my monthly wrap-up post to keep track of the best movies and TV shows I've been watching. * indicates rewatches dunnit.

Movies I watched and liked:
The Day The Earth Caught Fire (1961)
Trading Places (1983) *
Clue (1985) *

TV shows I watched and liked:
Ludwig (series 2 new episodes) (2026)
Mastermind (new episodes) (2026)
Only Connect (new episodes) (2026)
The Genius vs. Hulk Hogan (1989)
Rick Rude vs. Sting (1991)
Arsenal vs. Manchester City (2026)
Arsenal vs. Coventry (2026)
Aston Villa vs. Arsenal (2026)
Match Of The Day 1 and 2 (new episodes) (2026)

Other notables: parlour game lists by me in the form of my favourite Rap songs beginning with each letter of the alphabet and my favourite Rap songs beginning with numbers. Also Party Sparty on his 10 favourite films featuring Brits abroad.

MC Ez

There's snippets of a new Ezale song for me to obsess over like it's 2016 again. One of the many things I like about Ezale's videos is that they always feature his same homies who were all up in the 5 Minutes Of Funktown and Foreal Foreal videos back in 2013/2014. We're all on this journey together like a Jumanji flick.

We should probably talk about P-Lo's new song with Clyde Carson, IamSu and Ezale. The beat-switches annoyed me initially, and I'm gonna attribute them to the influence of That Canadian Nonce™. But the song is growing on me like human microbiota.

P-Lo ft. Clyde Carson, IamSu & Ezale - Bay Boyz 4Ever
(From Out The Box album; 2026)

P-Lo · BAY BOYZ 4EVER (feat. Clyde Carson, Iamsu! & Ezale)

What happened to Piece? (Part 2)

"You can find me on your side of town, ridin' with a 30 on the front seat
Windows down bumpin' Juve or some Pimp C
He's just a stand up n***a 'til he's 6 feet"

Gzus Piece ft. Mic Terror - Shyt
(From Gzus Saves album; 2026)

Get Ya Roll On is my jam right there from Gzus Piece's first new album, and Shyt is my joint right here from Gzus Piece's second new album. Gzus & Mic Terror on the same track is invariably Martorialist catnip, and the song is a good example of how Gzus & Mic's music is a stew of different influences: the beat sounds like it's straight outta Queensbridge, while the chorus features shout outs to Juvenile and Pimp C. Forget No Ceilings, Rap music should have No Walls.

Ice Burb Slim

Mitchy Slick - The Burbs
(From The Burbs single; 2026)

Best depiction of American suburbia since Joe Dante or wot? Wholesome adult orientated Gangsta-Rap you could play for your dad or use to soundtrack your Sunday morning gardening. You might be deep in the game, but you got the rules missin' using your strimmer on the sabbath before 11 AM, bruv. Here at The Martorialist we're gonna add this song to our current playlist next to Me N The Boyz by Kurupt & DJ Battlecat.

What happened to Piece?

"Feel this shit up in your chest just like a Mossberg
This shit'll blow you away and leave yo' heart stirred
These the last days, how could you not purge?
Ima get mine, make sure you got yours"

Gzus Piece - Get Ya Roll On
(From 3 For Da Dub album; 2026)

We've had some new Mic Terror, so here's some new Gzus Piece from the first of his two new albums. An understated jam which has been creepin' on ah come up in my rotation. A different type of Chicago "drive slow, homie"-core to Mic's OJ Simpson, but the overall effect is the same: Rap music to take a quiet, leisurely cruise around your neighbourhood to.

Step Up Late

Mic Terror ft. Easy O'Hare - Rent Money
(From The Terror Files album; 2026)

Video for one of my favourite songs from the Mic Terror album. Good timing too because I recently found another Mic loosie single from a few years ago that I missed when it first dropped. Call me Gab Gotcha the way I bless the M.I.C.

Mic Terror - Step On
(From Step On single; 2023)

Numbers On The Board

What's today's mathematics, God... literally. Me and the boiz have already tackled favourite Rap songs beginning with the letters of the alphabet, so how's about we talk favourite Rap songs which begin with numbers? It's rules, guidelines and codes we obey: the song must begin with a number and if you mention a Drake song I will track you down and set Jack Russell terriers on your testicles. Off the top like Adee Phelan, here's 21 favourites. If you havin' blog problems I feel bad for you, son. I got 99 problems, but a list ain't 1.

Davy DMX - One For The Treble (Fresh) (1984)
MF DOOM - One Beer (2004)
Mac Dre - 2 Hard 4 The F**kin' Radio (1989)
2Pac ft. Snoop Dogg - 2 Of Amerikaz Most Wanted (1996)
Slim Thug ft. T.I. & Bun B - 3 Kings (2004)
GZA ft. Ghostface, Killah Priest & RZA - 4th Chamber (1995)
Whodini - Five Minutes Of Funk (1984)
Ice-T - 6 in The Mornin' (1986)
Geto Boys - 6 Feet Deep (1993)
Public Enemy - 911 Is A Joke (1990)
Digable Planets - 9th Wonder (Blackitolism) (1994)
Notorious B.I.G - Ten Crack Commandments (1997)
Laroo T.H.H. & The Jacka - 20 Bricks (2008)
50 Cent ft. Nate Dogg - 21 Questions (2003)
T.I. - 24's (2003)
Ma$e ft. The Lox, Black Rob & DMX - 24 Hours To Live (1998)
Souls Of Mischief - 93 'Til Infinity (1993)
N.W.A - 100 Miles And Runnin' (1990)
Spice 1 - 187 Proof (1993)
Chief Keef - 3Hunna (2012)
Juvenile - 400 Degreez (1998)

Wipeout!

Surf7 - Goose Coat
(From Goose Coat single; 2026)

Man, this song is such a grower. Philadelphia Drill that mixes the ignorance with the elegance. Tinkle, tinkle, little piano. Possibly titled Goose Coat because it sounds like Christmas snowfall? The remix with Meek Mill isn't necessarily bad, but is so unnecessary.

My Alphabets

I saw Instagram's alphabet musical challenge and a light bulb appeared above my dome. Man, I said to myself "once again it's on!" Thus, here's ur boi's favourite Rap songs for every letter of the alphabet. It's more of headache if you do it one song per artist, so of course I did it thatta way. Bloggin' ain't nothin' but a thing to me, because I'm a double O.G P-O-S-T. Do you know your alphabets, Martaveli? B-L-O-G.

Young Bleed - A Fool (1997)
De La Soul - Breakadawn (1993)
Andre Nickatina - Conversation With A Devil (2003)
MF DOOM ft. Pebbles - Doomsday (1999)
Eazy-E - Eazy-er Said Than Dunn (1988)
Mac Dre - Feelin" Myself (2004)
LL Cool J - Go Cut Creator Go (1987)
Ice-T - High Rollers (1988)
Mic Terror - If God Was Mic (2008) or Special Ed - I Got It Made (1989)
Newcleus - Jam On Revenge (The Wikki Wikki Song) (1983)
T.I. - Kingofdasouth (2003) or Biggie - Kick In The Door (1997)
Spoonie Gee - Love Rap (1980) or Eric B. & Rakim - Lyrics Of Fury (1988)
Z-Ro - Mo City Don (Freestyle) (2005)
Public Enemy - Night Of The Living Baseheads (1988)
Ice Cube - Once Upon A Time In The Projects (1990)
Run-D.M.C. - Peter Piper (1986)
DJ Quik - Quik Is The Name (1991)
Beastie Boys - Rhymin' & Stealin' (1986)
Brand Nubian - Step To The Rear (1990)
Too $hort - The Ghetto (1990) or Slick Rick - The Moment I Feared (1988)
Juvenile - U Understand (clean version) (1999)
Biz Markie - Vapors (LP version) (1988)
Max B - Where Do I Go? (2009)
Dr. Dre ft. Hittmann, Kurupt, Nate Dogg & Six-Two - Xxplosive (1999)
EPMD - You Gots To Chill (1988)
Lil' Boosie ft. Mouse & Yung Joc - Zoom (2006)

Up South Trip

"Like veterans I'm forever servin'
I'm forever swervin', You got weed, I got the better version
I'm forever splurgin', stuff my blunts up like a taxidermist"

Yung Till - 209 Baby
(From 209 Baby single; 2026)

File this one under 'random regional finds.' The lad is from South Carolina, but the song sounds like what Louisiana Swag-Rap might sound like if such a sound ever existed. Call it Travis In That Water.

Late pass!

"Yeah, I had to crush the scene at the beach in Daytona
Call me Pimpy Le Peu, you know the aroma"

Ball Jones ft. Ice Smiles - Krushin' (remix)
(From Welcome To Little Rock compilation; 2004)

I love the DVD Couture Instagram page because it puts me onto random regional choonz I've never heard in my life and might never have heard otherwise. When I say Krushin' (remix) is bangin' in Little Rock I ain't talkin' about that episode of America Undercover, boiiiiiii. This song is naggingly simple and knawed its way into my current rotation with its regional period charm. Wish I'd heard it back in 2004.

Speakin' of 2004, there's been a lotta talk recently about Gym-bore Jones pioneering the rock star look in Rap. Nah, lads. Yous lot wasn't outside when this Canibus photoshoot hit da streetz like an asteroid in '04. As the late, great Gary Warnett once said, 'Bis came with that Bollywood '97 swag.

Canibus collates outfits in a room with 1000 candles lit, meditating on whether that's a shirt or a jacket.

Generic list post: July 2026

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when my favourite lost TV show from my teenage years Betty's Bunch was finally uploaded to YouTube in full. Whatchu know about a 90s Antipodean teen drama show featuring Maggie "The Freak from Prisoner" Kirkpatrick and Paul "Santa Claws from Round The Twist" Chubb?

Ice Cube - Once Upon A Time In The Projects (AI video) (1990/2026)
Z-Ro - Mo City Don (Freestyle) (video) (2005/2026)
Mic Terror - Viagra Triangle (2024)
Mic Terror ft. Easy O'Hare - Rent Money (2026)
BabyChiefDoIt - Ghetto Love Story (2026)
Digital Underground - Blue View (199?/2026)
Trunk Boiz & Seiji Oda ft. Fijiana - Sky Scraper (2026)
Kurupt & DJ Battlecat - Me N The Boyz (2026)
Kurious - Stay Like That (I Am) (2026)
Madonna - L.E.S Girl (2026)

Bonus bloggin: 1nce again I'm gonna use my monthly wrap-up post to keep track of the best movies and TV shows I've been watching. * indicates rewatches dunnit.

Movies I watched and liked:
The One That Got Away (1957)
King Creole (1958)
Heat (1995) *

TV shows I watched and liked:
Betty's Bunch (all 13 episodes) (1990) *
Ann Droid (series 1) (2026)
Mastermind (new episodes) (2026)
Only Connect (new episodes) (2026)
Belgium vs. Senegal (2026)
Argentina vs. Cape Verde (2026)
England vs. Mexico (2026)
Argentina vs. Egypt (2026)
France vs. Spain (2026)
France vs. England (2026)
Salute The Sample (new episodes) (2026)

You 53 and you still rappin?

Kurupt & DJ Battlecat - Me N The Boyz
(From Me N The Boyz single; 2026)

This is the west coast Gangsta-Rap equivalent of Redman doing a track over a James Brown sample innit? Yeah, it's obvious and lazy, but who cares because it jams. Why does Snoop get an official credit here when he's not on the song or in the video?

Late pass!

"Ain't no talkin' in my area
My n****s keep quiet like librarians
That pork and that beef is for barbarians
You see me, I'm more of a pescatarian
Beef with me will have you floatin' in an aquarium"

Mic Terror - Viagra Triangle
(From Viagra Triangle single; 2024)

Mic Terror & his m8s dropped so many loosies throughout 2024 that I managed to miss this one. It's another gem which mixes the ignorance with the elegance on some Chicago "drive slow, homie"-core. If I were gonna collate an album out of Mic's 2024 loosies, I'd use Juicenan Freestyle as the first track and Viagra Triangle here as the final track. Maybe that should be my next playlist? For now tho, here's a list of my top 10 favourite non-2026 Rap songs I've discovered this year.

Run-D.M.C - Jam-Master Jammin' (Rick Rubin remix) (1985)
Biggie Smalls - Biggie Got The Hype Shit (1991)
Me & My Cousin - My Day (1996)
Ma$e ft. Puffy - I'm No Killa (O.G version) (1998)
Rev Run - I Used To Think I Was Run (2005)
Bavgate ft. LJ - Keep It Gangsta (2005)
J-Diggs - Diggs Dance (2005)
Mic Terror - Viagra Triangle (2024)
The Egyptian Lover - Vocoder Jam (2025)
Sir Michael Rocks - Talkin' Legit (2025)

My Mind Spray 24

Seeing great football players from the 2000s/2010s reduced to playing in the MLS and scoring goals against plumbers from Maryland is the sporting equivalent of seeing great rappers from the 1980s/1990s reduced to touring Europe and doing albums produced by the Snow Goons. Yeah, it's undignified, but everybody gotta eat and get their adrenaline rush somehow, right?

Favourite line on a 2026 Rap song: "I'm in my bag like yo' grandmama's peppermints" from Mic Terror's A Year Ago. You know a line is good when you can add it to your IRL lexicon.

That unreleased Digital Underground song Blue View from the recent Sex Packets reissue is cool. It sounds like Shock G had been listening to Bristolian Trip-Hop, but in a good way: Portishead rather than that whispering stoner c**t Tricky.

Shout out to Tricky's Christiansands tho. A notable entry in my personal canon of Shinola Songs By The Shittiest Artists.

Those tech lad Rap fans who did the AI videos for Ice Cube's Once Upon A Time In The Projects and My Summer Vacation should do a video for Slick Rick's The Moment I Feared next. Might be best if they avoid doing one for Rick's Indian Girl (An Adult Story) tho.

I've seen a buncha very promising snippets from BunnaB recently. Thus, I'm very optimistic about her next album.

Every corny "U.K club mix" of a Rap song CJ Mackintosh hacked out in the late 80s/early 90s was worth suffering to get his remix of Whitney Houston's Queen of The Night. The lumpen original transformed into Diva House tremendo. That shit rivals K-Klass' remix of Bobby Brown's Two Can Play That Game in the canon of incredible U.K remixes of U.S pop singles.

Laughin' to the bank

Public Enemy - Can't Do Nuttin' For Ya, Man!
(From Fear Of A Black Planet album; 1990)

Keep yer ears peeled at 0:56 and 2:29. Unless anyone can think of any earlier examples then it's time Flava Flav is recognised & realised as the #actual pioneer of the Max B laugh on wax.

Pour out a little snakebite for L7's Jennifer Finch. L7 were basically four L.A Punk birds doing Motörhead, and so they were one of my favourite bands of the early 90s. No lie, their Bricks Are Heavy LP is as important to me as any of my favourite Rap albums from that era. L7 also had two truly great moments on British TV: their performance of Pretend We're Dead on The Word and Johnny Vaughan interviewing them on Naked City.

In The Trunk (part 2)

Trunk Boiz & Seiji Oda ft. Fijiana - Sky Scraper
(From Right Back In EP; 2026)

A video for one of my favourite cuts from the Trunk Boiz & Seiji Oda EP. I fuxwit this one because it sounds like a Trunk Boiz and Kreayshawn collaboration which should have happened in the early 2010s. And that's the thing: lots of my current favourite choonz sounds like a parallel universe of Rap which never happened but which really should have happened.

Kreayshawn's Gucci Gucci was a true “I guess you guys aren't ready for that yet. But your kids are gonna love it!” song.

21 Years Later

Z-Ro - Mo City Don (Freestyle) (video)
(From Let The Truth Be Told album; 2005/YouTube; 2026)

It's never too late for a proper video to one of the greatest songs in Texas Rap history. A song with no actual chorus which is #actually one long chorus innit. Just press stop or rewind at the 4:30 mark because no discerning Rap connoisseur needs to be reminded of what comes next. True story: when I first copped the Let The Truth Be Told I was so stuck on this song I didn't even listen to the rest of the album until days later. And so here's a generic list post of 30 first songs on albums which were so good they had me in a headlock for days.

Henry Mancini - The Pink Panther Theme (1963)
The Jimi Hendrix Experience - Foxy Lady (1967)
Isaac Hayes - Walk On By (1968)
Curtis Mayfield - (Don't worry) If There's A Hell Below.. (1970)
Baby Huey & The Babysitters - Listen To Me (1971)
Lalo Schifrin - Theme From Enter The Dragon (1973)
Thin Lizzy - Jailbreak (1976)
The Damned - Neat Neat Neat (1977)
Ramones - I Just Wanna Have Something To Do (1978)
Madness - One Step Beyond (1979)
Michael Jackson - Don't Stop Til You Get Enough (1979)
Motörhead - Ace Of Spades (1980)
Prince - Let's Go Crazy (1984)
Run-D.M.C - Peter Piper (1986)
Beastie Boys - Rhymin' & Stealin (1986)
Eric B. & Rakim - Follow The Leader (1988)
Danzig - Twist Of Cain (1988)
N.W.A - Straight Outta Compton (1989)
Kool G. Rap & DJ Polo - Road To The Riches (1989)
Digital Underground - The Humpty Dance (1989)
Freddie Foxxx - The Master (1989)
Faith No More - From Out Of Nowhere (1989)
LL Cool J - Mama Said Knock You Out (1990)
Nirvana - Smells Like Teen Spirit (1991)
Soundgarden - Rusty Cage (1991)
The Diplomats - Un Kasa (2003)
Andre Nickatina - Conversation With A Devil (2003)
Mac Dre - Feelin' Myself (2004)
Z-Ro - Mo City Don (Freestyle) (2005)
Young Bleed - Stamp On It (2011)

You can play this game with me if you want, but there's one rule: all first songs on albums which are preceeded by a skit or an intro are officially excluded.

Surf youts with attitude, kinda groovy

BabyChiefDoIt - Ghetto Love Story
(From R.A.M.B.O album; 2026)

Nowadays you have to look for that Charlie Rambo waviness in places other than Max B's music. What a pleasant surprise to find it in a song by a teenage Chicago Drill rapper which sounds it could be on a new So So Def Bass All-Stars compilation. In fact, this is the most So So Def Bass All-Stars soundin' track since Freak Like Me by Slimeroni. Anyhoo, I'd call Ghetto Love Story my Song of The Summer™, but England is experiencing another 30+ degree heatwave and I'm ready for autumn already.