Why couldn't God have taken Paul McCartney instead of Pete Burns?

Ding dong, lid - the G.O.A.T Scouser is dead. Pour out a little Stella for the singer partially responsible for the greatest duet in TV history AKA the only Celebrity Big Brother contestant who could out-peacock Dennis Rodman AKA Pete "Dragula" Burns.


Dismissed as an 80's one hit wonder who'd Frankensteined himself with cosmetic surgery until his trailblazing reality TV career took flight in the '00s, Pete The Meat was the recording artist David Bowie could have been if the latter weren't a poncey middle-class Cockney trend-hopper who pilfered sounds and cultures on some proto-Drake type shit. It could be argued that Pete from Bebington didn't have the same seismic cultural impact as Ziggy Stardust, but keep pretending to yourself that Dave from Bromley ever recorded a song as good as You Spin Me Round (Like a Record), fam.


We'll all miss Meryseyside's "brickie in heels", let's just hope he's slaggin' off Tracy Bingham with Jesus. As 'Pac nearly said, I wonder if Heaven got a still-lucarative Japanese market to exploit?