I'd given serious consideration to the Final Destination series being the best movie franchise of the noughties (criteria : more than two movies) until seeing the new 3d one the other night. Well, the 2d version (my apologies to my companion for insisting that we head to Cineworld instead of VUE) which, minus the 3rd dimension, rendered the CGI effects almost Jason And The Argonauts-like in their primitivity and, opening racetrack death premonition aside, the majority of the death set-pieces were either uncreative, rejigged deaths from the previous movies or ruined by set-up teases climaxing with *SHOCK* whoops-a-daisy-there-goes-a-flying-rock deaths .
So, a neuron-rotting waste of money then, but the first 4 flicks are about as enjoyable as it's got this decade, particularly this scene from Final Destination 3. In Annie Hall, Woody Allen theorizes that the sun is bad for you, which we're not quite sure whether we agree with (Vitamin D deficiency ain't 'bout it), but we'll concede that tanning salons are unquestionably bad for you, as these 2 birds found out :
The blond reminds me of a rich airhead version of Eric Stoltz's sister in Some Kind Of Wonderful, which can only be a good thing, and director James Wong deserves credit for restraining himself from using the obvious choice of Disco Inferno by The Trammps for this scene by, instead, plumping for the stellar selection of Love Rollercoaster by Ohio Players, as it's hard to envision any other song soundtracking this scene now.
As proof that tanning salons truly are havens of evil, The Martorialist crew recently found ourselves at a tanning salon owned by Dina from BBC3 spoilt-brat reality show Young, Dumb & Living Off Mum's dad, Darren, and the atmosphere became tense when a mutual acquaintance turned out to be someone who once ripped him off at a car auction. You certainly didn't hear him swear like that on the telly.